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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I went bowling with my friends. As I was about to take my turn, my friend came up behind me and yelled in my ear, "Don't mess up!" Startled, I dropped the ball on my foot. FML

#8448273
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19047) - you deserved it (3210)

On 02/19/2010 at 5:00pm - health - by lexiiiiiiweee - United States

Today, I was walking to work, when I slipped and landed on my tail bone. Worse still, my hot coffee went flying into my face. I currently can't see out of my left eye. FML

#8443667
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19837) - you deserved it (1772)

On 02/19/2010 at 1:44pm - health - by corleon198425 - United States

Today, I had to help my dad remove a splinter. From his butt. FML

#8416746
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25107) - you deserved it (2203)

On 02/18/2010 at 7:44pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, a picture fell off of the wall in the middle of the night. It hit me smack bang in the middle of face. FML

#8403549
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18573) - you deserved it (3015)

On 02/18/2010 at 9:22am - health - by Hayleey_079 (woman) - United Kingdom (Gloucestershire)

Today, I went in to my local cafe for my morning coffee. I was chatting to the barista as she was making it, and I mentioned that I was starting a new diet. She goes, "Oh that's great! I've been sneaking skimmed milk in your coffee for years, I didn't want to say anything..." FML

#8388243
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17980) - you deserved it (3960)

On 02/17/2010 at 9:47pm - health - by Skimilk (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I found out the hard way that my girlfriend lied about being on the pill four months ago. FML

#8366883
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29367) - you deserved it (6887)

On 02/17/2010 at 3:15am - health - by Daddy. (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, after recently having had surgery, I Iearnt that some extra tissue was needed to cover up the hole in the roof of my mouth. Where did they get this tissue? From a dead person. I now have the flesh of a dead person in my mouth, which by the way is now infected. FML

#8361510
287 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35923) - you deserved it (3084)

On 02/17/2010 at 12:07am - health - by Sophie - United States (Texas)

Today, I was docked and fined in my dorm building because of multiple noise complaints. What was I doing that was so noisy? I slipped in the shower and banged my head against the floor. Then when I reached for the towel rack to pull myself up, it broke and I slammed my wrist onto the ground. FML

#8329398
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20747) - you deserved it (1699)

On 02/16/2010 at 2:26am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, while running, I sped up to show off for a cute female runner I'd seen before up ahead. I passed her and not more than a minute later she sprints past me. I couldn't catch up. She not only out ran me, but waited to tell me it was a 'nice try'. FML

#8327951
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5734) - you deserved it (27156)

On 02/16/2010 at 1:32am - health - by Out Ran - United States (Iowa)

Today, I had my first ice skating lesson. I had to wait 5 years for a rink to open in my town, 2 weeks for my lessons to begin, but only 10 minutes to fall and hit my tailbone so hard that I can't walk. FML

#8300373
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19424) - you deserved it (3481)

On 02/15/2010 at 1:40pm - health - by skatergrrrl (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I woke up thinking after wearing glasses and contacts all my life that I had miraculously been corrected to 20/20. Turns out I had just fallen asleep with my contacts in. FML

#8287074
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8515) - you deserved it (26523)

On 02/15/2010 at 2:44am - health - by kiriakousauce21 - Sent from mobile version

Today, I realized that the "pimples" on my back weren't pimples at all. Because I was unable to see how bad they were for the last week, I never caught on to the fact the they were, in fact, ticks. FML

#8242645
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32262) - you deserved it (5763)

On 02/14/2010 at 9:21am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my neighbor's dog bit me, it was extremely painful. The gash in my leg was deep and bleeding like crazy. When I finally got into my house screaming in agonizing pain, my mother said "Quit bitching, walk it off and you'll be fine." My leg is purple now. FML

#8230372
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20723) - you deserved it (2054)

On 02/14/2010 at 12:07am - health - by dogbait - Sent from mobile version



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