Intimacy: Today, I was taking a dump in a public restroom. Minding my own...

By stewiesclone - 11/02/2010 09:09 - United States

Today, I was taking a dump in a public restroom. Minding my own business, I heard somebody go into an adjacent stall. It was dead silent and I don't think he knew I was in there. I thought I heard him scratching his arm or something. I was wrong. He was jacking off. I had to listen to it all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 950

You deserved it 3 047

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Same thing different taste

By ThoroughlyCreepedOut - 07/03/2010 00:22 - United States

Today, while in a public restroom, a man entered the stall next to me and began vigorously wanking. He finished quickly, but as he was leaving he peeped in at me through the crack in the stall door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 306

You deserved it 2 244

Wanker

By fired - 09/08/2013 22:17

Today, I was in the restroom at work, snickering at some funny stories on my phone while I took a dump. Little did I know that the asshole in the next stall would report me to our boss, claiming he'd heard weird noises, then looked over the divider and witnessed me jacking off to porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 229

You deserved it 7 477

By Dhagiik - 24/02/2017 18:00 - United States - Oak Park

Today, I walked into the bathroom at work, and in the stall next to me I could hear someone pleasuring himself. I decided to let my boss know what was going on, but it turns out that it was my boss in the stall next to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 136

You deserved it 1 129

By Anonymous - 26/09/2011 18:52 - United States

Today, at work while on the toilet, somebody came into the stall next to me and gave a loud play by play of every fart, plop, and grunt. He then asked loudly who I was and when I didn't answer put his head under the stall to look at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 046

You deserved it 3 547

By biblewanker - 17/12/2010 16:05 - Australia

Today, while in a public restroom I could hear a guy having his way with his hand. He was quoting verses from the bible. I was in a cubicle and he was at the urinal. I was too frightened to leave. This went on for a very long time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 731

You deserved it 3 565

By dammitall - 15/05/2009 18:49 - United States

Today, I was in a bathroom stall peeing. Shortly after, I heard a couple enter the bathroom, both extremely drunk. They then had sex standing up against the stall I was in, blocking my only exit. I had to sit, wait, and listen as both parties finished. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 405

You deserved it 4 877

By Sleeper_C3ll - 04/02/2009 23:04 - United States

Today, I heard a man pleasuring himself in the stall next to me during my post lunch deuce. I was washing my hands when my boss walked out of the stall. I can no longer look at him in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 077

You deserved it 2 872

By XavierLing - 23/07/2019 06:00

Today, my thigh was itchy, so I went into a bathroom stall to scratch it. I, for some reason, moaned out loud while doing it. After that, the men's bathroom went completely silent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 083

You deserved it 756

By Bobby ray slice - 22/08/2011 00:03 - United States

Today, I went into a public bathroom and walked in on a guy checking his butt out in the mirror to see if he'd wiped properly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 701

You deserved it 2 807

Alone

By shit - 30/05/2019 06:00

Today, I was in a public restroom trying to take a dump. It's difficult for me to do it in public, so to make it easier I kept telling myself, "Nobody's here, you're all alone." I then heard, "No you're not." I didn't realize I was saying it out loud. And that I wasn't alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 776

You deserved it 719

ilikeyouuu 0

Thursday 11 February 2010 16:13

I would have said, in an uber gay voice, "wanna do me next?!". lmao

Averizzle 0

Thursday 11 February 2010 16:02

Join him.

Comments

Averizzle 0

Thursday 11 February 2010 16:02

Join him.

azurablade 0

Thursday 11 February 2010 16:06

I like pie.

USAFchef 2

Thursday 11 February 2010 16:11

u should have farted really loud...hahaha

drunastunamazing 0

Thursday 11 February 2010 16:14

baha! if I were you I would have been like having fun in there buddy!? that's pretty funny!

scuba1722 0

Thursday 11 February 2010 16:14

ask if he needs a hand... or just fart loud as u can cough twice flush the toilet get up wash ur hands... crucial... then say don't force it and walk out... he will be in awkward moment

cliter_dick 2

Thursday 11 February 2010 17:48

yah he should have that would be reeaaalllyyy funny!!! how can you hear when someone is jacking off??

JCadle90 0

Thursday 11 February 2010 17:58

hit his stall and yell police

maa_rico 4

Thursday 11 February 2010 18:34

I would've faced off that guy to a Jack off

MXavierT 0

Thursday 11 February 2010 19:01

46 WIN

wooow_sucks_for_ 0

Thursday 11 February 2010 20:52

throw a to roll over your stall into his. or better yet, say in a ladylike voice "son?". ooooooooooorrrrr, pretend you're on the phone and say "yeah. hold on I cant hear you. some shitheads jacking off."

me199 0

Thursday 11 February 2010 21:44

Right when he finishes off... flush the toilet

soccer060 0

Thursday 11 February 2010 23:57

either #46 or hit the side of the stall and ask if he's got any extra paper

WhatANoob 0

Friday 12 February 2010 0:35

it's more his FML you shouldve said in a gay voice "Heeeeeeyyy"

jazziloveberryy 3

Friday 12 February 2010 3:06

lol #93

Extacy23 0

Friday 12 February 2010 6:01

@maa_rico is that wat u and ur dad do?

MattJalac 0

Friday 12 February 2010 6:50

LOL LOL

themajik 0

Friday 12 February 2010 7:29

you should have started singing the cleanup song when he was done

Elmo8mehwaffles 0

Friday 12 February 2010 8:32

Wdf? Why would u sit through that?? U obviously liked it...

BigLostBear 0

Friday 12 February 2010 11:07

#46 wins, that surely wouldve caused him to rethink what he was doing, and the surprised look on his face when he's zipped up his pants and opens the door to see it's not an actual policeman Priceless!