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Today, I found a mealworm in my cornflakes. I had already finished most of the bowl. I didn't make it to the toilet to throw up. FML

#6431764
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23269) - you deserved it (2463)

On 11/24/2009 at 1:00am - health - by blowinchunks (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was talking to my boyfriend about how I'm self conscious about my weight. He looks at me and says, "Don't worry babe, I've always been kind of a chubby chaser." FML

#6430848
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23021) - you deserved it (7021)

On 11/24/2009 at 12:03am - health - by cc (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I woke up to find my car broken into. They also took the inhaler that fell out of my bag the night before. The one I needed to stop the asthma attack I had from the stress of having my car broken into. FML

#6403775
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33506) - you deserved it (2397)

On 11/22/2009 at 11:49am - health - by trying2breathe (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I had a tooth pulled. An hour or so later, I removed the gauze from my mouth, because I thought the bleeding had stopped. I got on my laptop. A few minutes later I looked down, to see that I had drooled blood all over the keyboard, and didn't know because my mouth was numb. FML

#6392030
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11953) - you deserved it (29064)

On 11/21/2009 at 6:21pm - health - by MrZach (man) - United States

Today, I was enjoying the benefits of marriage with my new husband. We were changing positions when my joints started crackling and popping like my mother's did when I was a kid. My husband stopped, concerned about my possible pain... I'm 20 years old and pop like an arthritic 50 year old. FML

#6381623
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26005) - you deserved it (3343)

On 11/20/2009 at 4:27pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, a old lady on the street told me that I should be wearing a bra because my nipples were visible under my white tee. I am a 37 year old man. FML

#6373189
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22054) - you deserved it (5192)

On 11/19/2009 at 7:41pm - health - by Mondo (man) - United States (California)

Today, I took my dog to the vet because he hadn't eaten his food in three days, was drinking a lot of water, and was peeing a lot (all signs of antifreeze poisoning). I spent $200 at the vet to tell me that my dog is fine and just didn't like his current food. FML

#6367435
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23461) - you deserved it (4787)

On 11/19/2009 at 11:14am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my girlfriend woke up very early in terrible pain. I drove her to the hospital and fell asleep in the waiting area. When I woke up, my car was gone and it was 9am. She had assumed I just walked home (32 miles), so she took the car. I was the only one in the waiting area. FML

#6367278
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31813) - you deserved it (2767)

On 11/19/2009 at 10:53am - health - by nolips (man) - Norway (Oslo)

Today, I decided to begin jogging since my weight was getting a little out of control and I wanted to do something about it. Guess who tripped on a root and broke their ankle? Yeah. Exactly. FML

#6365107
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26422) - you deserved it (4903)

On 11/19/2009 at 2:33am - health - by SeeTony (man) - United States (California)

Today, I have to go to the dentist to get a tooth capped. Why? Because my room mate knows I sleepwalk and thought it would be funny to put a trip wire across the top of the stairs. It worked. FML

#6359695
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28772) - you deserved it (2078)

On 11/18/2009 at 8:30pm - health - by CB (man) - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, I was sitting at lunch and started choking on a chip. I couldn't breathe and nobody tried to help me. Having to take matters into my own hands, I reached for a juice box that belonged to someone sitting next to me. After I could breathe again, they informed me that they had mono. FML

#6358488
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30228) - you deserved it (4194)

On 11/18/2009 at 7:19pm - health - by ohmigodimchokin (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my water wouldn't go down my shower drain. Confused, I stuck a metal stick expecting hair, but instead stabbed and pulled up a rat that was dead in my drain. FML

#6349337
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33971) - you deserved it (2091)

On 11/17/2009 at 11:08pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was at home with slight constipation, so I took two laxatives. That's when my boyfriend called me, saying his parents are in town and want to have dinner tonight, this being the first time I've met them. I've already been on the toilet five times. FML

#6342074
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26669) - you deserved it (5220)

On 11/17/2009 at 3:05pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)



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