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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, feeling confident, I asked my boyfriend what he thought of my new body, since I had lost 16 kilos over the past month. He told me that he missed the old me and wanted me to gain weight again. My boyfriend was the one that encouraged me to lose weight in the first place. FML

#7193385
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22059) - you deserved it (2561)

On 01/07/2010 at 1:36am - health - by Srain (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my mom finally believed me when I said I smelled mold. I lifted up the couch, and it was covered in mold. So were the bottoms of all our furniture, our beds, and my grandma's vintage chair. We've been living in mold for the past 4 months. FML

#7183279
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24054) - you deserved it (4247)

On 01/06/2010 at 4:28pm - health - by moudly (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I picked the treadmill next to an old man so I could feel better about myself. He ran faster and longer than I did. FML

#7164815
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5245) - you deserved it (22021)

On 01/05/2010 at 3:16pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I shaved my legs and armpits for the first time in 6 weeks. Unfortunately, I didn't have a hot date, I just had my yearly gyno exam. FML

#7151625
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16470) - you deserved it (5941)

On 01/04/2010 at 8:43pm - health - by hairybetty (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I went to the dentist to get a baby tooth which had decayed removed. After almost an hour, I came out with a numb mouth and a missing tooth for life. It was not a baby tooth. FML

#7148180
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21882) - you deserved it (5375)

On 01/04/2010 at 5:29pm - health - by meh (woman) - United Kingdom (Shropshire)

Today, I was supposed to go to Disneyland with my family, but I woke up with explosive diarrhea. So while they are at the happiest place on Earth, I'm stuck on this toilet left to imagine that the splash from my crap is a splash from splash mountain. FML

#7148108
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25969) - you deserved it (2585)

On 01/04/2010 at 5:20pm - health - by onthetoilet - Sent from mobile version

Today, I'm in Mexico and am supposed to be skydiving for my Christmas gift. Instead, I'm coming out of the hospital with x-rays, an ankle splint, and a $800 bill because I fell on the bottom step of a flight of stairs. FML

#7145506
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16910) - you deserved it (2476)

On 01/04/2010 at 12:52pm - health - by Wally (man) - Mexico

Today, I slipped on a patch of ice and fell. I would have fallen straight onto my ass, but thankfully my testicles broke my fall. FML

#7143279
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33616) - you deserved it (2494)

On 01/04/2010 at 8:34am - health - by Soresack (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I pulled a hamstring by taking a dump. FML

#7139059
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21469) - you deserved it (5193)

On 01/04/2010 at 1:43am - health - by sadface (woman) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I walked to the end of my driveway to pick up the newspaper. I read the front page that was talking about people who have been getting hurt from slipping on ice. Laughing about that thought and walking up my driveway, I slip. FML

#7135383
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4878) - you deserved it (27066)

On 01/03/2010 at 10:50pm - health - by fml (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while on the treadmill, my iPod fell and shot out underneath my feet. I got off to get it, and when I tried to get back on, I slipped and fell on my face on the moving track. The whole gym watched me get beat up by a treadmill and clapped when I finally got back on. FML

#7124600
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22851) - you deserved it (5296)

On 01/03/2010 at 11:28am - health - by i-should-probably-stick-to-swimming (man) - United States (California)

Today, I got sent home from work for appearing stoned/under the influence of drugs. I suffer from severe hay fever, which no antihistamine has fixed yet, hence the red and glassy eyes. FML

#7121915
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23918) - you deserved it (1763)

On 01/03/2010 at 5:59am - health - by nzkristy (woman) - New Zealand (Southland)

Today, my mother forwarded me an email my stepdad had sent her because he was annoyed that I left a light on last night. Talk about communication problems. I wonder how I'm going to tell them I'm pregnant. FML

#7121728
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27584) - you deserved it (5673)

On 01/03/2010 at 5:36am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - South Africa (Western Cape)



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