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Today, my daughter finally gave birth to twin boys. She informed me that she named them Peregrin Took and Meriadoc Brandybuck. My grandsons are named after Hobbits. FML

#20194616
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22403) - you deserved it (4519)

On 12/06/2012 at 11:49pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my daughter called me to pick her up at the mall. She said I had to meet her inside a specific store, so I figured she wanted me to pay for something. Turns out I was right, she was being arrested for shoplifting. FML

#20193017
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16524) - you deserved it (1427)

On 12/05/2012 at 9:32pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, after telling my young kids all about Santa, his reindeer and his sleigh, we saw him. Smoking a cigarette in the beat-up car next to ours at a red light. FML

#20192265
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13775) - you deserved it (2630)

On 12/05/2012 at 11:50am - kids - by JessThompson - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I bought my son a nice car for his 18th birthday. When I gave it to him, he just got mad and told me that if I really wanted to spend that much money on him, I should've used it to help him pay for college. FML

#20192045
262 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11093) - you deserved it (36051)

On 12/05/2012 at 6:27am - kids - by Anonymous - Israel

Today, I came home from the hospital diagnosed with high blood pressure. It's caused by stress. My wife had a very long talk with my son about it. All the kid has been doing for the past 2 hours is scream at his Playstation. I'd rather be at the hospital. FML

#20188739
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13208) - you deserved it (1873)

On 12/02/2012 at 11:03pm - kids - by Nick (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, my son turned 8. We watched as he unwrapped a $55 Nerf gun, extra 'bullets', new shoes and a school bag with his favorite TV character on the front and a action figure inside. As he finished he looked me straight in the eyes and says, "That's great ma, but seriously what'd you get me?". FML

#20187584
321 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24422) - you deserved it (8109)

On 12/02/2012 at 3:19am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my 5 kids were singing their favorite Christmas carols in the van, each trying to sing louder than the others. It would have probably sounded better if they were all singing the same song. FML

#20183806
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15188) - you deserved it (2862)

On 11/29/2012 at 9:22am - kids - by Dave (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I caught the train into the city. Halfway there some kids hopped on smelling of marijuana and alcohol. Their topic of discussion? How much pubic hair they had. FML

#20183521
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14922) - you deserved it (2053)

On 11/29/2012 at 12:40am - kids - by fabs1171 - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, in a state of extreme boredom, I decided to dress my 6-month-old son in girl's clothes. As he sat in my lap in a frilly dress, and as I was placing a very pink and lacy bow on his head, my mother-in-law unexpectedly walked in. She now thinks I'm mentally unstable and should be in therapy. FML

Today, I heard a teenage boy ask his friend, "So, is it, like, November in Australia too?" This is the future of America. FML

#20179140
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17529) - you deserved it (1544)

On 11/26/2012 at 12:27am - kids - by toritoratora - United States (California)

Today, I was playing with my four year old cousin. He had a toy whale and said, "Shark!" I corrected him and told him it was a whale. He picked it up, threw it at my face, and yelled, "SHAAARK!" FML

#20176364
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12493) - you deserved it (4725)

On 11/24/2012 at 8:59am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I caught my teenage daughter smoking, and tried calmly explaining to her that it's quite bad for her health. She replied with, "It doesn't harm you if you're under 20." FML

#20174862
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20767) - you deserved it (3015)

On 11/23/2012 at 4:07am - kids - by RyanJarmanForPresident (woman) - United States

Today, I was messing around with my wife. I grabbed her boobs and said, "Honk honk". Unbeknownst to me, my daughter saw it. Now my 3-year-old girl runs around honking everyone. Even her grandparents. FML

#20172916
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8800) - you deserved it (22218)

On 11/21/2012 at 8:20pm - kids - by piemasterzim (man) - Canada



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