Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, I had to get bloodwork done. I'm deathly afraid of needles. The whole lobby heard me scream as soon as the nurse said 'hello'. FML

#12082057
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16796) - you deserved it (24989)

On 07/24/2010 at 6:50am - health - by breathexali (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I found out how much it hurts to be shot with a paintball in your open mouth. My mouth was only open to say I was hit. FML

#12072819
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29547) - you deserved it (6806)

On 07/23/2010 at 9:30pm - health - by owowowow - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was reaching for something in the back of the refrigerator. The bottle of hot sauce that was in front of it fell and broke. Not only did the glass cut my feet up, but the hot sauce got in the fresh wounds. FML

#12071239
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34054) - you deserved it (3978)

On 07/23/2010 at 8:06pm - health - by fiery (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I came home to my boyfriend wearing one of my pads on his hand, because he didn't want to pay to go to the hospital for stitches. FML

#12022109
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27941) - you deserved it (3656)

On 07/21/2010 at 9:52am - health - by blank - United States

Today, I cycled past a group of middle school kids. They decided that they should all start shouting "FAT ALERT" while ringing the bells on their bikes. FML

#12011441
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26633) - you deserved it (6451)

On 07/20/2010 at 9:57pm - health - by fattysonparade (woman) - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, my best friend told me I lost weight. I was happy because I've worked hard to shed off those pounds. I asked her what changes were evident, she told me that I now have a neck. FML

#11953086
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25733) - you deserved it (9128)

On 07/18/2010 at 12:02am - health - by lalala (woman) - Philippines (Manila)

Today, the airport security guard told me to lift my fat rolls so he could finish patting me down. FML

#11935766
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22081) - you deserved it (42860)

On 07/17/2010 at 2:16am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my wife, daughter, and I get to spend the next 4 hours in the ER. Why? Because we're all throwing up at the same time. At least it counts as a family activity. FML

#11911346
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26370) - you deserved it (2991)

On 07/16/2010 at 12:17am - health - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, I went to the dentist. My dentist kept talking to me while his hands were in my mouth. I attempted to tell him that it was difficult and dangerous to respond. My talking made him slip and slice my mouth open with one of his instruments. FML

#11902145
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30857) - you deserved it (8989)

On 07/15/2010 at 3:53pm - health - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, I've recently gained weight so I bought an exercise video. I started it right away in my room on the top floor. My younger sister screamed and ran outside a few minutes later. She thought it was an earthquake. FML

#11865183
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34261) - you deserved it (9371)

On 07/14/2010 at 12:32am - health - by sarah - United States

Today, I flew a toy airplane into my face. FML

#11848419
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10482) - you deserved it (36098)

On 07/13/2010 at 9:41am - health - by E or - United States (Oregon)

Today, I drew a face on a balloon and pretended to make out with it. The balloon popped and shot to the back of my throat, where it got caught. FML

#11831310
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11422) - you deserved it (65193)

On 07/12/2010 at 3:42pm - health - by jazthefish (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I noticed that I've gained so much weight that even my feet have stretch marks. FML

#11824802
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14462) - you deserved it (45282)

On 07/12/2010 at 3:52am - health - by fat - United States



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