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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I learned not to jump off a stage if nobody is going to catch you. FML

#8941097
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6334) - you deserved it (32835)

On 03/09/2010 at 6:14am - health - by oww - United States (Virginia)

Today, my roommate confronted me about my eating disorder. She described in length how emaciated my chest has become and how she wants to help. Except I don't have an eating disorder. My sternum is deformed and I have only recently become confident enough to wear low-cut tops. FML

#8940307
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33981) - you deserved it (2251)

On 03/09/2010 at 3:57am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, after puking all over the bathroom and my legs, I called my husband for sympathy. The first thing he says is "Did you cry?" and when I answered no, instead of wishing me better he quickly exclaimed "WHO'S MY BIG GIRL!" FML

#8923957
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20041) - you deserved it (6086)

On 03/08/2010 at 5:40pm - health - by gotitEVERYWHERE (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I woke up with one of the worst migraines I've had in months. My mother (who thinks I'm a hypochondriac) began to scream at me about "making up an illness". When I asked for my meds, she called me an addict and dumped my $300 prescription down the sink. FML

#8899793
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28341) - you deserved it (2488)

On 03/07/2010 at 7:16pm - health - by space_cadet90818 (woman) - United States (Vermont)

Today, my friend and I went to the park. I bet my friend I could fit into the swing that was sized for toddlers. I managed to fit in, but I couldn't get out. My friend had to call 911 to get me out. When they finally did, the fireman told me that fat ladies shouldn't try stuff like that. FML

#8883543
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8013) - you deserved it (33428)

On 03/07/2010 at 12:41am - health - by fatlady - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was walking through the mall with my husband. We came across a guy who was selling some weight loss pills. He tried to sell me some and I kindly declined. He told me not to deny my weight problems. Thanks. I'm 7 months pregnant. FML

#8859740
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25674) - you deserved it (2326)

On 03/06/2010 at 12:16am - health - by KateD - United States (Illinois)

Today, I went to go see a specialist for my prostate and was told he would have to do an exam before I could leave. Having had this checked just the previous year, I was more than a little irritated. As I was bent over the table the Dr. said, "Now, just pretend I'm Angelina Jolie." FML

#8851700
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22950) - you deserved it (2417)

On 03/05/2010 at 7:40pm - health - by artsmart1 - United States

Today, my grandma's cat peed on my full leg cast. The closest doctor was a three hour drive away. So my grandma wouldn't take me at all the whole weekend. FML

Today, I came down with sudden diarrhea while at taekwondo practice. I discreetly called my dad for a pickup, but on our way out, he told my instructor that I had to go because I was "shitting my pants with fear". He did this in front of all my classmates. FML

#8823519
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22969) - you deserved it (2384)

On 03/04/2010 at 1:52pm - health - by GoDiarrhea (woman) - Argentina (Distrito Federal)

Today, I went to the pharmacy and asked the very attractive pharmacist what to do about the terrible itching under my cast. She told me to be a man and deal with it. FML

#8797696
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20410) - you deserved it (7097)

On 03/03/2010 at 11:46am - health - by brokenarm (man) - Germany (Niedersachsen)

Today, I found out exactly what Ducolax stool softener is all about. Holy colon cleanse Batman! FML

#8797519
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5952) - you deserved it (20961)

On 03/03/2010 at 11:34am - health - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, my throat is really swollen so I can only drink liquid. I noticed home-made ice-lollies in the freezer and had one. It tasted funny. Turns out my little brother had peed in one of those ice-lolly box and put it in the freezer. FML

Today, my husband admitted to me that he has a mental block about touching my boobs, because he's afraid that breast milk is going to spurt out at him. I had my son 5 months ago and I don't breast feed. FML

#8781188
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20092) - you deserved it (3480)

On 03/02/2010 at 8:03pm - health - by sunny_ca559 - United States



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Friday 17 October 2014

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