By SaintGoobers - 06/10/2014 20:24 - United States - Cambridge

Today, my loving five-year-old daughter started singing Christmas carols again. Ones that she made up herself, of course. Including "Walking in a fucking wonderland" and "Rudolph the red nosed asshole". FML
I agree, your life sucks 36 403
You deserved it 10 369

SaintGoobers tells us more.

Hey Buddy, this is the first time Ady has ever cussed, or at least with me viewing it. She claims that her Father was singing the songs so she thought she would sing with him. I will be talking to her dad! Lol.

Top comments

Greenteamextreme 16

They sound better then the originals if you ask me!

She's five, dude, you as a parent should do your job

Comments

Greenteamextreme 16

They sound better then the originals if you ask me!

lexiieeex3 32

Agreed. I actually snorted while reading this fml.

Try to correct her language, teach her some non offensive parodys and encourage her to come up with her own. We used to have about twelve verses for we three kings when I was a kid, can't remember them now. There's always the British Classic, "hark the herald angels sing, Wallis Simpson stole our king".

JMichael 25

I'll admit I let loose a small chuckle at this FML.

LostInTheZone11 29

What about the Tales From The Crypt: Have Yourself a Scary Little Christmas album?

'Joy to the world, that Barney's dead, we barbecued his head! Don't worry about his body, we flushed it down the potty! (Let heaven and nature sing' 3x)!

Jingle bells batman smells, robin laid an egg.

incoherentrmblr 21

Was it a Christmas on Halloween rendition?...

We sang "we three kings of oreintar tried to smoke a rubber cigar, it was loaded, it exploded."

We three kings of orient are, one in a taxi one in a car, one on a scooter blowing his hooter.

RA91 26

Deck the halls with gasoline! *falalalalalalalala* Light a match, then run and scream! *falalalalalalalala*

She's five, dude, you as a parent should do your job

Aero_x 21

this could be the first time something like this has happened. and she might have learned it from preschool or daycare.

I agree. You should step up and be a parent, and get her a record contract immediately!

while I generally agree, 5 year olds don't really understand what those words mean, and if you tell them not to say the words, they usually say them more. Best thing to do is to rationally explain that those are "mean" words, but if you yell at her everytime she says one, she won't stop.

5 year olds do understand, and if you teach them right, they will listen. source: big sister to 5, and I've worked with school age kids for 3 years

It's really not a terrible thing that she knows the words, as long as you teach her that they aren't polite and not to say them in public it's fine. Parents get way too riled up when their young kid says a "bad word." It's just a word, your kid is fine, haha

Hey Buddy, this is the first time Ady has ever cussed, or at least with me viewing it. She claims that her Father was singing the songs so she thought she would sing with him. I will be talking to her dad! Lol.

Perhaps teach her father the carrol "chestnuts roasting on an open fire" I'm sure he will watch what he sings in front of her from then on

NiceGuysDoWin 21
uniformed 13

Just proves that kids are just like drunk adults

Dang shes already making covers? this girl is going somewhere!

Sounds like someone has been teaching her fun new Christmas words. Maybe you should have a chat with her father?

Why do you assume it's the father who taught her those words?

Some incredible sexism there #7, have a gold star.

I apologize if I was unclear. My comment wasn't intended to be sexist. I just gathered based on OP's disapproval that she didn't teach her daughter those words, so I looked for the next obvious influence in a young child's life. It had nothing to do with him being male.

how do you know the mother is saying it and not the father

It was her father actually, so leave the lady alone. She wasn't being sexist and did not offend me at all. We will both be watching our mouths more carefully.

Sounds better than half the popular stuff already! Sign her to a record deal!!!