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2day while laying out , I kept feeling something misty , like a spray bottle. Curious as to what it was since it kept coming , I looked up , only to see the painters were peeing over the side of the house , and the heavy breeze was turning there piss into a refreshing mist 4 me. FML

#2634152
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58766) - you deserved it (3644)

On 06/05/2009 at 3:47pm - misc - by layout (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

I WAS AT A CLUB WIT A FRIEND . A CUTE GUY KEPT SMILING AN LOOKING OVER AT ME . HE LEFT IS SEAT AN WENT TO TE BAR AN BROUGT BACK TWO DRINKS . HE WAVD ME OVER AN TEN SAID, "CAN YOU TELL YOUR OT FRIEND TAT I BOUGT ER A DRINK?" FML

#2634105
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56688) - you deserved it (4612)

On 06/05/2009 at 3:46pm - intimacy - by KL (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

today I was working as a waitres at a wedding. I was trying to clear the table as quickly as possible and decided to place a half bowl of soup on top of the pile of plate I was carrying. As I was hurrying back to the kitchen I tripped and spilt the soup all over the bride's ivory dress. mega FML

#2631583
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47222) - you deserved it (24098)

On 06/05/2009 at 1:57pm - work - by badwaitress (woman) - United Kingdom (Newport)

Today , I had a 3rd date with a great guy. Over dinner , he told me that he wantd to see more of me. When I agred , he pulld out his schedule book and startd to tell me he was dating 5 other women besides me. He then told me what week in the ( rotation ) would be mine. He wasn't kidding. FML

#2624413
283 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59095) - you deserved it (4261)

On 06/05/2009 at 3:49am - misc - by shescomfortablynumb (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today I had the closing shift at work in a cafe an there was a man an lady left. I made them coffee an started to close up. When the lady finished her coffee she grabbed mah arm an said 'I think that man is masturbating' an leaves in a hurry. I had to wait 4 him to finish before closing. FML

#2624268
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60052) - you deserved it (3897)

On 06/05/2009 at 3:43am - intimacy - by MBG (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today , I Was Babysitting. I Was Sitting On The Sofa When I Felt That I Need To Ajust Mah Sitting Arangment. After Moving , I Felt A Small Toy Snap Under Me. The Little Boy Said It Was Fine. One Hour Later He Snuck Up On Me An Beat Me With An Umbrella For Breaking His Toy. FML

#2621619
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47969) - you deserved it (10411)

On 06/05/2009 at 1:25am - kids - by KPKallery (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today , I was taking a picture with my friend. Her camera can pick out a certain color an only have that color show up in the picture. She chose yellow because of the yellow on my dress. When she showed me the picture , the sash wasn't the only yellow thing; my teeth showed up , too. FML

#2619550
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41025) - you deserved it (16778)

On 06/05/2009 at 12:21am - misc - by becstar90 (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, on a plane home from Ireland, mah husbandho was severely hungover, vomitted in a bag before we took off. When he got up to put the bag in the bin the stewardess forced him to sit back down. I had to hold on to a bag full of vomit 4 a good few minuteshilst mah husband was passed out. FML

#2614376
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34434) - you deserved it (5009)

On 06/04/2009 at 10:04pm - health - by scarlett666 (woman) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, I had a date with this guy. I waitd at the restaurant 4 an hour and he didn't show. Thinking he stood me up, I went over to his place and keyd his car. Then I realizd the date was 4 tomorrow. FML

#2597926
623 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10864) - you deserved it (137961)

On 06/04/2009 at 1:09pm - misc - by soljaboy (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my fiancé of two years told me he was bored of me an he'd just prolonged the engagement to see if anyone more interesting would come along in the mean time. He was upset cuz no one did. FML

#2595343
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55313) - you deserved it (3102)

On 06/04/2009 at 10:46am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I went into work and noticd one of my fellow colleagues had a large bunch of flowers on her desk. As soon as I saw her, I immediately said, "Happy Brthday!" Everyone went quiet. It wasn't her brthday; her father had did. FML

#2594715
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20189) - you deserved it (53061)

On 06/04/2009 at 10:09am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today... I Was Driving On The Motorwayhen A Cop Car Made Me Stop. It Was A Routine Check Andhen They Said "Have You Been Drinking?" Of Course I Said No. To That... My 6 Year Old Sitting In The Back Screamd "Yes She Did! She's Lying I Saw Her Drink!" I Had Drunk A Milkshake. FML

#2593679
341 comments

I agree, your life sucks (101197) - you deserved it (6398)

On 06/04/2009 at 8:17am - kids - by Kimmiko (woman) - Germany (Niedersachsen)

Today, I was reading through a local wedding mag's advice page. A mother-in-law to be was writing about how to handle wanting her son to break off his engagement. I thought, "Wow. That must suck. I'm glad I lyk my mother-in-law to be." And then I saw her name. FML

#2593216
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69129) - you deserved it (3069)

On 06/04/2009 at 7:11am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States



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