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Today, we finally got wireless Internet. My mom won't let us open any doors or windows in fear that it might "let the Internet out". It's 103 degrees in here. FML

#16464662
342 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58953) - you deserved it (4527)

On 06/02/2011 at 5:45am - health - by meyo555 - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I applied for a dental insurance that claims "you cannot be denied". I was denied. FML

#16464062
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32278) - you deserved it (3326)

On 06/02/2011 at 3:26am - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my daughter called for me to come into the bathroom. Turns out the tummy ache she'd been complaining of was actually parasites in her digestive tract. I could swear they were looking at me from the toilet. FML

#16432657
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38884) - you deserved it (5016)

On 05/31/2011 at 8:44am - health - by mrsekko - United States

Today, my only motivation to get out of bed was cupcakes in the refrigerator. FML

#16416160
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30417) - you deserved it (15868)

On 05/30/2011 at 10:59am - health - by skigal24 - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found out my mom intentionally puts extra butter and oil in the food she cooks for me because she wants me to be fatter than her. FML

#16355568
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56371) - you deserved it (3597)

On 05/26/2011 at 10:24am - health - by fatteningmeup (woman) - United States

Today, I finally got the wedding dress I've been waiting months to see. It turns out that my mom ordered the dress 2 sizes smaller than my size, this way it will be "an incentive to lose weight". FML

#16350692
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36701) - you deserved it (5882)

On 05/25/2011 at 11:19pm - health - by Angelica - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while I was mowing the lawn in my backyard, I ran over a glass bottle. My legs looked like a disco ball. FML

#16325650
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35759) - you deserved it (8689)

On 05/24/2011 at 8:33am - health - by tash (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had to go to the emergency room with vision problems. The nurse was helping my mom fill out the paperwork. When asked for her employer, my mom started trying to sell the nurse Aflac, and got into a serious 10 minute conversation about it, all while I'm going blind in my left eye. FML

#16314169
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31270) - you deserved it (2785)

On 05/23/2011 at 3:33pm - health - by Catherine - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was talking to this boy I really like and we were laughing together, until I got this disgusting putrid smell. I started to say how awful the smell was and he stopped laughing to take a sniff too. As soon as he closed his mouth the smell was gone. FML

#16292303
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44381) - you deserved it (4248)

On 05/22/2011 at 2:30am - health - by ninalian - United States (Puerto Rico)

Today, on my metro ride home, I sat next to a woman who thought it was appropriate to continually scratch at her scalp and then eat her 'scalp pickings'. When I looked over at her hair, I could see scabs clumped together from her previous scratching sessions. FML

Today, I'm the coach of a football team. To celebrate winning a game, they poured a cooler of blue Gatorade over my head. This would've been great, if not for the fact that I'm highly allergic to blue food dye. FML

#16256468
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38390) - you deserved it (3225)

On 05/19/2011 at 7:32pm - health - by blue. -

Today, I ate some hardboiled eggs for breakfast, not knowing they were practically rotten. My whole day has consisted of vomit-inducing sulfuric farts and diarrhea. FML

#16234308
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28942) - you deserved it (8906)

On 05/18/2011 at 3:26am - health - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I went to the doctor for a sore throat. The doctor wasn't wearing any shoes. He said that he doesn't believe in pharmaceuticals and that it's 'all about vitamins', and he gave me a flyer for a vitamin mail order company. Then he showed me photos of his holidays. FML

#16232810
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32069) - you deserved it (4108)

On 05/18/2011 at 12:38am - health - by Anonymous - Australia



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