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Man or woman?

Today, my six-year-old got in an argument with my four-year-old. I told them to go outside. The next thing I know, my son was standing in front of his sister's burning Barbie's Malibu Dream House, singing "Burn Baby Burn" and cackling madly. FML

#17884513
423 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32857) - you deserved it (9225)

On 10/02/2011 at 3:27am - kids - by TraumatizedMother (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was babysitting a young boy. I accidentally let a few words slip when I dropped something. He won't stop dropping the F bomb and his mother is coming to get him in the morning. FML

#17883500
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10017) - you deserved it (33539)

On 10/02/2011 at 12:53am - kids - by Kelly - United States (Florida)

Today, I got mad at my 4 year old son for cussing me out. Afterwards, I went upstairs to get ready for the day. When I came back downstairs I found him pooping on my brand new leather couch. FML

#17880683
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27117) - you deserved it (10618)

On 10/01/2011 at 7:10pm - kids - by kewtness_17 - United States (Texas)

Today, I was giving an anti-drugs speech to a group of ninth graders. I got onto the topic of trafficking from problem countries and asked a student to point out Mexico City on a map. He hesitated a few seconds before pointing at Canada. What the hell has the education system come to? FML

#17874852
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29709) - you deserved it (2932)

On 09/30/2011 at 10:55pm - kids - by jesus christ - United States

Today, my 5 year old daughter told me that I needed to stay 50 feet away from her at all times when we were at school, mostly because I didn't hang with the cool parents. FML

#17826099
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26017) - you deserved it (3384)

On 09/25/2011 at 12:03am - kids - by Lolaa123 - United States

Today, I walked in on my daughter trying to tan herself with her regular desk lamp. She won't believe that it wouldn't give her a tan. She's 16 years old. This isn't the first time this has happened. FML

#17786213
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29496) - you deserved it (4664)

On 09/20/2011 at 3:24am - kids - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my five year old ran down the street wearing nothing but flip flops, Star Wars underwear, and a baseball helmet. He was swinging a badminton racket while screaming "THIS IS SPARTA!" My neighbors watched laughing as I had to run after him down the street in my pajamas. FML

#17767423
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29551) - you deserved it (8251)

On 09/17/2011 at 9:20pm - kids - by awesomekidsmum - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my daughter spoke her first words. Her dad had been practicing with her for weeks in secret. She crawled to me and said, "I poop." FML

#17761729
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25905) - you deserved it (4220)

On 09/17/2011 at 12:36am - kids - by applesmama - United States (Tennessee)

Today, in a desperate bid to avoid going to the doctor, my young son ran into and hid inside a cactus garden. I had to drag him out. FML

#17758284
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21710) - you deserved it (2448)

On 09/16/2011 at 3:26pm - kids - by Chandler - United States

Today, while teaching my high school class about astronomy, I showed them a picture of earth from space. One girl raised her hand, and asked me what the "white things" were. In other words, clouds. FML

#17757259
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24385) - you deserved it (2642)

On 09/16/2011 at 10:42am - kids - by Smart - United States

Today, I got a call from my daughter's school saying that she had beat someone up. She's 4. FML

#17746655
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26574) - you deserved it (5448)

On 09/14/2011 at 8:21pm - kids - by unknown - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I got home from work to find my wife asleep in her easy chair with my two year old son asleep in a pile of torn-up paper. I soon found out it was my 1960s collection of a Superman comic book series that I inherited from my dad. It was worth well over $2,000. FML

#17731995
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38613) - you deserved it (4594)

On 09/12/2011 at 10:15pm - kids - by Randy - United States (Alabama)

Today, I had to clean up after the kid that discovered he could finger paint with his poo. FML

#17720492
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30964) - you deserved it (2765)

On 09/11/2011 at 3:16pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Derbyshire)



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