Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Today, on my way home, my girlfriend started sexting me, telling me that she was waiting at my house. In my rush to get home to see her, I got pulled over and had to be patted down. He found no weapons, but he did find my stiffy. FML


I agree, your life sucks (39728) - you deserved it (11961)

On 10/04/2011 at 8:02pm - intimacy - by Username - United States

Top comments

What's this? A gun? A knife? You people make me sick.

It must be a gun, it has a sort of rounded tip. Wait...hang on.

My mistake...

#4 - On 10/05/2011 at 2:40am by ollie179

See in context

Is that your phone in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?

#1 - On 10/05/2011 at 2:37am by saysayok

See in context




Speak your mind, but please try and be respectful.

Top of the page

You must have an FML account to comment.

Don't have an FML account yet ? Sign up to FML!

C comme Line's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Best of the Worst #20
  • Here we are in November! Winter is here, for most of us, it's dark, grey and depressing and if you're the kind of person who watches network news 24/7, you're probably going to need some cheering up.…

Monday 30 November 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: