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Today, I saw my neighbor's son mowing their lawn when suddenly he started to do this crazy dance. Chuckling at his antics I waved and walked back into my house. His mom called me from a hospital later to ask if I could put the mower away; he had been attacked by bees. FML

#1643455
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17853) - you deserved it (41675)

On 05/04/2009 at 8:46pm - kids - by Jon (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, while watching TV, I danced, sang along, and helped Dora the Explorer get to her Grandmother's house. It was the most fun I've had all year. I'm 21. FML

#1619469
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55031) - you deserved it (26245)

On 05/04/2009 at 5:09am - kids - by Amey (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was babysitting this little girl. She told me she wanted to go to the park so we did. When we were walking back, I was caring her on my back. When were almost at the door, she told me she had to go pee. I told her to hold it. As we were walking in the door I felt a warm spot on my back. FML

#1589486
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39539) - you deserved it (14941)

On 05/03/2009 at 11:15am - kids - by Dumbblonde (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was taking a nap on the couch when my 2 year old daughter decided that daddy needed an ear cleaning. With all the grace of toddler-hood, she stabbed me in the eardrum with a Q-tip. Now I can't hear her coming. FML

#1584585
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13314) - you deserved it (1505)

On 05/03/2009 at 3:15am - kids - by bodhimae - Sent from mobile version

Today, my 6 year old granddaughter was sitting on my lap playing with the rings on my fingers. After a moment, she pointed to a gold ring with many jewels and said, "When you die can I have that one?" FML

#1579657
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51308) - you deserved it (2849)

On 05/03/2009 at 12:16am - kids - by itswhateverr (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my 6 year old daughter asked me, "what would happen to me if you and daddy died?". I told her that she'd probably live with her Uncle Ant and Aunt Ilene. She looked at me and said "You guys can die. I won't cry. I get everything I want over there." FML

#1551610
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (85287) - you deserved it (8274)

On 05/02/2009 at 4:12am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my daughter said "I love you mom", to me for the first time I can remember. She is 16 years old. She said it because I bought her first thong. FML

#1509670
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57894) - you deserved it (10389)

On 04/30/2009 at 10:50pm - kids - by mylove (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was babysitting a 4 year-old with a speech impediment. I asked her, "Do you got your bag?" And she said, "No. I have my bag. Babies say got. I'm a big girl." I am 20 years old and in the honors program in my college. I was corrected by a 4 year-old with a speech impediment. FML

#1490336
263 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13026) - you deserved it (88988)

On 04/30/2009 at 1:42pm - kids - by Nanny (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was babysitting a four year old. He was mad and began hitting me. I told him to use his words not his fists when he's mad. He then began telling me how much he hated me and that I should go die and never come back. FML

#1474084
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41196) - you deserved it (16361)

On 04/29/2009 at 9:34pm - kids - by GirlinGreen - United States (Washington)

Today, trying to make my 6 year old daughter to laugh, I drew a picture of a butt, a puff of air coming out and the word "toot". My daughter thought it extremely funny. Later, when she was talking with my extremely judgmental mother-in-law, I heard her say "daddy taught me how to draw butts." FML

#1453459
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18072) - you deserved it (45080)

On 04/29/2009 at 6:12am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, as I was picking up my 7 year old daughter at my ex husband's house my daughter started crying saying that she wanted to stay with daddy forever. I asked why. She said her stepmom was a better mommy. Apparently the woman who broke up my marriage is now a better "mommy". FML

#1444168
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (89587) - you deserved it (7859)

On 04/29/2009 at 12:13am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my kids told me that for the FIRST time, my cooking was delicious. I made Kraft dinner that night. FML

#1427815
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38742) - you deserved it (7355)

On 04/28/2009 at 4:47pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was walking in the kitchen with my parrot on my shoulder and my dog running around. Something freaked out my bird and she bit my ear and started flapping her wings in my face. Surprised, I took a step back, tripped over my dog, fell, hit my head on the stove, and got knocked unconscious. FML

#1341827
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45131) - you deserved it (7305)

On 04/26/2009 at 12:07am - kids - by margretlle (woman) - United States (Florida)



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