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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I was punched in the face because my uncontrollable hiccups were "annoying". FML

#21250817
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35119) - you deserved it (3798)

On 09/02/2014 at 10:13pm - health - by soccer8goalie - United States (West Virginia)

Today, while my orthodontist was working on my teeth, she made the comment, "Wow! It looks like a murder scene in there!" FML

#21250795
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31996) - you deserved it (4743)

On 09/02/2014 at 9:35pm - health - by Gee... Thanks (man) -

Today, my roommate came back from camping. My toothbrush magically reappeared as well. FML

#21250056
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34592) - you deserved it (2791)

On 09/01/2014 at 9:53pm - health - by germophobe (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was hiking down a steep hill, and I slipped. I instinctively grabbed the nearest object to me: a very prickly cactus. FML

#21249060
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34428) - you deserved it (3135)

On 08/31/2014 at 1:51pm - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my brother thought jumping out and punching me in the stomach would cure my hiccups. Yeah. Didn't work. FML

#21246592
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32689) - you deserved it (2721)

On 08/27/2014 at 5:56pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I got my wisdom teeth removed. All I can remember is crying to my mom because I thought spoons were taking over the world. FML

Today, while my teacher was demonstrating how to use the ultrasound equipment, we all figured out that I'm pregnant. FML

#21245451
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50366) - you deserved it (9705)

On 08/25/2014 at 10:37pm - health - by whotouchedyou1 - United States (Texas)

Today, I was trying to fix a broken desk fan. I'd taken the guard off and was trying to unscrew the blades, when my roommate decided it'd be funny to plug it in. The blades sliced into my thumb. I need stitches, and he still thinks it's hilarious. FML

#21245038
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39040) - you deserved it (3886)

On 08/25/2014 at 12:17pm - health - by sharkgirl4 - United States (California)

Today, it's the 16th day of my period. FML

#21241406
294 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64268) - you deserved it (4103)

On 08/20/2014 at 1:15am - health - by BagelTheOtaku (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my new doctor gave me a breast exam and said everything was healthy, before adding "Well, I think so, anyway. I don't actually work here." As I freaked out, he laughed out loud, said he was just kidding, and that he should prescribe me a chill pill. FML

#21241090
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41514) - you deserved it (5685)

On 08/19/2014 at 4:46pm - health - by humdrummitydrum (woman) - United States

Today, I found out that my doctor wasn't kidding when he said "sudden diarrhea may occur" with my new medication. I learned this while walking my dog a mile away from my house. FML

Today, while taking out the trash, I swung the bag back and forth, which caused it to slide across my leg. An opened aluminum can inside the bag ended up slicing through my calf, causing heavy bleeding. Baked beans sent me to the hospital. FML

Today, I was chatting with the cute new receptionist at the gym. I told her that I would be going there more if she was there. She looked me up and down and said that I should go regardless. FML

#21237096
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34171) - you deserved it (14000)

On 08/13/2014 at 11:46pm - health - by fatty (man) - United States (Wisconsin)



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  • So, is everyone back from their vacation? Can we get back to regular programming? No? OK, I get it. You're all still crying about not being at the beach any more, well, I am anyway. And this time of year…

Thursday 11 September 2014

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