Today, I hooked up with this guy i really like for the first time. After, we were laying in bed listening to music. When the song finished he leaned over and said, "You know what you and that song have in common?" I smiled and said, "What?" He replied with, "You just got played, get out of my bed." FML

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Did you punch him in the balls before you left? What a jerk

awww man

LMAO

Sounds like you've been hit by, you've been struck by a smooth criminal.

omg that's horrible! but so well said ... but horrible! D:

What an idiot, that's sooo mean. I agree with #1, you should have slappd him AND wripped his balls off.

That might be the dorkiest thing I've ever heard. You should have laughed at him and then fell asleep and said you'd leave when you felt like it.

Then peed in his bed.

wow

HOLY FUCKING ASS CRACKERS!!!!!!! Ahahahahaha, that was unexpectedly random and kinda funny!... But overall that's fucked up beyond I don't know wut! Damn, NOONE has a right to put "YDI" on this... Being fair though, we can say he owned you...

I like the "wripped" of #6. It's a sort of writhe/rip combo. Very graphic.

I also like this guy. If I ever get rejected by an asshole, I hope he's as smooth as that.

hahahaha this guy is my hero.

oh and YDI for being a slut also.

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What a douche! Time to find a new crush!

i'm so sorry that happened to you. he's an idiot anyway hun

This sounds like something out of a movie. No one's that smooth in real life.

You should've defiantly peed in his bed.

rofl, THAT WAS GR8. How wonderfully clever of him :'D

You should've kicked his ass...

FYL.

Wow, what a pathetic jerk!

You can tell he was thinking about that one for a long time and waiting for the right moment to pull it out. Haaa.

wow -__-

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
oh man, that's a good one.

#12 sounds fucking chilled out... i want some of that shit.

that's why unless you're dating, you run out of that guy's bed when it's done. they won't know if they're good/bad in bed.

and the way he treated you usually only happens when you give it up too soon.
sorry but that's the truth.
but you should tell all your friends that he was the worst you ever had=T he needs that ego cut down a notch.

Number 7 and number 19 are right. Jeez, that really sucks for you hey. FYL.

Genius, sheer genius.
He probably had that happen to himself, needed an ego boost, used you to do the job. He used the same line and thinks he's hot shit now. Don't get offended by that egotistical jerk. He probably choreographed this whole thing like a lame ass.
But, I have to admit. It's such a good line.

Sorry you had to find out your crush was a jackass in such a manner. As they always say... there are other fish in the sea. Still, FYL.

it's cool, just start telling people what a small dick he has and how he jizzed in seconds. act embarrassed for him, it'll be more believable.

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omfg.
ouchhh!

This guy wanted one thing, and he went out and got it. Just because she likes him, and then fucks him, doesn't mean that it should be a relationship. I applaud the guy for knowing what he wanted and attaining it. However, like 23 said, you probably gave it up way too soon. The guy's a dick, yeah, but you put yourself in the position to get played. Fyl and ydi.

lol #27

You deserve it for being easy!

what a dick

hahahaha sorry but that was pretty clever shit

Definitely should have just laughed at him, and told him that that dumb line was as lame as the sex. Then laughed some more.

I think I can say, with no small degree of certainty, that THAT is the stupidest line I have ever heard. What's the bet that he spent YEARS building up to using it, and got the biggest kick in the world out of it? (which only serves to make him even more of a joke, really...)

what ever happened to nice girls? everytime i read an FML about girls having sex with a "crush" or a "random" that completely screws them over, i feel like they totally deserve it. im not against pre-marital sex but why give it up so soon? its not like there are no guys that would date you if you wont put out or have sex with them. its just kinda sad that its like this. id love to hear a female's reply on this topic. also, i want to make it clear that im not dissing the idea of f$#% buddies as long as there arent feelings involved on either side.

This cannot be the first inkling that this guy was a giant jerk. But of course, you like jerks, don't you? You date jerk after jerk after jerk and you can't figure out why men suck.

I will bet dollars to pesos that you have a friend "who wants to be more". He's nice, he's charming and when you cry about men like this jerk, he's a really good listener. You've told him more than once that "I don't like you that way."

Do yourself a favor and **** that friend like there's no tomorrow. You'll be glad you did. He's been wanting to do it with you for years, and will be very, very good at it. He'll go down on you and won't ask for it back.

That is when you should have said "Yeah OK. I didn't want to hang around till you found out about the herpes anyway" and left.

Honestly, STD jokes never get old.

hahahaha! that rules.

To all the people saying she deserved it for being easy: Being "easy" implies that she just gives it up to whoever's offering, but she made it quite clear that she's known this guy for a while, and has developed feelings for him. Even if she DIDN'T know him that well, if she wants to have sex with him, that's her choice. It doesn't at all make her easy, and she obviously got hurt by this guy, so give her a break.

Um, 41, I don't think anyone said that let alone enough to address "all those people". I think only one comment has been YDI actually..

#42 - check out 23, 30, and 31's comments....

@ 37, a female's reply on this topic.
A girl's not going to write a fml about a guy who doesn't completely screw them over. I don't think any girl, or any person for that matter deserves to be treated like this girl was. Although she did sort of had a one night stand, I completely understand how it would seem logical for her at the time, because she had feelings for him, and thought sleeping with him would show him she likes him. I'm not against pre-marital sex but I am against having sex with someone as a way to start a relationship. There are a lot of guys out there who don't just want sex in a relationship. It's sad a lot of girls think sex is the answer...

and hun, I'm sorry he was such an ass. Move on and find a guy who cares about you. Don't waste any more time on him.

23 didn't say she deserved it, and 30 didn't call her easy and said the guy was a dick. Obviously it is something you put yourself in a position to have happen when you sleep with someone you're not in a relationship in, and that's all they really said. Nothing about her deserving giving it up to whoever is offering and being easy.

So yeah, the one 6 worded response from number 32 doesn't really warrant your response directed at "all those people". Sounds like you're projecting.

-_- Okay then, I'm projecting. My point, however, still stands.

