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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, My friend and I were stopped at a red light while it was pouring rain. We heard a screeching noise off in the distance and thought, "Hope someone doesn't get hit." Someone did get hit. We did. From behind. FML

#915391
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46375) - you deserved it (2989)

On 04/11/2009 at 2:38pm - misc - by RainyDay (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my boyfriend, and best friend, had baked a cake, and wouldnt tell anyone who it was for. When I asked he said I'd know soon. He met me after class to break up with me and offered me the cake to make me feel better. FML

#915379
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63530) - you deserved it (3051)

On 04/11/2009 at 2:38pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was sitting at my computer, listening and singing along to some music. I started singing louder, thinking that I was pretty good. Just then, my mom comes barging through the door in a frenzy saying, "Are you all right? Are you hurt?" FML

#914875
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37747) - you deserved it (13347)

On 04/11/2009 at 1:36pm - misc - by awesome (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was training for my new job at a restaurant. As part of training, they give you free food so you know what to reccommend, and the dish I got was really good. Eight hours later I saw it again while I was puking; I got food poisoning from my own place of work. FML

#914179
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47751) - you deserved it (2934)

On 04/11/2009 at 12:12pm - work - by newhostess (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, as I was walking into CVS, two older men outside said to me "Young lady, please consider us on your way out." Thinking they were hitting on me, I rolled my eyes and said "Screw you." When I walked back outside, I realized they were asking for AIDS donations. FML

#912798
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8434) - you deserved it (78061)

On 04/11/2009 at 9:23am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I spent 3 hours trying to close a simple $400 deal with a homeowner. He spent 3 hours telling me about his life story including his marital problems, his philosophical views of the world, AND he read me 20 pages of haiku poems. Only 3 hours later did he tell me he couldn't accept my deal. FML

#911885
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50877) - you deserved it (5639)

On 04/11/2009 at 4:42am - money - by canabana (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went to Britney's concert. About halfway through the show, the person next to me turns to me and asks, "Can you do me a favour?" Thinking that she wanted me to look after her stuff, I said sure. Her next sentence was: "Can you stop singing?" FML

#911681
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31279) - you deserved it (39114)

On 04/11/2009 at 4:07am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my friend and I were driving to Florida from Michigan. While going through Ohio my car hydroplaned over a puddle on the highway. I ended up hitting the median and my car got wrecked. Not only am I stuck in Ohio with a car that wont work, I got a ticket for $300 for hitting Ohio property. FML

#909253
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40604) - you deserved it (5826)

On 04/10/2009 at 11:40pm - misc - by emie0209 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was in class finishing up an assignment when the guy next to me, my crush, said "I really love your hair." I started to blush then I turned towards him and said thanks, at the same time as the girl he was actually talking to. FML

#907713
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42552) - you deserved it (5686)

On 04/10/2009 at 9:47pm - misc - by bastardddd (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my father, who I rarely see, drove 400 miles to my wedding. I was so happy to see him, until he got completely trashed at my reception, asked me where he could "score some weed" and told me what a bitch my mom was and how I needed to lose weight. For over an hour. At my wedding. FML

#907483
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73815) - you deserved it (3474)

On 04/10/2009 at 9:10pm - misc - by JeezyCherieze (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was babysitting a five year old boy. Somehow the topic of relationships came up, he asked me if I had a boyfriend. When I told him that I was single, he got all excited and asked if he could be my boyfriend. It would have been cute except he was the first guy to ever ask me out. I'm 18. FML

#904176
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60285) - you deserved it (5560)

On 04/10/2009 at 5:07pm - kids - by boyfriendless (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend's friends were throwing him a surprise birthday party. I thought it'd be funny to get him some fuzzy handcuffs and a box of condoms as a gift. They never told me they invited his parents. FML

#903514
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16178) - you deserved it (44795)

On 04/10/2009 at 4:07pm - misc - by Brittany (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, brand new cocktail dress: $300. Matching peep toe heels: $100. Getting my hair done at the salon: $80. Treating myself to a mani/pedi: $50. When finally meeting the guy I have been chatting online with for 2 months, I find out he's my cousin: priceless. FML



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