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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I slipped on a patch of ice and fell. I would have fallen straight onto my ass, but thankfully my testicles broke my fall. FML

#7143279
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39765) - you deserved it (2977)

On 01/04/2010 at 8:34am - health - by Soresack (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I pulled a hamstring by taking a dump. FML

#7139059
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28468) - you deserved it (6993)

On 01/04/2010 at 1:43am - health - by sadface (woman) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I walked to the end of my driveway to pick up the newspaper. I read the front page that was talking about people who have been getting hurt from slipping on ice. Laughing about that thought and walking up my driveway, I slip. FML

#7135383
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6460) - you deserved it (31299)

On 01/03/2010 at 10:50pm - health - by fml (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while on the treadmill, my iPod fell and shot out underneath my feet. I got off to get it, and when I tried to get back on, I slipped and fell on my face on the moving track. The whole gym watched me get beat up by a treadmill and clapped when I finally got back on. FML

#7124600
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27598) - you deserved it (6018)

On 01/03/2010 at 11:28am - health - by i-should-probably-stick-to-swimming (man) - United States (California)

Today, I got sent home from work for appearing stoned/under the influence of drugs. I suffer from severe hay fever, which no antihistamine has fixed yet, hence the red and glassy eyes. FML

#7121915
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28258) - you deserved it (2088)

On 01/03/2010 at 5:59am - health - by nzkristy (woman) - New Zealand (Southland)

Today, my mother forwarded me an email my stepdad had sent her because he was annoyed that I left a light on last night. Talk about communication problems. I wonder how I'm going to tell them I'm pregnant. FML

#7121728
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30732) - you deserved it (6138)

On 01/03/2010 at 5:36am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - South Africa (Western Cape)

Today, my boyfriend had to be hospitalized to drain poison from a bad spider bite. His mom is convinced that he got it from my house and won't let him come over anymore. I suppose she's right, because guess who found a spider web under their bed today, along with 5 new spider bites? FML

#7098506
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32073) - you deserved it (4357)

On 01/02/2010 at 2:50am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I emptied out a bottle of water onto my porch as I was going into my house. Only a couple of hours later, I decided to leave and slipped on what had turned into ice, bruised my tailbone and sprained my wrist. FML

#7097742
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7964) - you deserved it (33476)

On 01/02/2010 at 2:08am - health - by couturier - Sent from mobile version

Today, I went to the drugstore to get supplies for my broken toe. Because of the swelling, I could only wear open-toed sandals on this cold day. At the store, a tall, heavy man in winter boots tried to get by me, and ended up stepping on the toes of my good foot. FML

#7094930
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22999) - you deserved it (2197)

On 01/02/2010 at 12:26am - health - by ouchie (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I realized that the only part of my body that has had a reduction in size from changing my diet and working out isn't my stomach or my thighs but my already undersized breasts. FML

#7094608
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28347) - you deserved it (2914)

On 01/02/2010 at 12:15am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I tripped over a ice block frozen to the ground and hit my knee hard on another. I had trouble getting up, so I asked my dad if he could give me a hand. He started clapping and walked away. FML

#7048794
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24354) - you deserved it (3709)

On 12/31/2009 at 1:23am - health - by .... (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, my doctor told me my ankle has been fractured since last week. I've been helping drywall the basement, and trying to walk up and down stairs for a week. My husband has been telling me to man up, and it's not that bad. FML

Today, I realized that the cute freckle I noticed a few weeks ago is actually a giant blackhead. FML

#7034832
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11423) - you deserved it (24327)

On 12/30/2009 at 12:26pm - health - by baybuh (woman) - United States (California)



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