Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, my 5 year old daughter figured out how to use the microwave, microwaving my brand new 3G iphone. It was completely wrecked. So was the microwave. FML

#6078140
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31279) - you deserved it (5990)

On 10/31/2009 at 12:22am - kids - by Mike (man) - United Kingdom (Blackpool)

Today, my son couldn't find all the parts to his Cub Scout uniform. I had a serious talk with him about being prepared, and how he would need to live with the consequences of not having the right outfit on. When we arrived at the meeting, everyone was in costumes because it's Halloween. I forgot. FML

#6056189
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5799) - you deserved it (38005)

On 10/29/2009 at 3:20pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, the door to my daughter's room became jammed and wouldn't open while she was in the room. Being resourceful, I grabbed my ladder and climbed up to her window, only to end up stuck in her window. I'm not sure what was worse, getting stuck, or being laughed at by my neighbors for a while. FML

#6018223
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20952) - you deserved it (7810)

On 10/27/2009 at 12:45am - kids - by Chub (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my three-year-old decided to dump the entire contents of her cereal box onto the kitchen floor because she was looking for a "prize." The only prize we found was a huge dead cockroach, which she promptly stuck in her mouth. FML

#6013490
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32192) - you deserved it (3290)

On 10/26/2009 at 8:42pm - kids - by laxie (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my husband's daughter told us that she's 5 months pregnant. I'm going to be a step grandmother and I'm only 23 years old. FML

#6001127
260 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19147) - you deserved it (43283)

On 10/26/2009 at 12:27am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my daughter threw a can of hairspray into the fireplace because she saw someone do it on YouTube. FML

#5987362
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38220) - you deserved it (4495)

On 10/25/2009 at 5:06am - kids - by oh dear - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was having a nice moment with my granddaughter as she was being affectionate by stroking my face. We were both quite content, until she said, "Aw, Grandma, your skin feels just like a crocodile." FML

#5977481
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29296) - you deserved it (2960)

On 10/24/2009 at 5:14pm - kids - by Granny (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, I was playing Farmville all day, and I was really into the game. I was getting phone calls all day, but I kept ignoring them cause I was making so much Farm Money. Come to find out it was my son's school. He fell off the jungle gym and broke his arm. FML

#5970435
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7932) - you deserved it (124833)

On 10/24/2009 at 3:25am - kids - by stewhart (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I told my brother to piss off. He decided to do exactly that, from the balcony onto my lap. FML

#5930750
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12854) - you deserved it (29351)

On 10/21/2009 at 5:03pm - kids - by holy (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I found out who the father of my sister's 4 year old son is. My husband of 7 years. FML

#5928824
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60804) - you deserved it (3023)

On 10/21/2009 at 2:31pm - kids - by Jessica (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, I saw my son. I didn't know I had a son. FML

#5919547
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37709) - you deserved it (22499)

On 10/20/2009 at 8:44pm - kids - by Raiders4ever (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I found out my 10 year old step-brother has an obsession with fire, after he burnt all the belongings in my room, including an £600 guitar. FML

#5910147
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36511) - you deserved it (2486)

On 10/20/2009 at 6:46am - kids - by NikkiiFireStarter (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I told my 13 year old daughter that she was grounded from using her phone. Later on, I get an important call regarding a job that I have been after. After I'd picked up the phone, my daughter starts screaming "HELP! RAPE! HELP!" on the other phone. I don't think I'll be getting the job. FML

#5887611
257 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38671) - you deserved it (7828)

On 10/18/2009 at 10:33pm - kids - by MGZ (woman) - United States (Georgia)



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