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Today, I was sitting in a restaurant with my best friend. We had just competed in a pageant together earlier this month. A lady comes up to my friend who got first alternate and said,"You were robbed of that title. You deserved to win. I hated the winner." I was the winner. FML

#248293
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48776) - you deserved it (5079)

On 03/09/2009 at 12:16am - misc - by frosho (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I was so drunk that my friends put me to bed during a party. Later I find out that while I was passed out two of my friends came in and had sex while I was in the same bed. They tried to use me as a prop. Now my friends call me the love wedge. FML

#245374
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66492) - you deserved it (21563)

On 03/08/2009 at 8:25pm - intimacy - by lovewedge (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was walking down the street when I passed a construction site. All of the workers started making a fuss and whistling, etc. Naturally, I got very flustered. I stood still for a second and faced them. One yelled for me to move because I was in the way of a girl at a stop light. FML

#244881
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58822) - you deserved it (12652)

On 03/08/2009 at 7:40pm - intimacy - by Noname (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I called up the boy I like to ask him on a date. He said "Haha, thats a pretty good impression Chris. Next time pick someone less ugly and maybe I'd think this is real." He thought I was his friend prank calling him. FML

#243947
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (82089) - you deserved it (4335)

On 03/08/2009 at 5:58pm - love - by Depressed (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, a guy informed me that the cute, really tiny little leather bracelet with little silver hearts and several snaps that I'd found in a head shop is actually a cock ring. I'm a girl. FML

#243241
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39156) - you deserved it (11444)

On 03/08/2009 at 4:35pm - misc - by fashionVictim (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was babysitting a 7 year old girl and we were eating chocolate covered nuts. She kept on chewing the nuts and wondered where the chocolate was. I told her to taste the chocolate you suck on the nuts. Then her parents came home and the first thing she said was "I learned how to suck nuts!" FML

#242557
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50860) - you deserved it (9796)

On 03/08/2009 at 3:08pm - kids - by nutsucker (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, at work, I was alone in the breakroom when I got a slight pain in my belly. I thought I needed to pass gas, so I tried since no one else was in there. It wasn't gas. It was diarrhea. I'm wearing a mini skirt today. FML

#242337
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61697) - you deserved it (18052)

On 03/08/2009 at 2:37pm - work - by squirty_joe (woman) - United States

Today, someone stole my phone at a concert. They decided it would be funny to text my mom saying I was pregnant. FML

#242158
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58854) - you deserved it (4403)

On 03/08/2009 at 2:10pm - misc - by kelsey (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, the man I have been dating for 3 weeks, who told me he owns a high end restaurant in the city, handed me my lunch order through the drive-thru at Wendy's. FML

#241205
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57342) - you deserved it (9133)

On 03/08/2009 at 10:39am - misc - by marge1010 (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was looking at some comments on a silly YouTube video of me dancing with some friends. Someone posted a comment saying "Girl on the right is hot!!!." Next to that, it had about 31 thumbs down. I'm the girl on the right. FML

#240683
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44504) - you deserved it (9225)

On 03/08/2009 at 4:47am - misc - by Ugly (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was going over to my friends house for dinner, (it was my birthday) when I walked in everyone yelled surprise and then turned on the lights. When my friend looked over at me she said "wrong person guys, turn off the lights". FML

#240271
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55068) - you deserved it (2777)

On 03/08/2009 at 3:16am - misc - by PmS (woman) - United States (Wyoming)

Today, I was driving on the freeway in the back seat of my friends car. I looked over to the left and was greeted by a van full of adolescent boys waving and making the "call me" hand gesture. I then happened to looked down and realized that my right boob was completely out of my top. FML

#240249
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16060) - you deserved it (48677)

On 03/08/2009 at 3:11am - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I bragged to a coworker that our boss compliments me constantly on my work performance, my fashion sense, and my trustworthiness. She then directed me to a "neighborhood watch" website. My boss is a registered sex offender. FML

#239569
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50595) - you deserved it (7260)

On 03/08/2009 at 12:47am - intimacy - by Kat (woman) - United States (Colorado)



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