Irrelevantly, but OK.

regardless of how well they knew each other, the guy in question was by definition being just as easy as she. you should treat your sexual partners with respect whether you've been married for 20 years or you just woke up and don't know their name. dude's a dick

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I agree with #19 what a retared...I'm sure he was sitting there planning that shit out for the longest time. Cause there is no way he pulled that outta his ass. He had to sit there and make sure the music was playing and then put it into action. That sucks so bad and what an ass hole. :(

He was probably joking...that was a good one though. And 7, pee in his bed? That would hurt like razor blades if you just had sex

You should have told him that you poked a hole in the condom before hand and/or lied about being on the pill and that you'd be calling him up in a few weeks.

that's just wrong!! girls fall for the worse guys.

#49. Go back to the Fundamentalist Church of Latter Day Saints if you're against modern cultural norms.
Maybe what she did didn't adhere to your ethics, or to other peoples', but even so she deserves the right to pity when she's treated badly. What she did may have been naive, but it's nothing new.
Abstaining doesn't "give" you respect, being a good person is, and given that she appeared truly upset by it I'd suggest she's not some kind of monachronistic slut.

Playa!

I don't want to defend the actions of this dickhead, but what he did was fair game if you didn't make any mention of commitment. Sex is not a contract. I'm not saying that you need to marry the guy like some of the prudes on this website will tell you, but don't sleep with someone right off the bat expecting him to suddenly fall in love with you. FYL and YDI

so you're attracted to assholes? YDI

see, this is why I fear sexual intercourse. that's why I just masterbate like there's no tomorrow.

what song was it?

You probably should of waited a little longer to have sex.

I agree with #56.

But if you are a serial slut like a lot of girls are today, YDI.

ugh what a douchebag! he prob thought he was such a playa saying that line. how lame!!!! you can do better

Awe that really sucks
Ive never had sex but i dont plan on waiting till marriage
But i know that when i do, i dont want to feel like i shouldnt have done iy
Id have done the same thing as you, i guess im naive like that but if i liked him and he was showing interest i would have slept with him
It sucks that you got played tho

(if you want to learn about guys and the way they pick up chicks, buy the book 'mystery method' and if you want one that goes into more detail about it buy 'the game'
Both of these books are very interesting, and i found literally EVERYTHING in those books to be true! Pick them up!)

FYL! :(

Get him back.
Go for the knees!!!

LMFAO..too jokes

Going with #56.

Don't be a slut if you cry over stuff like this? The more you know.

Omg... that's so harsh! I'd punch him in the balls and then cry.

Having sex with this guy doesn't necessarily make her a slut, you don't know if she's been going out with him for a long time before doing it. No matter what the situation is, he's still a dickhead for saying that.

I hope you kicked his balls, good and hard.

Next time you see him, start to giggle and show your pinky to your friends. Or just look at your pinki like it reminds you of smthing, just make sure the bastard see what you are doing and sooner or later he'll get the point :)

You got PWNT.

YDI for putting out way too early.

oh my god!!! what an asshole :(. here's what you do....spread a rumor about how small his dick was and how he wanted you to play with his butthole. It'll eventually get back to him, scar him for life and ruin his rep :) lol

I...Laughed cause it reminds me of a RP scene.
Oher than that..... I would have been really depressed. WOW. Did you slap him?

Puns are always funny

Lol @ #4.

First there is no indication on this FML that this was a one night stand or a first meetup that ended up in sex. So if you dont know dont speculate.

Second, the way that dude responded to her, shows what a douchebag that person is (the dude), usually men that abuse women like that have inferiority complexes because they were either molested by a family member or they hav been beaten to death by an alcoholic daddy.

Thirdly, to the OP, lesson learned, be more offensive next time during dating it helps. Oh and always carry mace, that way if the dude results a jackass you can peppermint spray his balls. My friend had an encounter like that and peppermint spray does wonders on people's testicles.

I agree with #38. Usually, there are signs for the real character. But one notices them only when one *wants* to see them at all...

Anyway, that line was awesome! Cruel, yes, but awesome ;)

Nasty!

You don't deserve this. Anybody saying you deserve it for "being a slut" or putting yourself in a position to get harmed is mind-bogglingly dumb. A. Sleep with whomever you want to. B. Not taking this sort of risk is really stupid. Anyway, at least you found out what an asshole he is now instead of months from now.

lol #4!!
but aw thats really mean :( get revenge!

It was just a booty call, leave it at what it is. You both had a good time, now move on!

again... lol @ 4. XD

#51 must have STDs. It hurts like RAZOR BLADES to take a piss after sex? What the fuck? No it doesn't.

so why is it HER fault for "giving it up" early but not his? b/c men are expected to be pigheaded jerks and use women, therefore it's ok? Newsflash: women like sex, too! We're not "giving" shit up when we screw you, we're getting in return. And why is everyone so quick to use terms like "easy" and "slut"? That means anyone could get in her pants, and obviously that's not true, she chose this one guy. And why is it that women can only screw ppl they're in relationships with, so that they can be sure they won't be screwed over? Personally, i wouldn't want to start a relationship w/ someone before I knew if they were good in bed. I do agree that sex is a bad way to start a relationship, or to think that just because you screwed that it's going somewhere, but stop imposing your morals of who's allowed to screw who and who can get away with what. Let's hold the guys responsible for once for being "easy."

OP, i'm sorry that this guy was such a jerk, but maybe if you can get over your feelings for him, you can get a good fuck buddy out of it? or just find someone else, you've obviously got it in u :-)

ilu # 84.

Tough luck, lesson learned, don't give it up so easy next time. Actually get to know the person before having sex with them.

Its not so much her fault as much as she should know better. Sure, sleep with with a guy you don't know on your night out for some fun, but this was someone she liked. She should've been a little more careful about him. Women get more emotionally invested in sex to begin with (that's not me being sexist or anything, its scientifically proven), so she probably should've been a little less quick to hop in the bed than he was.

And yeah, he was an f-ing asshole.

OWNED.

