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Today, I was struck down with horrible diarrhea. With barely any toilet paper left, I texted my husband to buy some more and rush home. He replied, "Sorry babe, getting shitfaced with the lads. Get it? 'Shitfaced'. LOL!" and stopped replying to my desperate pleas. FML

#20517914
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23317) - you deserved it (2412)

On 02/22/2013 at 7:31pm - health - by arse of fire :( (woman) - United Kingdom (Slough)

Today, I went back home after seeing the doctor, I told my boyfriend my new medicine might cause some mood swings. He immediately grabbed his phone and pretended to take a call, then rushed out. FML

#20516690
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18366) - you deserved it (2037)

On 02/21/2013 at 8:21pm - health - by NewDrugs (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I moved in with my new dorm mate. I'm prone to very frequent panic attacks that can only be alleviated by cold air. My roommate is severely anemic, and has violent shivering fits when the temperature is below 80. No matter what, one of us is always shaking uncontrollably. FML

#20509130
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27848) - you deserved it (2528)

On 02/16/2013 at 3:47am - health - by Chuffberry - United States (Colorado)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my mum got the idea of switching to a different dishwashing detergent. The new one is so strong that it coats all the dishes in a nauseating perfume-like smell. It's so pungent that it gets absorbed into everything we eat or drink. She's determined to use up the entire bottle. FML

#20508218
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19398) - you deserved it (1336)

On 02/15/2013 at 1:50pm - health - by selena5112 (woman) - Norway (Troms)

Today, I realized that without my birth control pills, I would have no idea what day it is. FML

#20507998
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17108) - you deserved it (9970)

On 02/15/2013 at 8:57am - health - by PurpleSloth (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I walked past a few of my coworkers sitting outside smoking. As I got a whiff of the smoke, I coughed. They immediately started to defend their habit, and I was told to "mind my own fucking business." I wasn't trying to be rude; I'm actually allergic to cigarette smoke. FML

#20507668
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27504) - you deserved it (3131)

On 02/15/2013 at 12:53am - health - by youmindyourownbusiness - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got my very first yeast infection. Thinking she would help me, I went to my mom. Instead she began yelling about how I'm lying and it's an STD and I don't believe in the power of Jesus. FML

#20503942
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25566) - you deserved it (1663)

On 02/12/2013 at 6:01pm - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I both developed food poisoning from last night's sushi. Our apartment has one bathroom. FML

#20503655
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22679) - you deserved it (2499)

On 02/12/2013 at 1:43pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my needle-phobic mother took me to get a shot. She fainted. FML

#20503278
21 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17286) - you deserved it (1810)

On 02/12/2013 at 2:41am - health - by shots shots shots (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I unknowingly bought a house next to a former toxic waste dump. I found out by reading an article in the paper where residents are claiming that they are experiencing cancer and birth defects. FML

#20503049
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22993) - you deserved it (4554)

On 02/11/2013 at 11:18pm - health - by toxic waste - United States (New York)

Today, at a mixed-family game of rugby, my dad resorted to calling me a "goddamned accident" and eventually body-slamming me, just so I'd stop playing long enough for his team to score. FML

#20498727
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22038) - you deserved it (2100)

On 02/08/2013 at 8:53pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I had my gallbladder removed. I have a very painful incision in my belly that makes any kind of movement excruciating. I've had the hiccups 5 times so far. FML

#20497751
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25619) - you deserved it (1221)

On 02/08/2013 at 12:31am - health - by IHeartBlueJay - United States

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I hurt my back while exercising. I can't bend over or lift my arms above my head without intense pain. My husband, however, finds my situation hilarious and has moved everything I use frequently to either the floor or high shelf. He giggles every time I try to retrieve anything. FML

#20495821
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26758) - you deserved it (2489)

On 02/06/2013 at 4:05pm - health - by AplJax3 (woman) - United States

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.



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