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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I received 7 notifications on facebook. Girls in my grade were commenting on my photo because they knew the location of it. They then started to have a conversation and they planned a whole social event. On my photo. I wasn't invited. FML

#3669068
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46522) - you deserved it (3872)

On 07/11/2009 at 3:27pm - misc - by laurraaa (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I got a parking ticket for $150. It seems it was issued by my husband, who apparently can't remember license plate numbers. FML

#3668962
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42947) - you deserved it (29538)

On 07/11/2009 at 3:22pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend wanted to take me to a movie after days of not seeing me. This long awaited date involved me paying for food and my movie ticket when he ran out of cash again. He then dumped me as we left the theater walking to his car. Well, I financed my own breakup date. FML

#3667627
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44046) - you deserved it (4366)

On 07/11/2009 at 2:11pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, it was my wedding day. I had my butt clenched during the ceremony. I was giving my husband the ring, but dropped it. When I went to retrieve it, I let a huge one ripe. My husband yelled "she likes to eat beans." FML

#3666100
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56592) - you deserved it (9649)

On 07/11/2009 at 12:41pm - misc - by 1234 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I called my boyfriend and when he answered, I said the dirtiest thing I could think of to him on the phone. After a long silence, I heard, "Lacey? Is that you?" I accidentally called my dad. FML

#3664691
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18437) - you deserved it (66560)

On 07/11/2009 at 11:13am - intimacy - by crazyt446 (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, as I was bent over at my waitressing job an elderly woman walked by and smacked my ass. I looked at her, shocked, and she said, "It was too tempting with you bent over like that, I have a dirty old mind." I didn't know whether to be flattered or horrified. Maybe both. FML

#3661940
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44015) - you deserved it (5903)

On 07/11/2009 at 5:10am - work - by grannysmack (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, while working at McDonald's a car full of obnoxious teens came through. They had made a $30 order, and handed me a tin of small change, claiming that on a McDonald's ad they saw that we, employees, liked counting change. I had to count out $30 in spare change during a rush period at work. FML

#3659409
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50925) - you deserved it (4394)

On 07/11/2009 at 2:28am - work - by Meow (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I went with my sister to get our eyebrows waxed. I didn't think my eyebrows were that bad--and they weren't! When the guy waxed my eyebrows, he gestured my lips and said, "Moustache, too?" Mortified, I said, "No!" to which he replied, "Aw, someone no get kissy tonight." FML

#3658638
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40869) - you deserved it (9081)

On 07/11/2009 at 1:58am - misc - by RR (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my visiting cousin was driving me to pick-up and pay for my wedding cake at the bakery. The cops pulled him over for speeding and as it turns out his license was expired. I ended up having to use my wedding cake money to bail him out of jail. FML

#3657185
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37559) - you deserved it (2995)

On 07/11/2009 at 1:06am - misc - by mellbelle32 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my mum called and told me she had bought me a new, white dish washer for my apartment because it doesn't have one. I was SO excited and told her I'd pay her back as soon as I could. I only had to pay her $1.25. She bought me a sponge. FML

#3650725
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40328) - you deserved it (7838)

On 07/10/2009 at 9:09pm - money - by thanksalot (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I spent most of my morning comforting the guy I love because his fiancée dumped him for some other guy. He continuously told me I had no clue that kind of pain he was in. He dumped me three years ago for the girl that just left him. FML

#3646949
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56959) - you deserved it (8797)

On 07/10/2009 at 6:28pm - love - by Shadowfigure23 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend called me to break up with me. Immediately after we hung up, I started crying hysterically. I thought I dialed my best friend, and as soon as the line picked up, I yelled, "That motherfucker broke up with me!" My now ex-boyfriend replied, "Yeah, I know I did." FML

#3641578
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43910) - you deserved it (18534)

On 07/10/2009 at 2:47pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was at a second interview for a job that I really need as I got laid off last month. Midway through the interview, I went to cross my legs and realized I had 2 different shoes on. FML

#3637305
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35689) - you deserved it (19520)

On 07/10/2009 at 11:08am - work - by unemployed (woman) - United States (Colorado)



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