This is a Nearly FML. It’s an FML, nearly. It got positive votes from the users, by wasn’t approved by our team.

By notunattractive - 02/09/2018 06:00

Today, my boyfriend told me, while cuddling, that I am "just not sexy". I try to seduce him regularly, but he always turns me down. But I should feel flattered: it proves how much he loves me, since he stays with me anyway. FML
I agree, your life sucks 3 454
You deserved it 356

Top comments

That's not on. Most women are sexy. Except the ones I'm related to, and any that look like The Donald. This douche is being passive aggressive enough that you'll feel you can't do any better than him. You can, and you will, but first you need to ditch this asshat so you're free to move on. When you're done, rally the troops, and go have some fun.

OP, here's hoping that he doesn't have a side chick yet stays with you for other, selfish reasons nonetheless. Either way it doesn't seem like a favorable situ for you if he's doing you the favor of being your BF yet fails to adequately communicate with you about important interpersonal relationship topics like sex. I hope that you're not settling because of low self-esteem issues. Good luck!

Comments

OP, here's hoping that he doesn't have a side chick yet stays with you for other, selfish reasons nonetheless. Either way it doesn't seem like a favorable situ for you if he's doing you the favor of being your BF yet fails to adequately communicate with you about important interpersonal relationship topics like sex. I hope that you're not settling because of low self-esteem issues. Good luck!

That's not on. Most women are sexy. Except the ones I'm related to, and any that look like The Donald. This douche is being passive aggressive enough that you'll feel you can't do any better than him. You can, and you will, but first you need to ditch this asshat so you're free to move on. When you're done, rally the troops, and go have some fun.

What happened to "women are more than their looks"? All the cries to stop calling women hot/sexy/beautiful? All the insisting that women are instead smart/funny/strong? Is it not possible he is attracted to her for other reasons than sex appeal, or do (some) women really only value those physical characteristics about themselves that men are no longer allowed to admire?

Wow, you're actualy going to argue that the boyfriend doesn't care about sexyness here? Sure, you can think that. Except that the boyfriend was clearly meaning this as a criticism, since he points out that he should get brownie points for staying with OP anyway. So yeah, no matter how much you feel you should be valued beyond sex appeal. once your boyfriend is criticizing you for lacking it and then saying "but babe, aren't I great because I love you despite your huge flawes?" then you have a serious problem.

JubileeBee 31

does he mean it in the sense that you're moreso cute or pretty than sexy? or maybe he just isn't a sex-oriented guy. my boyfriend tries to seduce me literally every time he sees me and as utterly attractive as i find him, i'm just not a very sex-motivated person.

Do women not recognize when they’ve been put in the Friend Zone? They send us there often enough.

blondie45 21

A relationship without passion won’t last. Sooner or later he’ll find someone that he does think is sexy and then he’ll move on... it’s sweet that he’s with you now but you deserve someone who thinks you are THE sexiest being alive. I would gently let him down and move on...

blondie45 21

Possibly he’s gay and hasn’t worked it out yet OR is under social pressure to be “normal” and have a girlfriend? Either way, you deserve better...

I was in the exact situation with my now ex. We never had sex. We had to plan it out.. or I had to ask to do anything physical done to me or me do to him. It was very frustrating after a while. If he doesn’t want you as you are and rejects you, its not healthy and its time to move on from this douche. Hope you find someone who appreciates you! You deserve it!

Girl, gather up your self worth and leave this toxic mess. He's tearing you down so you feel worthless and undesirable, so you think no one else will want you, and will feel like he's the only option and you stay with him. People like this are insecure, controlling, and manipulative. It doesn't get better. Even if there are positive times, the mind games will get worse. I've seen some really amazing people become husks of themselves because of people like this. Please don't become one of them. Go find someone that DOES find you sexy!

You deserve someone who does find you sexy, or at least tries to communicate what they actually DO find sexy. They may also be a **** addict, so they don’t find actual people sexy anymore.

As a guy I will tell you flat out if he says he doesn't find you sexy leave him and find someone who does. I have been married for 15 years(and I was a real alleycat before I met my wife a flavor of the week type) and my wife is STILL sexy to me.