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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I fell asleep after finishing my exam. I had a dream I was falling and woke up smashing my face on the desk. Everyone laughed. FML

#7459742
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21167) - you deserved it (7610)

On 01/20/2010 at 6:19pm - health - by M_Kclift1994 (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I decided to treat my yeast infection over the counter to avoid going to the doctor. Too bad I didn't read the directions. Now I have to go to the doctor to get the tip of the applicator removed. FML

#7455740
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4604) - you deserved it (24454)

On 01/20/2010 at 1:21pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I found out the antibiotics I'm taking can cause you to vomit unexpectedly. In the car. While driving. To work. FML

#7437528
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23367) - you deserved it (2436)

On 01/19/2010 at 2:25pm - health - by addie19 (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my niece offered me a slice of cake. After I refused, she asked, "Why not? Aren't fat people always hungry?" FML

#7430497
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24985) - you deserved it (5597)

On 01/19/2010 at 12:08am - health - by Fatlady43 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, as I showered, I sneezed, hit my face on the wall, got shampoo in my eyes, slipped on a bar of soap, bashed my head on the wall as I fell, grabbed at the walls to stop me from falling and happened to turn off the cold water, scorching me. FML

#7391699
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40494) - you deserved it (4336)

On 01/17/2010 at 1:22am - health - by Concussed (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was stuck on the toilet with a huge stomachache after eating bad food the day before. I got up to flush when I noticed that there was a cockroach struggling feebly in the pile of crap. I'll never know if it got there before or after I crapped. FML

#7379683
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28712) - you deserved it (2537)

On 01/16/2010 at 3:19pm - health - by dire-rear (woman) - Singapore

Today, I went to my doctor to get my x-ray results. Turns out, I have a fractured spine and a chip of my spine has moved. Now I'm in a neck brace because my dad didn't think it was serious, and told me to "suck it up princess." FML

#7346390
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24543) - you deserved it (1672)

On 01/14/2010 at 9:07pm - health - by RAHrahRAH (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my teacher compared the female reproductive system to Shrek's head. Never again will I be able to watch the movies. FML

#7340967
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22818) - you deserved it (3324)

On 01/14/2010 at 4:56pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was dissecting a pig for my anatomy class. The smell of four day-old dead pig caused me to faint. My mom drove me home and warmed me up some left overs for lunch. It was pork chops. FML

#7339012
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24674) - you deserved it (3521)

On 01/14/2010 at 2:41pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I learned I have a severe sinus infection, my body really can't handle antibiotics, and I can projectile vomit out my nose. Not sure if I am more impressed that I still somehow aimed the puke into the sink, or that swallowing afterwards hurt more than emptying my stomach via my nose. FML

#7294693
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22692) - you deserved it (1721)

On 01/12/2010 at 2:18am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was sent to the hospital for being knocked out with a potato. FML

#7290118
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25080) - you deserved it (3444)

On 01/11/2010 at 10:40pm - health - by brileyyyy - United States (Missouri)

Today, my mom found a pack of cigarettes in my pocket. She hates smoking, so she tore every single cigarette to pieces, then emptied a bag of kitty litter on them. On my bed. FML

#7273093
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8553) - you deserved it (47972)

On 01/11/2010 at 2:23am - health - by alexbobalex (woman) - Aland Islands

Today, I was very sick with a stomach virus, so I went to the only doctor's office open on Sundays. Even though I was feeling like a pile of shit, I waited for a woman who was walking in behind me to hold the door open for her. She was the last patient they could take for the day. FML

#7270960
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28308) - you deserved it (2499)

On 01/11/2010 at 12:19am - health - by Gentleman (man) - United States (Mississippi)



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