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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I went directly from the shopping mall to the hospital. My sister had slammed my hand in the car door, all because I considered purchasing a dress that looked like something she might buy for herself. FML

#21235533
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39252) - you deserved it (2957)

On 08/12/2014 at 1:34am - health - by vicious_fashion (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, I had a seizure while at the airport, ready to go on vacation with my family. We ended up missing our flight. My mom spent most of the ride home making cracks about how I'm always ruining things with my "dramatics". Sorry that I have epilepsy, mom. FML

#21232741
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47488) - you deserved it (2855)

On 08/08/2014 at 7:25pm - health - by Anonymous - Sweden (Vasternorrlands Lan)

Today, as a last resort for my back problems, I tried acupuncture. After the needles were placed and the doctor had left, I couldn't move for 30 minutes. I had a panic attack. FML

#21232393
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35128) - you deserved it (4252)

On 08/08/2014 at 8:26am - health - by screwed - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I went with my girlfriend to the gym for the first time. I knew I was in bad shape, but I bet her that I could lift more than her. Not only did I get my ass handed to me by a 5', 115lbs girl in front of the entire gym, I also have to attend Zumba in bright pink spandex. FML

#21231691
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26276) - you deserved it (37871)

On 08/07/2014 at 11:36am - health - by Dancing King (man) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, my husband was disgusted by me expressing breast milk while we were in the shower together. This is the same man who thinks it's funny to pee on my legs because, "It'll wash off." FML

#21229021
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42454) - you deserved it (4182)

On 08/04/2014 at 1:42am - health - by Ew?Really? (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I confided to my grandma that I'm suffering from depression and I feel like a burden to everyone. She replied that her grandpa used to suffer from depression too, but that he'd cured himself in the end, namely by committing suicide. Thanks, grandma, thanks. FML

#21226890
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39339) - you deserved it (3550)

On 08/01/2014 at 4:09pm - health - by lacieQ (woman) - Canada

Today, I had trouble carrying a box upstairs because my arms were sore from working out. My mom asked me, "Why are you working out so much then?" I didn't have the heart to tell her it was because of her 100-pound weight gain and that I didn't want to end up looking like her. FML

#21225648
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39740) - you deserved it (6161)

On 07/31/2014 at 7:51am - health - by jogginglikeitsmyjob (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I had to go to the hospital to get blood taken. The nurse mentioned how pronounced and easy to see my veins are. I guess that explains why she missed five times in a row. I'm surprised my arm doesn't look like a heroin addict's right now. FML

#21222027
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36311) - you deserved it (2510)

On 07/27/2014 at 12:13pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, the fire alarm went off at work. My office is on the second floor, and the door to the stairs were jammed shut. The only way out was jumping out the window. The best part was breaking my leg due to someone burning their lunch. FML

#21218720
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42192) - you deserved it (7734)

On 07/23/2014 at 9:34pm - health - by timv94 (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I was so ashamed of my weight when I sat down and the suction of my thighs made a loud fart noise, I admitted to it being a fart rather than my fat rolls. FML

#21218616
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33294) - you deserved it (18211)

On 07/23/2014 at 7:24pm - health - by ThunderThighs (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I went to my weekly AA meeting. It was a huge crowd and I was the guest speaker. Not 5 minutes into my speech, I was booed off stage and banned from further attendance because I accidentally wore a Jack Daniel's shirt. FML

#21217633
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21211) - you deserved it (49767)

On 07/22/2014 at 7:20pm - health - by dypshyyt - United States (Florida)

Today, I taught my 23-year-old boyfriend how to correctly brush his teeth. FML

#21209921
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38552) - you deserved it (5771)

On 07/15/2014 at 5:24pm - health - by stinky breath - United States (California)

Today, my mom and dad played rock, paper, scissors over who gets to spend the night with me in the hospital tonight while I have surgery. FML

#21209860
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45592) - you deserved it (3655)

On 07/15/2014 at 4:11pm - health - by smh (woman) - United States



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