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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I was at the airport trying to help a man get to the right terminal. When he finished he turned to tell me "Don't worry, your English is pretty good, considering you're not American". English is my only language. FML

#29771
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28946) - you deserved it (4594)

On 02/12/2009 at 2:07am - misc - by language barriers (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend and I broke up. I said that at least I was always there for him when he needed me. He said "When did I need you?" FML

#29762
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31565) - you deserved it (5553)

On 02/12/2009 at 2:04am - misc - by rainyday (woman) - United States (California)

Today, at work, a man walked up the escalator with his chubby kid next to him and asked me where the shoe section was. I said, "For you or your son?" He said, "For my daughter." FML

#29521
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11765) - you deserved it (30505)

On 02/12/2009 at 1:13am - misc - by Mal2222 (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I went to a movie with my boyfriend. In the lobby, I asked why the glasses were not working. I said, "Do they only work inside the theater?" My boyfriend replied, "3-D glasses just work inside the movie, everything else in the World is pretty much 3-D." FML

#29434
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10317) - you deserved it (121015)

On 02/12/2009 at 1:00am - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I got a text message. It said, "I'm so drunk. What you up to, girl?" It was my dad. FML

#27684
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73165) - you deserved it (3847)

On 02/11/2009 at 9:09pm - misc - by sober (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I told the guy I have feelings for that I'm interested in, and asked him how he feels about it. He responded via text, saying, "I feel fairly neutral about that." FML

#26983
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28340) - you deserved it (3625)

On 02/11/2009 at 7:06pm - misc - by iwantpizza69 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I told my mom, "I love you". She responded with, "What? I never told you I loved you." FML

#26936
24 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40878) - you deserved it (2460)

On 02/11/2009 at 6:57pm - misc - by chee (woman) - United States (California)

Today, when my husband got home from work, I was standing in the kitchen, wearing nothing but stilletos. He asked me to make him hot chocolate. FML

#26905
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55142) - you deserved it (5887)

On 02/11/2009 at 6:52pm - misc - by sissica (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, as I sat on the table in my gynecologist's office for my yearly checkup, I realized that was the most action I got in the past year. FML

#25767
15 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38475) - you deserved it (7472)

On 02/11/2009 at 3:04pm - misc - by dynomyte (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my mom and I were looking at pictures from the beach. She goes, "That is a REALLY ugly picture of Michelle" (my cousin). The picture was of me. FML

#25739
14 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32274) - you deserved it (2171)

On 02/11/2009 at 2:57pm - misc - by bm (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my boyfriend told me he was going to take me out somewhere special, so I called in sick for work. Turns out he had made reservations for the restaurant I worked at. FML

#24997
20 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32636) - you deserved it (7695)

On 02/11/2009 at 11:51am - misc - by seriously?! (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I cut myself on a band-aid box, while trying to get one out for another cut. FML

#24664
23 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34210) - you deserved it (7483)

On 02/11/2009 at 9:45am - misc - by Chicketi (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, having just told me what a great job I've been doing and how he'd really like to start giving me some more responsibility, my boss asked me if I'd sharpen a couple of pencils for him. FML

#24601
14 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27181) - you deserved it (2220)

On 02/11/2009 at 9:08am - misc - by Killmenow (woman) - United Kingdom (Bedfordshire)



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