World

Today, I went on my first date in a year with a guy I met just a couple hours ago. I went back to my hotel to get better dressed and met him at the bar. I brought my purse, he brought his girlfriend. FML

By Anonymous - / Thursday 17 August 2017 22:45 / Romania
World

Today, on my second week in my new job, I opened my desk drawer of snacks. Apparently no one had bothered to tell me that there's an office rat or mouse that the building management refuses to do anything about. FML

By Stan017 - / Thursday 17 August 2017 03:45 / Singapore - Singapore
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By Krysis - / Tuesday 15 August 2017 15:45 / Trinidad and Tobago - Fyzabad
World
By Melonn3105 - / Tuesday 15 August 2017 03:45 / Brunei
World

Today, I asked my boyfriend to meet me in the park to talk. Just when I wanted to break up, he knelt down on one knee and proposed. I had to reject him in front of a whole crowd of people. FML

By rubyroyal123 - / Sunday 13 August 2017 21:45 / Netherlands
World

Today, my mother pointed out to me how much my fiancé looks like my brother. She's right. I never noticed before, but now I can't unsee it. I don't think I'll ever be able to touch him again. FML

By deerlord - / Saturday 12 August 2017 21:45 / Switzerland - Zurich
World
By AngelNi - / Friday 11 August 2017 21:45 / Czech Republic - Brno
World
By Angie - / Thursday 10 August 2017 21:45 / Netherlands - Amsterdam
World
By Anonymous - / Saturday 5 August 2017 05:00 / Netherlands
World

Today, I found out I will not be moving back to California. My mom told me we were going to go on a 2 month vacation to see family in India. She decided we are staying for good. FML

By WhatisLife - / Thursday 27 July 2017 09:00 / Bangladesh - Dhaka
World

Today, I got into an accident in my girlfriend's car. While I was in the emergency room, crying from the pain, she reassured me, "don't worry, you can pay me for the damage in several installments if you need to." FML

By Anonymous - / Friday 14 July 2017 21:30 / Italy
World

Today, it's my birthday. My boyfriend gave me a squeaky dog toy because "I don't know why, but it made me think of you." FML

By rupture-imminente - / Wednesday 12 July 2017 21:00 / France
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By Anonymous - / Monday 10 July 2017 21:00 / Argentina
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By Anonymous - / Thursday 6 July 2017 21:00 / Italy
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By unefoispasdeux - / Tuesday 4 July 2017 21:00 / France - Paris
World

Today, I played back the images of the tiny camera I attached to the collar of my cat to figure out where she goes when she disappears for several days at a time. I found my husband with another woman in our bed. FML

By Anonymous - / Thursday 29 June 2017 21:00 / Italy
World

Today, I got into a car accident. I hit a pole in the middle of the night trying to avoid a car that was coming at me head on. Actually, it was just the reflection of my own headlights in the windows of a bus stop. FML

By Lili - / Tuesday 27 June 2017 21:00 / France
World

Today, I was alone in the house at night when I almost died of fright after seeing a woman staring at me through the window. I screamed before realizing that she was just my reflection. FML

By Anonymous - / Sunday 25 June 2017 21:00 / Venezuela - Barquisimeto
World
By Anonymous - / Friday 23 June 2017 21:00 / Argentina
World
By Elmine - / Monday 19 June 2017 21:00 / France
World
By limeñaconmalasuerte - / Saturday 17 June 2017 21:00 / Peru
World

Today, I found out that when my 7 year old daughter invites her friends to eat dinner with us, she charges them 3 euros for the meal and puts it in her piggy bank. FML

By Anonymous - / Thursday 15 June 2017 21:00 / Italy
World

  Today, my boyfriend was blowing his nose when out of nowhere he started laughing and said, “hey, my nose is exactly like you in bed, I have to finish if off with my finger to get the job done.” FML

By Lap - / Monday 12 June 2017 17:19 / France - Paris
World

Today, I found out that I was a father, that my son is married, that his wife is pregnant, and that he and his wife would like me to take care of their eldest son during the end stages of the pregnancy. FML

By Anonymous - / Sunday 11 June 2017 21:00 / France
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