Many people sleep with someone they liked "for a really long time" and you happened to get duped. He's a dickwad and I'm sorry that you thought knowing him for a long time meant "knowing" him. If you want to, maybe writing about what kind of person he is, what he did, etc. as a warning for other people would be fine. It's not slander if it's true *shrugs*. Just a thought.

wow im sorry what an asshole

LOL I wonder how long he's been rehearsing that in his head before he said it. I'm sorry, though. He sucks.

lol I agree with #39! He's a dick and thinks he's in a film.

you know what? after reading all the comments and seeing how some people are reacting to the fact that this girl slept with this dude that she clearly wasn't dating?
SO FUCKING WHAT?
I don't get how its okay for guys to be sluts and not girls. Do guys magically not get STDs? Is sex somehow different emotionally for guys?
NO. Society just TELLS them it's different.
Not that I'm calling this girl a slut, because I think its refreshing when a woman is aggressively in charge of her sex life. I just think its RIDICULOUS how girls that have pre-marital sex are sluts and guys who fuck a new chick every week get a pat on the back.

When he said that, u should've been like "fine, but u mite wanna be careful and get urself checked-it sux to have AIDS"

lmaoo
omg thats so mean, but funny at the same time :|
geez asshole much!?

wow, i would have cried, that really sucks.
i hope you punched him in the balls.

What a fucker. Hope he gets herpes from a whore he tries to play like he did to you.

my god!!!! just give that loser an effin slap!!!!!!

Wow he had like 3 minutes and could only come up with that, douche. You should have replied that unlike the song he did not have rhythm, timing or last 3 minutes - that way you take the ownership back.

Should of asked him for a REWIND/REPLAY Then you could of EJECTED.

Thats when you reply.. I just got played? You know I'm HIV+ right?

#37

I completely agree.

Sorry, darlin'. Better luck next time?

The reason that girls are considered sluts and guy aren't is because the more sex a woman has the looser her vagina gets. Nobody likes a loose vag so nobody likes a slut. The more sex a guy has the better he gets and the longer he lasts.

#101 and #103 both idiots, oh no wait same

I'm sorry but you deserved it. A guy you really like and you had sex with him. 1) Fail. 2) If you did like him, you'd know he was a player. 3) Fail again.

ou, harsh of him.. FYL

i hope you ripped of his balls and chocked him with them =]

#38, amen. Amen.

mean, but pwnd.

YDI...should have kept those legs closed lol

ouch, lmao

LMAO #4!!!!!!!

your reply should have been " you also have been played... the song goes like thiss.. i have std's... now you have std's... this song can be replayed all you want" and then punch him in the balls

That is sooooooooooooo messed up
you should have kicked him in the balls, slapped, and destroyed his room a little (or a lot depending on what the tone was that he used to tell you to leave)

Also he just made it worse for himself..... if any that you know likes him you could completely ruin his chances with them by telling them what he did.

But i feel bad for you, sorry that must suck.
I also agree with #113

Whadda asshole.
he's probably done that EXACT same thing
to hundreds of girls. I agree with #107.

Tell people he has a small penis.

It is the only solution.

Oh, and #99, you are a genius.

I hope he didn't come inside you as well....

plus I hope he gets jinxed and like get his thing cut off by some random witch he sleeps with or worse!

#99~ brilliant! :'D

I agree with all the other people on here.
You shouldn't have given it up to a boy that you only 'really liked'. Especially if the feelings weren't really mutual.
What did happen to females at least waiting a while instead of being easy?
In the same aspect, I hope you kicked him so hard in the balls that he puked blood.

Ahahah. Sorry man, but I think that guy is awesome. What a funny line XD

P.S I'm a chick.

LoL @ #4

that was sweet how you slid that in, man.

OMG !! :O what a loser, kick him in the balls

ouch that' harsh. i woulda ball tapped him before i rolled out.

#11 you're an ass. And how does this make her a slut? She slept with a guy she liked, not some random person.

You should fuck that guy up. Spread rumors that he has a tiny penis and doesn't even know how to use it.

Ow. What a bastard. This is why men have balls; so we can kick them when they piss us off.

well really, maybe next time you'll wait till you're at least DATING the guy to get into bed with him.... sigh... what has this world come to?

I am so sorry. I like the way he said it though. But the same thing happened to me in a way. I had sex with a guy that I like and we said that we wouldnt tell anyone then my friend (who is also friends with him) found out. He asked her out after having sex with me, so she yelled at him.

He then tries to act like I am the one that did wrong, even though he used me!

I'm in the same boat as you and this boat sucks!!

hit it and quit it!
oooooops

You should have said "how did I get played if I just gave you the HIV?"

burn

Agree w/ #23. Why would you sleep with him if you're not dating? Your not a slut and didn't deserve this, but try to aim a little higher, please. Dudes like that are a dime a dozen....all talk and little dick. (ie the poster that said "this dudes my hero" lovely jerkoff) Try to find a guy that won't "play" you.

My hate for men? Just increased 1000%.

I hope you junkpunched him before you got out of his bed.

wow, what a jerk. im sorry, thats happened to me before too. youll get over it, but try not to let yourself get into that again.

best line...... EVAR

#84 is the best, and why is it that when girls have sex a lot we're considered sluts even around our friends but when guys have sex a lot they're considered "the man" or "champions" or what ever the fuck you guys call them? I'm not trying to say that everyone should randomly start fucking each other now but it's really completely unequal.

What a fucking faggot.

though that sucks for you, that's pretty damn original on his part. i hope he said he was joking after. if he wasnt, hes just a douche.

I love how many people automatically assume he's the only ass in the picture. I can tell you if it was me, I would have had a damn good reason for using a line like that on someone. I doubt this was an accident.

Also, all the people creating these sad story scenarios for this girl... You don't know her. Whether she's a slut or a poor victim of a clever asshole, take it for what it was. She got played. If you are with a guy and can't tell if he's a player or not, then you're dating/fucking too soon. Simple as that.

Kudos to him for being memorable. And BOO on ya'll who think lying about his dick or telling him he has an std now is a good idea. THAT is childish and stupid, and if you didn't seem like a slut before you do now cause that means YOU had it FIRST. Also opens you up for the hotdog in a hallway recourse.

Think before you fuck.

FYL, but YDI for having sex with him before knowing him enough to know he's a jerk or even MORE YDI if you did know he was a jerk and STILL had sex with him.

whoever said YDI is a douche

shank his ass

You'll be back. Chick love guys who act like jerks, especially right after they've had sex. You'll wonder what is wrong with you, develop a complex, and become obsessed with him. And when he finally calls to tell you to come over and have sex with him again, you'll be there in a heartbeat.

He knows what he's doing.

Ha, word for word copy paste http://www.youcantfuck.com/?p=72 and that was pasted there before here looks like... Looks like a LOT of the new fmls are from that site... and it doesn't seem related to me, anyone if it is?

YDI... you had sex with a guy you "liked" and it turned out badly? no shit it did.

YDI

keep spreading those legs

see where it gets you

ouchhh.

LMFAO! He's clever

and if she didnt have sex she'd be a prude.

oh but the guys not a slut because he just gut laid then acted like a douche. wtf!?!?!

and he might of seemed nice to her so she didnt know he was an asshole

and she liked (past tence) him shes not having sex with guys she didnt know. shes not a slut


so stop all these unfair YDI's

its totally not her fault

oh wow to all the people thinking that's smooth. that is such a lame line.

I hope you were wearing heels that day and stabbed his nuts with em.

#37, female response: whatever happened to nice guys? How many times have you heard about a guy cheating on the girl he was dating because she wouldn't have sex with him? Do you consider the guy who sleeps with crushes and has random hooks up a slut, or just the girl? It's really a two way street,hun.

ROFLOLMAO!!!( thats a combo of rofl lol and lmao btw)

At least you're free of that jankoff.

#4 is the fucking king.

#84 is prolly true.

The story as a whole is sad and I truly feel it is a worthy FML, however; his line was hysterical!

I'm sure if he can't find anyone else in the next few weeks that he'll apologize and try to sleep with you again and then you can throw that line back in his face.

#4! BAHAHA!

That sucks.
I'd burn his dick off.
O_O
Ohhh the things I would do to that man if it was me.
Oh did i say man?
I meant childish boy.

Bahahhahahaha.

Totally Pwned.

You shoulda been like..what, you thought I was gonna come back after that performance?

Then go to school and tell everyone he has a tiny penis and sucks in bed. =]

I want to hi five that guy.

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That's horrible. I kinda agree with the guys telling you to look out for a nice boyfriend for a change. I don't even mean the ones who have been just friends and not had the guts to show romantic interest. Why were you attracted to this guy at all instead of someone sincere? Seriously, find a nice one. Jerks like this will make you cynical.

you post fmls every day. get a life and stop lying.

#99 that was awesome :o)

that sucks. ):

Jackassery aside, that's a pretty good zinger.

I hope you left him with a bloody nose.

#7 ahahahaha
what a jerk, hope you had a good comeback though cuz you better not have just gotten up and left,
you could've said, "That was a pathetic line but i don't wanna get played again so...take his stereo//or whatever u used to play the music and chuck it out the window."

you should of pointed and laughed at his penis and said it was the worst lay ever

a little too much info,# 58.

That guy is a champion.

that's actually really clever.

What the hell... I hope you used a condom. This guy sounds high risk for god-knows-what diseases. Not only is he a whore, but he's a jackass. Find someone better.

LOL kudos to him, that was a good one. No worries, he's probably done the same thing to 23 other girls before you.

Poor you. Pick who you sleep with wisely next time.

hahahhahahahahhahahahhahahahahhahahahah

You should have said "Well, do you know what you and the ocean now have in common?" CRABS!

How could you have ever liked a douche like him?
You should get to know people better.

OH SNAP! That's harsh, real harsh.

should have waited for marriage silly girl...

Try to find a way into the law, where that's actually some crime, and he goes to jail and gets his fat ass raped everyday.

He should be outlawed from sex all together. We don't need anymore douche bag offspring to walk this earth. There's already an overpopulation of them.

agree with #1, you should have punched him in the balls...agree with #178 as well, wish that'd be possible though

Hes a boss.

at least he didnt say dont come back another time :)) maybe the playlist was on repeat

aahhhh. ahahahah wow.
that sucks.
im sorry.
hes an asshole..
forget about him.
oh and i hope you slapped him or something.
:D

what a douche packer! be careful who you sleep with

Why are people always complaining about girls being sluts??? A lot of guys are sluts, but we don't worry about it. Screw him... hopefully he'll get a venereal disease. Ditch him and find a decent guy...

That's... That's fucking terrible. D:

He's an ass hole. You should get a new, better boy friend and get him to beat this guy up.

WTF what a JERK

That's fucked up. Key his car if he owns one. If not, find something else of his to vandalize.

Wow, the level of assholeness astounds me.
Please tell us you did something back at him. D:

#4 FTW!

Anyway, I have trouble finding sympathy for FMLs like this involving liking and getting involved with a jerk. Chances are, all these guys aren't complete Jekyll and Hydes who give every indication of being wonderful, worthy guys but suddenly turn evil without warning. There had to be some indication that the guy is a real jerk. I know too many girls who just love these awful guys and then don't understand why they do hurtful things. I'll never understand why people get into relationships like that. I blame Twilight.

omg... im so sorry
u should have kicked his ass right there
u should have should that dickhead who he was messing with

that rimjob is gonna get his ass kicked someday :) i think u should go back and kick his ass NOW!!!

lol thats awesome :P

Ya he's a dick. but u let him do that by being so easy. he is a jerk but you are too easy and it's your own fault.

I would have kicked his ass so hard, he'd be forever known as the jackass who got himself beat down by a girl for being such a prick. We'd see how much "play" he got then.

LOL what a pathetic moron.

You should've laughed your ass off with that stupid line. Seriously, what's with guys' brains?

hahahahahaaa

Call him up in two or three weeks telling him you think you're pregnant and he's the father. Make it absolutely clear that abortion isn't an option. How long you want to keep up the charade is your call.

Theres millions of reasonably attractive nice guys in the world like me, yet women continue to date and have sex with complete retards like this. Women are stupid.

I'd be like, "You know what you have in common with my dog? Your balls are about to be castrated. Fucker"

What an asshole! This is exactly why girls don't want to date anyone! Because they're either dicks or they are fucking ugly.

FYL, indeed.

