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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, I got circumcised by my zipper. FML

#16205540
347 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65496) - you deserved it (10132)

On 05/16/2011 at 12:33pm - health - by Bobby M - Ireland (Carlow)

Today, I spilt a very hot cup of tea all over a burn I got yesterday from spilling a very hot cup of tea. FML

#16204397
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19351) - you deserved it (36557)

On 05/16/2011 at 10:28am - health - by foolmetwice (woman) -

Today, I learned the hard way that an ice cube is capable of ripping the skin off your bottom lip. FML

#16173128
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24995) - you deserved it (13412)

On 05/14/2011 at 3:06pm - health - by bloodyLIP - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was taking a dump and I pushed so hard that I got light headed and passed out on the floor. FML

#16168525
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38854) - you deserved it (13549)

On 05/14/2011 at 6:43am - health - by BrownDump - United States

Today, my mom said she wanted me to get laser eye surgery before she did, "Just in case it isn't safe." FML

#16158783
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36586) - you deserved it (2878)

On 05/13/2011 at 3:18pm - health - by samadams42 - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I saw my dad chugging a beer in the garage. Why is that so bad? He was hosting an AA meeting in the basement. FML

#16150933
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31856) - you deserved it (2687)

On 05/12/2011 at 10:19pm - health - by Eric -

Today, on the school bus, I rapped on a window in an attempt to get my friend's attention. A guy sitting behind me took this as an opportunity to shove my face into the window, breaking my nose. FML

#16146603
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33315) - you deserved it (5072)

On 05/12/2011 at 5:45pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I got a paper cut from a 'get well soon' card. FML

#16140473
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38907) - you deserved it (5448)

On 05/12/2011 at 3:54am - health - by Anonymous -

Today, my doctor told me I should consider a breast reduction. I'm a man. FML

#16136460
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36498) - you deserved it (12939)

On 05/11/2011 at 10:20pm - health - by anonymous -

Today, I discovered what it feels like to get a ruptured sinus. More specifically, I discovered what it feels like to get a ruptured sinus from being hit in the face by a pigeon that was deflected from the windscreen of a van moving at about 35mph. FML

#16131734
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30505) - you deserved it (2604)

On 05/11/2011 at 5:17pm - health - by pigeons_suck (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I discovered my boyfriend is incredibly ticklish on the bottom of his feet. Trying to be a bit flirty, I slowly slid two fingers down his calf and mockingly tickled his feet. He reacted by inadvertently elbowing me in the nose, nearly breaking it. FML

#16128165
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10737) - you deserved it (41041)

On 05/11/2011 at 10:10am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, I puked up a centipede. FML

#16126004
253 comments

Today, I learned what a nail gun shooting my leg feels like. FML

#16113761
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30750) - you deserved it (11496)

On 05/10/2011 at 1:12am - health - by Anonymous -



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