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Today, I finally told my best friend whom I've secretly been in love with for two years that I was in love with her but at the last second chickened out and said I was joking. She replied with "Don't scare me like that. I thought I was going to have to find a new best friend for a second" FML

#230798
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63989) - you deserved it (6487)

On 03/06/2009 at 11:17pm - love - by crap (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I went to visit my Grandmother, accidentally leaving my phone home during the weekend. When I got back I had 2 texts from my crush. One saying "I want to take the most beautiful girl to prom, go with me?" and the other saying, "Fine fattie, I'll ask someone else." FML

#229986
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71098) - you deserved it (6899)

On 03/06/2009 at 9:55pm - love - by promdump (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I got a letter from my college saying that if my tuition was not paid in the next 24 hours, I will be terminated from classes. Turns out account services has been depositing my tuition money in another student’s account whose social security number was one digit different from mine. FML

#229421
43 comments

Today, I overheard my parents having sex. Trying to be the reasonable person I was, I dismissed it, realizing that sex is just normal. I quickly walked past their room when my cat ran past me into their room, cracking open the door. Now my parents think I was peeping and need therapy. FML

#228831
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71374) - you deserved it (4696)

On 03/06/2009 at 7:41pm - intimacy - by Kathrynn (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was working at Target when an old woman asked me if I could help her find her favorite bra. I asked what brand it was when she replied "I'll check the tag". She lifted up the front of her shirt, and flipped one cup of her bra inside out. I saw everything. FML

#228106
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61647) - you deserved it (3826)

On 03/06/2009 at 6:11pm - work - by laurenmay (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, while out to lunch, my sister called me and asked me to pick her up from the mall. I told her she'd have to wait. She got pissed off and started cursing at me, so I hung up on her. She called me back 37 times until I answered and yelled "WILL YOU LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE?" It was my boss. FML

#227802
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19680) - you deserved it (47062)

On 03/06/2009 at 5:31pm - misc - by jacks_smirking_revenge (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I flew home early from a two month trip to Europe to surprise my boyfriend on his birthday. When I got to his house with a home baked cake from scratch and a quilt with slik-screened pictures from my trip, his roommate answered the door and said "Oh sorry, he's out with his girlfriend." FML

#227121
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61607) - you deserved it (3359)

On 03/06/2009 at 4:07pm - love - by Muscle (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out my four best friends are going to Florida for spring break without me. When asked why I was not invited to go with them the answer I received was, "we don't think you would look very good in a bathing suit, and we want to be able to pick up cute guys on the beach." FML

#226392
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62424) - you deserved it (5698)

On 03/06/2009 at 2:13pm - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was writing an email to our entire company regarding a fundraiser we are taking part in for children and adults with disabilities. I was rushing to get the email out and hit send before I realized that instead of "Best Regards" I had typed "Best Retards" as the closing line. FML

#226271
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26650) - you deserved it (36910)

On 03/06/2009 at 1:53pm - work - by Can't Spell Worth A Damn (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was boarding my flight when I got pulled aside for looking suspicious. As she was opening my bag, I said, "Be careful, I jammed so many clothes in there it may explode." I was then strip searched for my trouble. FML

#225993
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14490) - you deserved it (44070)

On 03/06/2009 at 12:58pm - misc - by thebickster (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I yelled at my little brother for leaving the toilet seat up and told him he needed to go around the house and make sure they were all down. I went to the bathroom later to find that the toilet seats and covers from every toilet had all been removed and were sitting on my bed. FML

#225937
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14821) - you deserved it (62106)

On 03/06/2009 at 12:49pm - kids - by wetbutt (woman) - United States (Connecticut)



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