World

Today, I woke up to find out that last night I got extremely drunk, dumped my boyfriend of 3 years, bought a female ostrich, named it Frederic, and confessed my undying love for it via YouTube. FML

By Fml4evr - / Sunday 22 April 2018 00:30 / United Kingdom
By My rapey cat (doesn't even have balls) - / Saturday 21 April 2018 01:30 /
By Itstinksinhere - / Thursday 19 April 2018 15:00 /
By ReallyUniverse?? - / Sunday 18 March 2018 19:00 /
By Anonymous - / Sunday 4 March 2018 01:30 /
World

Today, my dog became too old to eat dry food. A $9 bag used to last him 3 weeks. The equivalent in the cheapest canned food is $63. FML

By DogGoneIt - / Monday 22 January 2018 11:00 / Australia - Adelaide
By shaggyberaddy - / Friday 5 January 2018 05:00 /
By Catpiss - / Wednesday 3 January 2018 16:30 / United States - San Bernardino
By Cat lover - / Saturday 23 December 2017 01:30 /
By Jerry - / Tuesday 19 December 2017 15:00 /
By It's-only15-lbs-extra - / Thursday 14 December 2017 15:00 /
CoyoteOldOne Say more :
I am an uncontrolled human. The cat is uncontrolled also. Cat food doesnt smell nice to me, and it was a strong, wet, meaty smell. Dammit, that came out bad too. Maybe i should work at one of those phone sex lines.
By Coyote - / Sunday 10 December 2017 06:45 /
By piliseep - / Friday 1 December 2017 09:00 / United States - Apex
World

Today, at work, a mosquito landed on my brand new tattoo. Without thinking, I slapped it. Hard. FML

By ouchy - / Wednesday 29 November 2017 19:30 / Australia
By Jobear - / Sunday 26 November 2017 01:30 /
Achicken123 Say more :
I have no clue what happened, she was so young and one day she just stopped doing cat things. None of the vets we went to could find anything. At least she passed in her sleep while somewhere she loved.
By Bird - / Tuesday 21 November 2017 21:54 /
By SmellyLeg - / Monday 20 November 2017 15:00 /
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