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Man or woman?

Today, after weeks of money slowly disappearing from the stash in my bedroom, I confronted my son about it. I'm not sure which is worse: that my son is a thief or that he actually blamed his father for it. We've been divorced and haven't spoken for eight years. FML

#16091812
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33463) - you deserved it (4289)

On 05/08/2011 at 2:25pm - kids - by jill (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I went on a long overdue vacation to France with my husband and young daughter. As revenge for an earlier prank, my sister has apparently taught my daughter to swear profusely in French. FML

#16068567
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29941) - you deserved it (9018)

On 05/06/2011 at 3:16pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Windsor and Maidenhead)

Today, my identical twin sister got in trouble for sneaking out of the house to see her boyfriend. My father decided to ground both of us, because it would be "too confusing" for him otherwise. FML

#16057937
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63499) - you deserved it (4973)

On 05/05/2011 at 5:04pm - kids - by Monika (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, after teaching my 4 year old son about the concept of "Stranger Danger," we had gone to a park full of people. When I walked up to him to tell him we had to leave, he ran, screaming "Stranger! Don't touch me!" FML

#16028300
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38059) - you deserved it (7623)

On 05/03/2011 at 1:01am - kids - by armywife980 -

Today, I once again told my son he needed a job and a girlfriend because I simply could not keep him in my house anymore. He yelled, "No, I can do whatever I want!" Then went back to playing video games. He's 38. FML

#15960842
375 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31953) - you deserved it (44626)

On 04/28/2011 at 7:07am - kids - by oldmama728 -

Today, I woke my husband up at 2am, screaming that there was a badger in our bedroom. We both screamed for a bit until he finally says, "What are we screaming about!?" I took a second look at the badger, and realized it was my four year old daughter with her blanket. FML

#15947062
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14883) - you deserved it (42013)

On 04/27/2011 at 9:35am - kids - by BadgerSpirit (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I actually heard my 14 year old son muse to himself, "If I can drive drunk in Grand Theft Auto, how hard could it be in real life?" FML

#15935332
358 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43070) - you deserved it (13070)

On 04/26/2011 at 3:20pm - kids - by nomorexbox - United States (Georgia)

Today, my 4 year old daughter walked in while I was changing my shirt. She said "When I get older I am going to have big boobies just like you." I'm her dad. FML

#15896791
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35972) - you deserved it (24153)

On 04/23/2011 at 11:20am - kids - by parentof5 (man) - United States

Today, I was listening to my son's teacher gossip about students whilst in the grocery store. I was thrilled when she described my son as "A model student". However, she then went on to say, "Which is surprising considering that his parents are trailer trash." FML

#15895508
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44709) - you deserved it (8136)

On 04/23/2011 at 5:26am - kids - by kindgartin (man) - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, a very attractive girl moved in across the road from me. As I was leaving, I noticed she was looking out her window at me. I tried playing it cool, only to end up tripping over my own feet, hands in pocket, and faceplanting the hood of my dad's car. FML

#15890797
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30551) - you deserved it (19549)

On 04/22/2011 at 9:39pm - kids - by NathanPlays - United States (California)

Today, I told my son that his grades are dropping and his behavior is getting out of hand. To which he replied, "Yeah, so is your weight." FML

#15843459
328 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40779) - you deserved it (16387)

On 04/19/2011 at 2:38am - kids - by randa -

Today, I watched Free Willy with my daughter. Later on she decided to free her 6 pet mice into the house. FML

#15838713
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31123) - you deserved it (8178)

On 04/18/2011 at 8:48pm - kids - by Jukka -

Today, I thought it would be funny to tickle my daughter's foot, which she hates. One bloody nose, multiple scratches and 4 toe-shaped bruises later, she's the one laughing. FML

#15831633
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11893) - you deserved it (56036)

On 04/18/2011 at 4:09am - kids - by B (man) - United Kingdom (Essex)



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