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Today, I was putting a wristband on a little boy's wrist so he could swim in the waterpark. Just before I finished, he coughed all over my hands and arms. I finished and looked up at the boy just in time for us to make eye contact and for him to cough directly into my face. FML

#1471
14 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18898) - you deserved it (1978)

On 01/17/2009 at 3:57pm - kids - by kallens - United States (Minnesota)

Today, a student of mine used the phrase "well, you know, like back in your day" about defining "going out". I'm only 24. FML

#1158
15 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19810) - you deserved it (1730)

On 01/14/2009 at 6:20pm - kids - by Old? - United States (Washington)

Today, my 5 year old daughter watched me getting dressed in the bathroom and asked "mum, when my boobs grow, will they droop like yours?". FML

#983
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25036) - you deserved it (2884)

On 01/12/2009 at 4:37am - kids - by Lax - Sent from mobile version

Today, I fell asleep on the train, totally wiped out after last night's party, which involved lots of booze and spicy Indian food. I wake up and notice a small boy staring at me, so I smiled at him. He turned to his father and said, "Daddy, the farting man has just woken up." FML

#947
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19858) - you deserved it (7942)

On 01/10/2009 at 9:11pm - kids - by mark - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was teaching a class but kids were chatting. After 3 soap box speeches about "The next person who talks gets a note to take home," one kid looked right at me and went "meow". FML

#891
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20826) - you deserved it (6531)

On 01/09/2009 at 3:54am - kids - by Liz - Sent from mobile version

Today, I tried to cuddle Simon, my five year old son. He wriggled away and said: "If you need a teddy bear, go buy one! Or find another Simon!" FML

#697
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26670) - you deserved it (3049)

On 01/03/2009 at 10:55pm - kids - by sly - Sent from mobile version

Today, at 7 in the morning, I end up outside in a night dress, with bare feet and in the rain. I've just found out that my two year old son now knows how to close the patio door, which of course, has no outside door handle. FML

#685
21 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18778) - you deserved it (3085)

On 01/02/2009 at 8:22pm - kids - by lilou - Sent from mobile version

Today, my wife and I both have blond hair and blue eyes, we just had a red headed son. FML

#767
363 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35861) - you deserved it (7617)

On 12/31/2008 at 10:45pm - kids - by - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was baby-sitting four rather noisy and rowdy kids. After a two hour struggle, I finally manage to get them into bed. I then ask them what they want before going to sleep, and the eldest replies: "Can you tell us a story where you die at the end?" FML

#624
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29286) - you deserved it (2595)

On 12/29/2008 at 5:56am - kids - by Hellau - Sent from mobile version

Today, as I was pressed for time, I opened some canned food for dinner. When my children were served, they said, "Mmm, this is best meal you've ever cooked for us!" I cook healthy, balanced meals every day. FML

#557
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20656) - you deserved it (7032)

On 12/20/2008 at 7:23am - kids - by Lola - Sent from mobile version

Today, my son laughed at me when I tried to get him to put a bit more effort into his schoolwork. His grandmother had kindly given him all my shitty school reports from when I was his age. FML

#493
18 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20462) - you deserved it (6481)

On 12/11/2008 at 7:21am - kids - by fataldisease - Sent from mobile version

Today, on the bus, a young high school boy sat down next to me and started to chat me up. I thought it was cute until he asked me which high school I was attending. I'm 27, I'm married, I have a child. FML

#483
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24676) - you deserved it (5480)

On 12/09/2008 at 11:58pm - kids - by Rita - Sent from mobile version

Today, my two year old girl said "motherfucker". Everyone laughed, even her grandparents. Our family is insane. FML

#446
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27725) - you deserved it (8131)

On 12/03/2008 at 11:39pm - kids - by Noname - Sent from mobile version



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