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Man or woman?

Today, I caught my boyfriend cheating on me. He claimed it wasn't cheating because he's not romantically attracted to her. FML

#21375288
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31858) - you deserved it (2631)

On 03/15/2015 at 9:10pm - intimacy - by why - United States (Arizona)

Today, at Walmart, I overheard a lady telling a teenage girl that the secret to keeping a guy for life is giving him anal, but that it's important to clean your "shitter" beforehand. I can't believe these kinds of sick freaks actually exist. FML

#21375051
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29038) - you deserved it (7816)

On 03/15/2015 at 1:54pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, some homeless person came up to the window and started doing a voice-over. FML

#21374736
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (396) - you deserved it (10242)

On 03/14/2015 at 11:02pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, what my friends call my "resting bitch face" freaked my boyfriend out enough during sex that he went soft inside me. FML

#21374265
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29467) - you deserved it (6503)

On 03/14/2015 at 4:22am - intimacy - by sa la vash (woman) - Netherlands

Today, I spent 5 hours organizing my porn collection on my computer. What the hell am I doing with my life? FML

#21373875
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23689) - you deserved it (22256)

On 03/13/2015 at 3:35pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Bahrain (Al Manamah)

Today, I jokingly sent my girlfriend a link to an article about giving better head. She didn't think it was funny, and has since sent me numerous articles about the female orgasm, and I just got a link to the Wikipedia article about the clitoris. FML

#21372045
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (149) - you deserved it (47270)

On 03/10/2015 at 7:15pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I got my first handjob. I also found out today that a girl can pull your skin hard enough to cause it to bleed profusely. FML

#21371903
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34780) - you deserved it (3896)

On 03/10/2015 at 3:11pm - intimacy - by Anonymous -

Today, an old friend of mine landed in Spain, where he's visiting me. After a few minutes talking about where we should meet, we realized the reason he couldn't figure out where it was, was probably due to the fact that he was in Barcelona. I live in Madrid. FML

#21371100
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31361) - you deserved it (4040)

On 03/09/2015 at 10:24am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Spain (Aragon)

Today, my girlfriend took off my pants for the first time. She was more impressed by the pattern on my boxers than by my cock. FML

#21370915
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31496) - you deserved it (5749)

On 03/09/2015 at 1:13am - intimacy - by fruitoftheloom - United States (Arizona)

Today, I moved into my new apartment. As I sat in my living room watching Netflix, I found out that my window has an excellent view of my new neighbors, who just so happen to like to shag with the blinds open. I guess I'll be buying some curtains. FML

#21370722
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26452) - you deserved it (2782)

On 03/08/2015 at 9:05pm - intimacy - by curtain buyer - United States (New York)

Today, my little sister complained about a young boy in her class always pulling her hair. She asked when boys will stop doing it. My mom replied, "They won't, even when they're grown-ups," then looked over at my dad and shared a dirty smirk. FML

#21369959
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35504) - you deserved it (3252)

On 03/07/2015 at 2:09pm - intimacy - by greatly disturbed - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend was pleasuring me with his hands. After two years of being together, he was finally about to make me orgasm for the first time by himself. Just as I was reaching my peak, he orgasmed at the thought of finishing me off and stopped. FML

#21367801
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41772) - you deserved it (3461)

On 03/04/2015 at 2:55am - intimacy - by Highnapple - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I thought I had carbon monoxide poisoning because I had the symptoms and my detector was going off. I called the fire dept, they checked me, they checked my apartment. My apartment is fine; I'm just out of shape, have high blood pressure, and don't know how to work simple electronics. FML

#21367736
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27634) - you deserved it (8893)

On 03/04/2015 at 12:12am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Nevada)



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