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Today, I applied some things I learned reading a "How to please a woman" book. My wife was in heaven until it was over, then she started crying and yelling about the only way I would learn those things is if I was having an affair. I explained but she doesn't believe me. FML

I agree, your life sucks (12312) - you totally deserved it (940)

On 11/19/2009 at 12:16am - intimacy - by anonymous (man) - United States (California)

More FMLs?

pussystroker's life also sucks

Ellen also deserved it

Comments

(-7)

Too many negative votes, comment buried. Show the comment.

first?

#1 - On 11/19/2009 at 6:03am by eyFuckmylife

(0)

DAMN thas all I have to say

#37 - On 01/23/2010 at 8:58am by austinryansmith

(0)

dats funny show her the book

#42 - On 05/12/2010 at 11:47pm by luis420

(-1)

she is neurotic. and I'm sorry you suck in bed.

#2 - On 11/19/2009 at 6:06am by eyFuckmylife

(0)

fuck your wife man if she is so unwilling to believe that you tried to better your sexlife and automatically assumed you cheated. That is seriously messed up. She should be thrilled and extremely grateful that you are so dedicated to her happiness.

#43 - On 07/13/2010 at 5:00pm by fckinbowdown

(0)

Why not just show her the book?

#3 - On 11/19/2009 at 6:06am by crazyarsedfly

(+1)

Yeah, also if she really cared she would've gone off at you during, not after. Obviously selfish.

#19 - On 11/19/2009 at 1:31pm by White667

(+1)

Points to you both.
She should be happy that you took the effort.

#22 - On 11/19/2009 at 8:28pm by DameGreyWulf

(0)

i agree selfish

#34 - On 12/06/2009 at 3:05am by SiKwidit415

(0)

#3, you took the words out of my mouth!

#4 - On 11/19/2009 at 6:25am by Reality_bites

(0)

just show her the book.

#5 - On 11/19/2009 at 6:36am by doggie3

(-1)

Okay. Didn't realy get this one but oh wells. :)

#6 - On 11/19/2009 at 7:14am by stupiddumbblonde

(+1)

you kinda set yourself up for shit with a name like "stupiddumbblonde"
and comments like, "didn't really get this one."

just saying.

#20 - On 11/19/2009 at 6:49pm by music_baby224

(0)

HAHAHAHAHA!!!! I lol'd in RL.

#38 - On 02/01/2010 at 1:00pm by UnearthlyEnemy

(0)

She was saying that he decided to upgrade his lovemaking skills because he is having an affair.

That's not necessarily true -- he could be learning how to drive a woman wild because he wants to have an affair. He's just practicing the new techniques on his tired, old, dried-up wife, so when he meets this hot chick, he can nail it, so to speak.

#7 - On 11/19/2009 at 7:20am by perdix

(0)

He did explain, you should show her. Ha, you suck on bed, oh well!

#8 - On 11/19/2009 at 7:22am by barbud1314

(0)

solution: just have an affair. then you don't need to explain, because she already knows. problem solved.

#9 - On 11/19/2009 at 7:31am by NathanKett

(+2)

You are correct, sir! A woman's mind is not a court of law. If she thinks you are guilty, you are guilty. There is no way to prove your innocence.

So, go have that affair. You're doing the time, so you might as well do the crime.

#17 - On 11/19/2009 at 11:35am by perdix

(0)

Show her the book instead of posting on FML, otherwise F YOUR LIFE!

#10 - On 11/19/2009 at 7:46am by lobby0ne

(0)

you gotta save those tricks for your girlfriend

#11 - On 11/19/2009 at 7:55am by dloc1

(0)

IF you aren't planning on having an affair, I think that's sweet.

Just because he did that doesn't mean he sucks in bed.

#12 - On 11/19/2009 at 8:37am by ellemk

(-1)

you have a stupid wife if she doesn't believe you.. did you show her the book, along the explaination? you seriously didn't pick the brightest one if she still doesn't believe all the proof.. get an affair, at least you'll get accused of something true ;p

#13 - On 11/19/2009 at 9:14am by marc_with_a_c

(0)

Why'd ya let yourself develop boring and predictable moves in the first place, Forrest?

Well, ok - just shut her mouth in heaven.

#14 - On 11/19/2009 at 10:19am by mercyFML

(0)

Silly you, you thought 'insatiable' meant her sexuality. It's actually a womans insecurity. It knows no bounds.
Just tell her to repay you by doing your kinkiest fantasy or she'll have to allow you to find someone who will.

#15 - On 11/19/2009 at 10:28am by kukopia

(0)

What book was it? ;)

#16 - On 11/19/2009 at 11:03am by Roemer

(-1)

Wow yall why u so mad??? This guy wus juxs trying to please his wife more!! I would be delighted if mii bf tried that!!!

#18 - On 11/19/2009 at 1:16pm by EbonyGoddess

(-1)

# 18; If your bf is anything like you, he can't read a whole book.

#26 - On 11/20/2009 at 10:07am by kukopia

(-1)

That's funny stuff, kukopia! Good one.

The good news for her is that those kinds of books feature lots and lots of pictures, so if EbonyGoddess's man has her literacy skill, he'll be OK.

The bad news is that he may use the book as a masturbational aid and leave her high and dry, so to speak.

#27 - On 11/20/2009 at 12:26pm by perdix

(-1)

haaaaaahahaha. that's wonderful.

#29 - On 11/20/2009 at 7:42pm by music_baby224

(0)

what i take away from this is that she thought he must have been cheating because they're clearly not having enough sex for him to get any good at it. sad panda =(

#21 - On 11/19/2009 at 7:51pm by macfarley

(-1)

Just show her the book dumbass. Or fuck with her and say ur bangin a 22 year old with big tits hahahah

#25 - On 11/20/2009 at 7:00am by HXCxSceneKidx

(0)

she's also a bitch and insecure. I know how bad trust problems can be.

#28 - On 11/20/2009 at 5:29pm by eyFuckmylife

(0)

Damn. I wouldn't be surprised if she's one of those people that can't tell you what she what she wants.

#30 - On 11/22/2009 at 3:06am by waterynuggets

(0)

saw that coming

#31 - On 11/23/2009 at 5:37pm by causelifehappens

(+1)

What a george moment

#32 - On 11/25/2009 at 2:40pm by TheFirstUnAntiNo

(0)

show the goddamn book.

show her where you found out how to do this. let it be done.

#33 - On 11/30/2009 at 12:39pm by Senken_

(0)

Wow. you should definitely do what everyone is telling you to do and show her the book.

#35 - On 12/09/2009 at 9:16pm by Kuuga_Rider

(0)

show her the book....

#36 - On 12/16/2009 at 3:21pm by burgydagamer

(0)

what an unappreciative bitch!!! u shouldn't have to show her the book. she should trust that u wouldn't cheat on her...and when u do show her the book deny her that "good lovin" for a month lol she'll learn

#39 - On 02/06/2010 at 7:02am by swkisses5

(0)

Far out! What a psycho! Show her the book and when you finally convince her, use her lack of trust in you to your advantage

#40 - On 02/13/2010 at 2:24am by banacafalata

(0)

Sounds like that book is great, could you mention its send me its name please?

#41 - On 05/01/2010 at 3:03pm by Aizsaule

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