LOL @ 4

I'm sorry. :/ You shoulda donkey punched him in the gut.

what a dick, but im srry, thats a pretty amazing line

you can't be mad at that...thats fucking hilarious and original

yep, he's a keeper

haha that is hella funny

I don't care if it's a one night stand, friends with benefits, or whatever. Nobody should be treated like that. If they're kicking you out right after with such ridiculous behavior/comments, it tells you a lot about the person.

that man is my hero

I don't think I've ever laughed this hard at a FML before. xD This is great.

You should have slapped him. What an ass. That's horrible.

Hahaha. Clever.
But terrible at the same time. I'm sorry.

that kid has probably been waiting years to pull that off...so i congratulate him....what a prick tho lol hhaha

Please, please, please, I'm begging you: tell everyone you both know that he has a little penis. Tell them that he has a little penis, and that he was so scared of your judgment that he couldn't get hard, and that he cried and screamed at you to get out of his bed because he was so embarrassed. Then laugh a knowing laugh at him every single time you ever see him again. Ever.

Umm I want to say that I feel bad for but honestly you deserved it.

#158 So what if he made her cry? It was a horrible thing to say. Dont go calling her a slut. Many girls will have sex with a guy because they have a crush on him. It does not make them a slut.

Do you even know the definition of slut?

Look it up online.

#176 why would you wait till marriage. Look how this guy treated her. Why would you want to marry someone that comes from that gender.

Why buy the pig when all you need is a little sausage.

#178 I totally agree with you.

#199 If you make yourself known then women would date you. You have to show them that you really are nice and you will treat them well.

#215 No body deserves that.

well think about it this way, he probably spent the whole time trying to come up with a good joke, which was lame yet funny, IRONY, sooo hes pathetic, but at least you got laidd.

Oh that's win... Imma do that. ^.^

LIE!!!

That's an old joke!

men are assholes

im a girl, and even i say that's what you get for being a whore. call it a learning experience, and keep your legs together. problem solved.

ROFLcopterrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

#4
i love you.

you should've said, "Well, do you know what you and that song have in common ? You both are a one-hit wonder." and proceed by giving him the hardest junk-punch in history. :]

#7 is right, but u should have just peed his bed and curse him out. Yeah and the few ppl who said they liked the guy I agree with u. That dude was smooth man. Must have been a really sexy guy.

But I do feel bad for u. Gee I would have gotten him back somehow.

I bet that'll teach you not to have one-night stands anymore. Don't be easy and maybe you wont end up with a-holes.

ROFL get owned :P

what a jerk, I feel your pain...

wow...that sounds like something that would only be said in a movie...

wow...that sounds like something that would only be said in a movie...

#221- you're a bitch. She liked the guy, and he was an asshole, but you blame her? This is what's wrong with society... Guys get away with everything because "boys will be boys," and girls are forced to feel like shit when they do something even remotely risque, and they're called whores by women and men alike. Screw that. Everybody needs to be held accountable for their actions. She should have read him better, and he shouldn't be allowed to breed because he's an idiot and we have enough stupid people running around. Quit judging, because I'd rather be a whore than a complete and total asshole like you and this douchebag guy.

that's a hilarious line.

#221 apparently has less of a brain than a sex life.
#226 she's easy because a guy that she's liked for awhile wanted to have sex with her and she complied? Stop being a nun.

Honestly, I would have said "Fuck you" and gotten comfortable. What a douchebag.

I cried after reading this...
Not kidding.

HAHA i would be so happy if a guy said that to me... he seems amazing :)

Aww. That sucks.
No one deserves that. :(

"You know what your virility and the song have in common? They're both over."
Then you stomp on his beanbag.

This is probably one of the most f-ed up FMLs on here. The fact that this dude was the OP's crush just makes it worse. If it was a drunk one-night-stand with a stranger, I'd probably just laugh.

shoulda punched him in the balls, but wow you got owned.

OMG thats awesome, i almost pissed myslef lol

CUT OFF HIS TESTICLES!

clever

LOL I bet he waited his whole life to say that to someone.
but he's a dick :[

Sex is not for someone you like, it's for someone who shares the feelings you have for him/her. You can't use sex as a way to make males like you. It doesn't work. You can go ahead and act on your feelings, but if you're not in a relationship, you put your heart at risk like this. I mean, he's just a crush, a guy you like. That doesn't mean he's the right person to sleep with.

Think about it. Even with birth control, you can still get pregnant. Nothing is 100% Even 99%, that means 1 in 100 get pregnant. You have to evaluate each time you sleep with a man if he's someone you'd be comfortable fathering your child. Will he be there? Will he be a good father? Can he help provide? It's not just a physical act. You have to take the choice far more seriously than just "I like him."

If you sleep with someone who's not committed to you in any way, you're displaying a lack of respect for yourself because you're putting yourself at risk for a lay.

And the reason people don't care as much that males sleep around is because they have way less to worry to about:
1. AIDS is more easily transmitted from male to female than female to male
2. Men don't get pregnant
3. If they get a woman pregnant, they'll get stuck with child support, yes, but the woman will get stuck with the pregnancy, delivery, care AND financial side. So it's more reckless for a woman to sleep around.

Be careful who you give the opportunity to breed, man.

woww, what an asshole, even if u did put out too soon, he didnt have to be a jerk and say that to you, i hope you punched him in the balls, and i agree with #242, he definatly heard that before and was waiting for someone to say it too

Odd... so the girl who has sex with a guy who she's liked for a long time is morally reprehensible somehow, according to a lot of posters, but ... the guy who goes through random girls like a hot knife through butter and then enjoys himself hurting their feelings is a funny and cool dude.

Oh that's right though, I forgot, good women stay virgins so that after we've had our fun with the wild ones we can marry them and a) be sure that no other children are around to challenge inheritance of any joint property and b) not know if we're bad in bed, thus leaving us to do our own housework.

Bloody hell and I thought we gave women equal rights a while ago, apparently that's only in name...

Yo, fuck. That dude should go to hell.

#4..hilarious!

#11...so the guy isn't a slut too? don't be jealous 'cuz YOU don't get any!!

All I can say is that you just be the world's worst at picking men. Every friend I've ever had in my life would NEVER treat a woman that way - even ones that they knew were with a one-night stand. I can't even imagine the depths of your poor decision-making with "guys you really like".

whats OP AND YDI mean?
and what was the song



but yeah hes an asshole
you werent being easy you thought you knew him cuz you liked him
you should have been a lil more careful

idiot.
I wonder if he had some other lines to use in case there was no music

maybe you shouldn't have sex with someone you're not dating exclusively.

lmao #4 one of the best comments on here.

