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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, I realized that I'm so bored of my relationship with my girlfriend, I'd rather make sure I don't break the springs in my bed than make love to her. FML

#9068161
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8395) - you deserved it (22193)

On 03/14/2010 at 5:57am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Newcastle upon Tyne)

Today, I was in bed with my boyfriend, in the middle of foreplay, and somehow out of my mouth came, "I want to be inside you." I'm a woman. FML

#9066532
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23941) - you deserved it (9629)

On 03/14/2010 at 3:54am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my dad asked me if I could convince my mother to get a Brazillian wax. If that's not bad enough, my mother heard and yelled from the other room, "I like my furball." FML

#9041294
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35832) - you deserved it (2585)

On 03/13/2010 at 5:35am - intimacy - by Grossed Out - Australia (Victoria)

Today, after going to the doctor to have him look at a rash on my man bits, I asked him how to get rid of the redness. He shrugged and said: "Don't worry, nobody will see it other than you and me." He's right. FML

#9029398
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24636) - you deserved it (2794)

On 03/12/2010 at 7:19pm - intimacy - by argh (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I had to explain to my sister why it's unhygienic, socially unacceptable and downright inappropriate to apply Thrush ointment in the lounge room. I realised I wasn't getting through to her when she called me ''Uptight,'' ''Victorian" and ''prudish'' to name a few. FML

#9017056
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18733) - you deserved it (2758)

On 03/12/2010 at 3:26am - intimacy - by 1378 (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I found out my ex boyfriend who recently cheated on me and broke up with me for another girl, has herpes. Guess how I found out? FML

#8993133
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38288) - you deserved it (4222)

On 03/11/2010 at 7:50am - intimacy - by cheated (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, while getting it on with my wife, I started to talk dirty to her. She started laughing. When I asked her if she wanted me to stop, she just kept on laughing. FML

#8993130
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17822) - you deserved it (4203)

On 03/11/2010 at 7:50am - intimacy - by StretchNuts - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, when he finished, seemingly angry. He stood there naked complaining for 15 minutes about how our sex sucked. Then he demanded that I dress him because "it's my fault his clothes were off in the first place". FML

#8980623
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33832) - you deserved it (5291)

On 03/10/2010 at 8:10pm - intimacy - by cmore - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having phone sex when he stopped responding. Five minutes later and ready to hang up, he apologized because he got distracted with his game of Tetris. FML

#8973214
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21330) - you deserved it (3605)

On 03/10/2010 at 3:29pm - intimacy - by Jamie - United States (Florida)

Today, while on the bus, an old man told me about all the many things he wanted to do with my various orifices. FML

#8972575
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23281) - you deserved it (2473)

On 03/10/2010 at 2:54pm - intimacy - by robotchickens (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, when I went to see a movie with my best friend, and there were 3 girls loudly discussing blow job techniques. I texted my boyfriend about how gross the conversation was. His reply was "Pay attention. You might learn something." FML

#8966717
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13677) - you deserved it (27265)

On 03/10/2010 at 6:05am - intimacy - by ohno - United States

Today, I found the purity ring I lost a year ago. Too bad I lost my virginity 4 months ago. FML

#8928407
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6657) - you deserved it (31500)

On 03/08/2010 at 8:11pm - intimacy - by BNLM - United States

Today, my boyfriend said we should re-enact a porn episode he saw. I jokingly said yes. He had an outfit and everything. I thought it was going to be fun, until he started playing Bon Jovi in the background. FML

#8910631
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18791) - you deserved it (5850)

On 03/08/2010 at 12:42am - intimacy - by Ah - Sent from mobile version



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