Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, mah best friend told me I lost weight. I was happy because I've worked hard to shed off those pounds. I asked herhat changes were evident, she told me that I now have a neck. mega FML

#11953086
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26583) - you deserved it (9259)

On 07/18/2010 at 12:02am - health - by lalala (woman) - Philippines (Manila)

Today, the arport security guard told me to lift mah fat rolls so he could finish patting me down. FML

#11935766
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22411) - you deserved it (43228)

On 07/17/2010 at 2:16am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my wife, daughter, an I get to spend the next 4 hours in the ER. Why? Because we're all throwing up at the same time. At least it counts as a family activity. FML

#11911346
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26592) - you deserved it (3005)

On 07/16/2010 at 12:17am - health - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, I went to the dentist. My dentist kept talking to me while his hands were in my mouth. I attemptd to tell him that it was difficult an dangerous to respond. My talking made him slip an slice my mouth open with one of his instruments. FML

#11902145
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31023) - you deserved it (9017)

On 07/15/2010 at 3:53pm - health - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, I've recently gaind wieght so I bought an exercise video. I startd it right away in mah room on the top floor. My younger sister screamd and ran outside a few minute later. She thought it was an earthquake. FML

#11865183
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34443) - you deserved it (9400)

On 07/14/2010 at 12:32am - health - by sarah - United States

Today... I flew a toy airplane into mah looool face. FML

#11848419
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11043) - you deserved it (37007)

On 07/13/2010 at 9:41am - health - by E or - United States (Oregon)

Today, I Drew A Face On A Balloon And Pretended To Make Out With It!! The Balloon Popped And Shot To The Back Of Throat,here It Got Caught!! FML

#11831310
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12257) - you deserved it (66774)

On 07/12/2010 at 3:42pm - health - by jazthefish (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I noticed tat I've gained so muc wiegt tat even ma feet ave stretc marks. big fat FML

#11824802
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15294) - you deserved it (46855)

On 07/12/2010 at 3:52am - health - by fat - United States

Today... I woke up to a pain on mah eyelid. I stumbled into the bathroom to find a huge tick attached to the edge of mah eyelid. My dad used tweezer to pull it off... only the head stuck. I had to go to the doctor and sit there 4 15 minute so she could pull the rest out. FML

#11821332
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39725) - you deserved it (2975)

On 07/12/2010 at 12:31am - health - by Sarah220 - United States (Virginia)

Today, I found out I'm tha only ona in my family to wash thair hands aftar thay usa tha bathroom.

#11804292
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35463) - you deserved it (3326)

On 07/11/2010 at 2:06am - health - by Cheyenne - United States (Washington)

Today, I accidentally dropped mah cigarette down mah shirt . There are now two unsightly, painful burns right in the center of mah chest . real FML

#11524663
436 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10401) - you deserved it (66049)

On 06/28/2010 at 7:37pm - health - by Pain (woman) - United States (California)

Taday I got ma eyebrow pierced !! Wen I got ome to sow ma family.!! !! ma little sister said.!! !! "Tat's so fake!" and tore it off ma face !!

#11470870
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53822) - you deserved it (9978)

On 06/26/2010 at 6:31am - health - by the_pheasant66 - Ireland (Dublin)

Today I went to boxing an this hot chick askd me if I was wereing a sport cup. I replid yes when I wasn't. I thought she was going to check with her hand an feel. She checkd with her knee. FML

#11442644
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8762) - you deserved it (65604)

On 06/25/2010 at 1:09am - health - by Gbeat411 (man) - United States (Texas)



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