Why is it that when a girl has sex with someone she's not dating, she's a slut.
BUT when a guy has sex with someone he's not dating, he gets praised by all his guy friends for "getting ass".
MEN SUCK.

Well....

...you DID.

Did you smash his balls?

damn girl. Did you at least kick his balls or something?
Cause if i were you, i would of kicked him real hard.

HAHA #4

OOOOOOOO SHIT

OMG!
Did you punch him in the dick!
If a guy I had sex with just said that and wasn't kidding, he would be seriously hurt!

Fuck, what a douche.

Fuck that douche. you should castrate him.

#151, thanks for the reply. unfortunately, i would consider myself one of those nice guys. im not trying to look like a saint, but im an awful lot like the guy that #38 described. im actually proud of the fact that ive never had any "random sex" or anything like that. i think sex should be had between 2 people that feel very strongly for one another. also, i think cheating is one of the worst things anyone can do to someone else and i could not imagine ever doing it. and yea, i do actually question some of my guy friends that have random sex like that. i dont use the term "slut" when describing guys like this, its usually termed "man-whore."

sucks, thats why you don't have sex with people who aren't your bf or anything =/

what an assshole! i would punch the shit outta him then cuss him out!

you should of said ok bye. oh and just so you know i have herpes. have fun with outbreaks!

Dude if girl though like this..this world would become to nice..things would go to smooth and girls would get bored! girls "mature" faster than guys they are way above dating the nice guy! Jerks are way better choice!

"This cannot be the first inkling that this guy was a giant jerk. But of course, you like jerks, don't you? You date jerk after jerk after jerk and you can't figure out why men suck.

I will bet dollars to pesos that you have a friend "who wants to be more". He's nice, he's charming and when you cry about men like this jerk, he's a really good listener. You've told him more than once that "I don't like you that way."

Do yourself a favor and **** that friend like there's no tomorrow. You'll be glad you did. He's been wanting to do it with you for years, and will be very, very good at it. He'll go down on you and won't ask for it back."

I would've socked him in the eye and ripped off his balls. FYL for liking a jackass.

its awful and i dont condone it but damn hes slick and 2 cmnts up from me i think i love you no homo

LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!

Ok, either you knew him for awhile and got exactly what you wanted, or you didn't really know him that long and got what you deserved. Bottom line. If you knew him for awhile, like other people have said, this wouldn't have been the first sign he's shown that he's a dick, thus you got what you wanted. If you didn't know him very long, like other people have said, you gave it up way too easy and you got what you deserved. Either way I have no sympathy for you.

Excuse my language, but what a douchebag!
You know what really grinds my gear?! Lindsay Lohan jk but assholes like that w a good one liner

I don't know why this would bother you since you obviously wanted to go to bed with him.

i would have grabbed him by the balls and made him apologize! haha

aww that sucks..what an ass!

i agree with #267.. .girls complain about guys but at the same time they are always hanging around the jerks and the guys the guys that are in this FML. Girl deserved this one.. She should know who to do it with.

the double standards here are absolutely disgusting. so she's a slut but he isn't? ridiculous.

LOL! funny stuff

Wow, what a way to drop the bomb.

sounds fake
that would suck tho

Jeeezus!! What a wanker..

Leave this a week or so then send him a note saying that on your doctors recommendation he should get an AIDS test... (*will give him some *panic* focus for a while).

I'm sorry but this one was really funny. I laughed out loud. For a while

But wow. WHAT A TOOL. I hope karma gets that guy some day.

That guy is my new best friend

For this to have happened, you had to have slept with him before you were in a relationship so YDI. Now if you had waited until there was an actual relationship (and your wording makes it clear there was nothing between the two of you) than I would say FYL, but come on "sex with the guy you like" - how did you not expect something like this to happen?

D:

i remember moderating this yesterday this is funny what a comment number 4 cracked me up

Ow, that's harsh. FYL.

that crush of yours is such a dick.

what an ass.
hope you punched him in the balls or something, guy fucking deserved it. gives the rest of us a bad rep

you should have castrated him. if you didn't. go do it. he doesn't deserve the love of his balls. Considering what he did, he deserves every bit of crap coming his way.

#37, please jump off a bridge. SEX IS ENJOYABLE. GIRLS CAN ENJOY SEX, TOO. I swear to god the comment section on this site is like a time warp to 1925.

I agree with #36, he's probably been saving that bit for months, maybe even years, and then decided to go for it and use it with you... And even though some think you've put out too soon, fact is when you really like a guy you barely stop to think about trivial things like consequences when he's making you feel like he's also into you. I don't think any girl deserves to be played, especially when they're putting themselves emotionally out there. However you should have built up your pride again with some clever comeback like #224 said about the song and the virility, good one! :]

i'd say he's used that line before.

you should've said:
"you know what YOU and that song have in common? You both lasted 3 minutes."
Then roll over and go to sleep

#293, if he didn't last 3 minutes then that wouldn't make sense at all... thus she would make a fool out of herself.

230 and 232 are clearly bitter sluts that have sought love through sex without success. If girls want to have sex like men, then they need to cut the emotional bs (like men). Trying to sleep your way into a relationship is a good way to get hurt, pregnant, and diseased. Men have relationships in order to get sex, and women have sex in order to get relationships. Obviously, my logical take on this situation is inflamatory to girls who haven't figured out that sex and relationships are not one and the same. Don't get me wrong, I love sex, but I also love myself enough to know that when a guy cares more about an orifice than the wonderful person to which it's attached, it's time to pack up your vagina and leave.

hahahaha 296 is epic.

wow, whattta playaaa

you should have acted all non chalet and been like "k, well ill just go and fuck my boyfriend peaceout"
hehe

Bahahaha, you gotta admit, that's a pretty friggen hilarious way to get dumped.

I would have burned his nuts off with a lighter.


Men like that make the world a shitty place. I bet he was one of those pricks who blows his load after thrusting 2 times. Hahaha.

