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Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, my dad called my cell. He ended the phone call with, "and tell your boyfriend to shut up, I can hear him moaning." FML

#10696797
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15795) - you deserved it (43462)

On 05/22/2010 at 7:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job, which was great, until she started saying "milk the penis... miiiiilk the penis." FML

#10667407
311 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46836) - you deserved it (13784)

On 05/21/2010 at 11:46am - intimacy - by mperrotta913 (man) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I was having an affair with a girl from my work. She scratched my back while we were doing it and I didn't want my wife to find out so I threw myself down the stairs at work and ended up having to go to the hospital. FML

#10658705
546 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17010) - you deserved it (257542)

On 05/20/2010 at 10:33pm - intimacy - by Chichensoup (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, he started pretending he was a dog. This included barking, licking my face, and scratching his ears. FML

#10649271
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36109) - you deserved it (6158)

On 05/20/2010 at 2:32pm - intimacy - by kjdhfakjs (woman) - United States (California)

Today, the guy I'm seeing and I were having sex. While I was having my orgasm, he looked at me and said "SHHHH!". FML

#10643187
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36732) - you deserved it (7750)

On 05/20/2010 at 2:25am - intimacy - by evelynn - Sent from mobile version

Today, after finally moving into a better neighborhood, my family and I were greeted by the elderly couple who live window to window to us. How? By hearing them have sex loudly and then praying for forgiveness even louder. Welcome to the neighborhood! FML

#10628803
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36046) - you deserved it (3115)

On 05/19/2010 at 3:20pm - intimacy - by GrossedOutKary (woman) - Puerto Rico

Today, while me and my boyfriend were having sex, he moaned out his own name. FML

#10624819
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50388) - you deserved it (6949)

On 05/19/2010 at 8:12am - intimacy - by during - United States (Michigan)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me through Skype, with the message "my penis wants more, but my heart and mind don't want to hurt you." FML

#10462251
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35001) - you deserved it (3857)

On 05/11/2010 at 4:56am - intimacy - by justsingle (woman) - Philippines

Today, if it wasn't already embarrassing enough to tell my boyfriend I was on my period, I had to explain what a period is in the first place, how it works, and why it means nothing can happen during that time of the month. He's twenty. FML

#10435467
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43704) - you deserved it (6032)

On 05/09/2010 at 12:29pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I realized that going back on birth control has made my acne go away and my boobs bigger. However, to my boyfriend's dismay, I've completely lost my sex drive. FML

#10435354
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34498) - you deserved it (4892)

On 05/09/2010 at 12:19pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was buying condoms for my girlfriend and myself. While at the checkout counter, my guy friend sees me, runs to me, puts his arm around me, kisses me on the cheek, then yells "Thank you baby!" There were about twenty people behind me, they all gave me dirty looks. FML

#10433872
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36966) - you deserved it (9516)

On 05/09/2010 at 10:20am - intimacy - by imustbegay - United States

Today, I had sex for the first time in months. His apology took longer than the sex did. FML

#10433797
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32089) - you deserved it (4680)

On 05/09/2010 at 10:15am - intimacy - by izzie (woman) - Canada (Newfoundland and Labrador)

Today, my family and I went to the mall. We all split up in a department store to shop for our own clothes. While shopping, I caught my dad feeling up a mannequin in the back corner of the store. FML

#10414091
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39321) - you deserved it (3248)

On 05/08/2010 at 6:07am - intimacy - by notmydad. (woman) - Philippines (Manila)



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