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Today, my dick of a neighbor tried to file a noise complaint against me, all because I have the flu and am sneezing a lot. FML

#21464483
5 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71) - you deserved it (5)

On 09/04/2015 at 11:48am - health - by ACCCHHHOOOO!!!!!!!!! -_- (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, after the doctor poking around my urethra and vagina at a lump. She turns to me and says, "I'm going to be honest, I have no idea what that is. Have some antibiotics and we'll see how it goes in two weeks." Excuse me while I go panic in a corner. FML

#21463826
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17269) - you deserved it (1083)

On 09/02/2015 at 5:10pm - health - by freakingout (woman) - United Kingdom (Coventry)

Today, my doctor informed me that the tests we've been doing the previous months show no sign of leukemia. I was just about to express my relief when he casually followed up with, "Never mind, there's still a lot of other blood-related diseases we need to look out for." FML

#21463645
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19516) - you deserved it (1153)

On 09/02/2015 at 6:09am - health - by Lily (woman) - Austria (Wien)

Today, I went to the orthodontist, and found out when I was supposed to get my braces off. His exact words, "You'll get them off around Christmas... but we're not sure what year." FML

#21463569
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19831) - you deserved it (1341)

On 09/01/2015 at 11:55pm - health - by KenzoBVB - Canada

Today, at soccer, I repeatedly asked my coach for water as I was feeling light headed. His response every time was, "5 more minutes". Eventually, I got so dehydrated that I passed out. The first thing my coach said when I woke up was, "Why didn't you get some water?" FML

#21463299
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24343) - you deserved it (2158)

On 09/01/2015 at 7:07am - health - by Dehydrated - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I put aside my weekend plans to help my aunt with the extermination guy spraying her new house down to prevent cockroaches. After he left, my aunt asked me to go in and turn off the lights because the fumes were very deadly. If I chose not to, she would tell my mom I did nothing all day. FML

#21462982
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21747) - you deserved it (1718)

On 08/31/2015 at 1:17pm - health - by Rakib (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was hit by acute food poisoning while attending a colleague's birthday party at his home. The toilet had a door that wouldn't close all the way, there were only three sheets of toilet paper left, and I had to walk home through town, in a dress, with my soiled underwear in a plastic bag. FML

#21462484
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21062) - you deserved it (1484)

On 08/30/2015 at 7:29am - health - by monkeywrench (woman) - Sweden

Today, I blacked out while hugging my dad. I woke up a minute later on the floor with my dad telling me to, "quit being lazy and get up." FML

#21462123
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17140) - you deserved it (1262)

On 08/29/2015 at 1:08pm - health - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my doctor died. Last week, after a check up I'd had because I was worried about a cough, he told me not to worry because I was as healthy as he was. FML

#21462016
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24327) - you deserved it (1673)

On 08/29/2015 at 4:50am - health - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I had to call the doctor regarding my penis. Not because of erectile dysfunction or an erection lasting more than four hours, but because of the multiple fire ant bites I woke up to after falling asleep in my backyard. FML

#21461585
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20496) - you deserved it (3556)

On 08/28/2015 at 2:13am - health - by unsuckable (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I found out that the medicine I've been taking for my headaches is responsible for my headaches getting even worse. FML

Today, due to medication I am taking that causes constipation, I have become all too accustomed to using a disposable rubber glove to dig crap out of my own butthole. FML

#21461256
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24047) - you deserved it (2062)

On 08/27/2015 at 6:56am - health - by jack - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I've reached the point in my life where the "Apply to affected area" label on acne cream essentially means I need to take a bath in the stuff. FML

#21460776
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22125) - you deserved it (1752)

On 08/26/2015 at 12:33am - health - by Whiteheads - United States (Texas)



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