Maybe you shouldnt have sex with eminem

If I were you I would have said, "WELL, NOW YOU HAVE HERPES."


Then hit him in the balls before leaving. :)

thats so sad !! wat an asshole he shouldnt do you like that !! :/

Slut.

#4 wins.

Wow this actually made me sad, poor you. :(

I hope you don't get depressed by this scene and if you are get over it, he not worth it. He's a scum of the earth. I just hope he gets what he deserves.

BRILLIANT!!

awww! :[

LMAO. That's funny.

That's hilarious!

hahahahahaha that's a good one

I feel for you hun, it's not a YDI or FYL. You do what you want with your life, just be careful :)

it was your stupid fault for having sex with the him in the first place.
dumbass.
get a life, sex freak.

#294 its an exaggeration meaning to say that he didnt last as long as maybe some of her other sex partners in the past have. Even if he fid last a long time its meant to make him feel insecure.
Get a brain.

awww... I'm sorry... he is an asshole

i hope you ripped his dick off. & if you didn't you should next time you see him. & #314 you're an ass.

LMFAO i'm sorry that was a horrible thing to do but you shouldn't have slept with him in the first place...i wonder how long it took him to come up with that :P

What a douche, I'd never treat a lady that way.
Soooooo.... can you post pics?

sooo that guy is a fucing docheeee i wud personallly kicked him in the fucking balls she could have kids and fuckup some other girl he deserves and good kickk fucking asshole

WHAT AN DOUCHHEE
!!!!!!!

Awwww...... I so wanna hurt people like that sorry hope u kicked his balls real hard befor u left

One word: douche.

Hahaha;; omfg you just got f**kin' played!!! :)
You must be some slut to sleep with him hahah!
Holy s**t i can't stop laughing! Hahaha!
Btw;; what was that song called?
;)

that is messed up and it hurts i hope you got dressed and act like it did not bother you and kick the s*** out of him and leave. he will get his i believe in karma!

Im going to have to remember that one lol

#289, i am fully aware that girls enjoy sex. i have no problem with having sex purely for the enjoyment, but people who end up having sex just for the enjoyment dont end up writing FMLs like this. F#$%ing duh! She had feelings for him. if you have feelings for someone, you should be sure that some sort of commitment is made by the person before having sex. if there arent any feelings involved, then feel free to have whatever sex you want

wow.
that is just f'ed up.
whatta fag.
sorry :( I definetly know how that feels to be played & find out in a really harsh way.
&& I think most girls do.

lmao @ 190
I blame 99% of the world's problems on Twilight as well.

YDI for letting yourself get owned so hard.

And all the feminist crazies: if the guy were posting that the girl had done the same thing, it'd be just as much of an own.

That guy wins the day.

Yay @ #7

Btw, I'd have also told people his name.

Maybe girls shouldn't only date/have sex with douchebags.

Calling fake, real people don't talk like that.

Or, if they do and you're still claiming to have liked the guy for a while prior to this, then YDI for wanting such a jackass in the first place.

LMFAO!!!!!!

Owned, that was hilarious, FYL indeed.

lmao that guys hela beast.......sorry for that happening tho FYL.

i agree with number 7

c´mon, you are sleeping around.... what did you expect????

#103 - You're an idiot. Check your facts before you post and perpetuate false information.

#1 - A few weeks after the fact, with lots of drama and emotion, inform him that you are pregnant.

#2 - Tell him to tell NO ONE, while you decide if you should carry the 'baby' or not. This is VERY important for later - also you DONT TELL ANYONE about your plan.

#3 - Let him suffer for a few days...weeks - its up to you how long you drag out his suffering.

#4 - When you feel he's had enough, tell him that 'you had a miscarriage, and you could always try again if he really wanted to be a daddy...'

#5 - This is where keeping the 'story' between the two of you comes in to play. After a few days tell him, however you want to, that the 'pregnancy' was payback for him being a dick. Then when he freaks out and tells people, deny that you ever told him you were pregnant, make it look like he is making the whole thing up to cover up for the fact that he was bad in bed.

Mission accomplished. Good Luck.

lol. YDI for not knowing he was such a prick before sleeping with him.

hahaha. Thats a big lol, and it sucks!

That kid is a Boss

slut + douchebag = lethal combination. I can only hope neither of you plans on breeding. oh, who am I kidding. Most of the young western population is made up of sluts and douchebags.

Perfect execution! Flawless!

omg sucks sucks suck

clever line though

wow... I agree with almost every comment on here...

You're obviously a slut; he's obviously a duche bag. I don't think you deserved that, though... he needs a good punch in the balls before you leave the bed :p

that sounds very fake

Hahahahaha wow.... talk about worst moment ever.... you should of told him that he sucks in bed.

ydi, why would you sleep with someone you are not even dating?

You probably need some practice in bed.
He only wanted one thing, and he didn't quite like what he got.(ASS HOLE)
This has happened to a few of my friends.
Don't take it seriously...Watch some porno's and learn some new moves. And then go after his best friend.

LOL that'll teach him

O SHIT that suks so bad but that was a good saying though not gon lie

:O

what he said was good in essence, but WHAT A BITCH. that was really harsh.

WIN.

Hahahaha!!!! What a badass! Oh I can't wait to use this line! Reminds of a family guy episode.

Woman - Quagmire, I have a question. What do you do for a living?
Quagmire - I have a question for you. Why are you still here?

That said, sucks to be you

Wow. You sure can tell who the boys are in all these comments. And I do mean "boys."

#27, you rock!

#32, says the girl who's profile is a pic of her showing off her cleavage. Hypocrite.

#38 i agree 100%

That fuckking asshole jrk! I hope he dies in his sleep. I am sure u are a beautifil person and u dont deserve that at all. that just makes me so mad people do that.

You know what you do?
Kick him in the testicles.
And while he's in pain, you snap a photo with anything that has a camera (phone, actual camera, etc.)
You then proceed to take a photo of his tiny penis.
Then you log onto Facebook, Twitter, Photobucket, Flickr, etc. Whatever you may have.
And you post the pictures on each website.
You know. Just for fun.
And maybe as a bonus, write his home adress, phone numbers with area code and his email.
Just a thought.

Fyl huge.

but on the other hand u did have sex with him and why would a guy want a relationship with a girl who puts herself out there like that? u should have said no. But he shouldnt have been a jerk. i do hope to god u used protection... but next time think more carefully before u have sex with someone u do not know that well, it doesnt matter if u like them.... get to know them and have a relationship with them before u decide to have sex with them.

OMG please tell me you beat his ass

LMAO. ahhhhh i will use that over and over

i wud have askd him 2 69 with me b4 I left, made sure his mouth was open and peed in his mouth and all over his face. (should have put on most of my clothes first so i cud run out in time)

motherfucker!!!!
he's a pig and you can fuck his bestie! :P!
in the mean time........you have eggs and know where his house is, right? egging is fun!

Kick him int he balls, he deserves worse than that or find a whore with a disease to give to him if he doesn't already have one. Hope you have better experiences with men down the line.

oh wow. If i were you i'd start cracking up loudly. I'd laugh myself out of there.

so did u kick his ass??
if not then you SHOULD!!!!!!!!
wow can any one spell heartless???

im sorry....but i laughed when i read this.
then i laughed even harder when i read #39 and #52
and i completely agree with #84.

Wow, I feel bad for you. And all those people who are saying you gave it up too easy don't even know...you never specifically said you just met him and banged him..jeez.

get tested.
he sounds like a dumb whore to me.
you never know what THOSE kinds of people could have.

omg jerk :OO
thats horrible :S

Now, that's a total jerk. I wish same thing could happen to him someday. Karma is a bitch dude.

hilarious ... he is a dick, but that is still hilarious.

Hahahahahahahaha !! What a legend.

obvs she didnt desevrve it, but man, im pretty sure i musta laughed for ten minutes solid. oh and another thing, id like to say who gives a flying fuck if this girl want to have sex with someone she liked, she obvs didnt know he was a prick, and why is erry one talking about morals, sluttyness, their theories of pre-marital sex, and all these "well, if this is blah blah blah," you dont know how the shit went down so stop pretending like you do , i mean, NO ONE GIVES A FUCK. ,

That's a funny line but Im' sure that hurt you real bad. THat really sucks sweetie, I'm so sorry, but at least you now know what a dick face he is and can avoid him.

You should have turned your face towards him , smiled briefly and said "Whew , that makes things wayy easy" and could've followed it up with "i probably couldn't fake it another time" if he's too dumb to get it indirectly ....

dickheads like him should get an erectile dysfunction , wish there was some black magic thingie to do that .....

punch that bitch

why did you not cut his dick off? he sucks.

ahahahah , that was fucked up but pure genius. hella funny

hahaa this made me laugh.
YDI for being a skank and banging a guy you don't really know.
skank.

hahaha, dammn that sucks! FYL.
but cheers to that comment, its hilarious.

haha
ok wow sucks for you !

What a dick, uhh yeah, that's the word for it. dick

OH!
i would too.
in fact i would squeeze his penis really hard.

Hahahaha love that guy lol
What a dick, but he has comical talent ;D

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Diicccckkkkk move !

Okay, here's wahtcha shoulda done.
Punched him in the dick and said
"Know what YOU and that sogn had in common? Neither of you sastisfied me."

What a jerk

you should have kicked his ass!

Oh my gosh! I'm sorry! Revenge is sweet my dear, take a bite! :)

wow thats fuck up
mens can be such jerks =/

WELL played i hope? ;)

WTF I can't believe anybody is laughing at this?! :( That's terrible. He's got to be one of the biggest assholes ever!! I wish the worst on him >:(

That's a good example of why I'm sexist towards my own sex... most guys are chauvinistic pigs -_-

Wow.He's a player.A jackass.Kick his ass!!!!!Jesus dont just sit there,ya gotta get revenge.

Wow.He's a player.A jackass.Kick his ass!!!!!Jesus dont just sit there,ya gotta get revenge.

It happens. However, in the end, you must realize that sex and emotional involvement are overrated. It is best to be told point-blank than to remain an object and only later realize it was play.

eeeeeh what a self centered JERK!

omg! that really is fucked up!

Damn thats fucked up, girl you can get yoself another man that can treat u right and doesnt play you, keep yo head high chica

BWAHAHAHAHAAAa.. im sorry for what happened to ya, but i had to lol really hard at this one.
:D

Damnn, thats shitty as hellllllllllllllll.

):
Dudes a prick.

UGH!!! what an ass hole!!! I hope you slapped him, at least!!!

ouch!!!!! jerk much? trust me he wasn NOT worthi it if he treated you like THAT!!!!

typical for a girl to like a guy who would do this.

that must have really hurt. just take whatever lesson you can get from this. not all men are like him.

I actually gasped when I read this :O

Wow I can't even imagine somebody being so much of an asshole. Especially after getting sexed. Well at least the bar has been set pretty low- the next guy you're with will charm the shit out of you.

wow...i dont even know you and i would kick that fuckers ass in a second

i would of punched him in his face

That SUCKS!

OMG. That probably is the meanest thing I've ever heard.

What an A**hole!!! Get Revenge in a horrible way!!! Perhaps put an ad in Craigslist saying that there is a big gay orgy for Muscle Men and then write down his address, I think that might teach him a valuable lesson about what it means to be "played," when sixty muscled guys show up at his place looking for rough sex :))

lmao what a sickcunt
respect. im sure she was a slut anyway
clearly..

Let's hope you learned something from this. Sex does not equal love, and it will never get you love. Screwing a guy without having any prior conversation about expectations or already being committed to each other in some way never works.

HAHAHAHAHAHA!

Oh my god, that's horrible... what a fucking douchbag, I hope you didn't continue to like him.

i've heard that before. make up something orignial.

i would kill ANY guy that would do that to another girl (yes even our black president) but nevertheless that is one nice pun :D but i would still kill him (with all sincerity)

OWNED!!! but still, srry about that douschbag op

u shudve grab his balls....and press it rly hard...

Royally OWNED / BURNED. Still sucks big time 4 u

That's cold! Hope u hit him were it hurts ;)

i don't know whether to say YDI or FYL i mean if you've liked him for a while you probably wanted more than sex out of it and the only way to get that is by not jumping in the sack right away but what he did was really fucked too