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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I was minding a 6-year old boy. He begged me to take him somewhere. I rang his Mum, and she said I could. He picked to go to McDonald's. He ordered chicken. After his meal, he told me he was vegetarian, and wanted to try some meat while his Mum wasn't around. I got the blame. FML

#6339843
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36585) - you deserved it (4150)

On 11/17/2009 at 9:50am - kids - by NewlyChildaphobic (woman) - Ireland (Cork)

Today, I was running a meeting feeling very stressed. I grabbed my stress ball out of my bag, squeezing it vigorously throughout the meeting. When I stood up to talk my stress ball exploded all over my new black suit and the desk. So much for relieving stress. FML

#6337825
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26758) - you deserved it (4038)

On 11/17/2009 at 2:21am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, after sleeping in, I finally sorted through a stack of mail I had been putting off and I found a Jury summons. Thinking it must be coming up soon, I checked the date, my appearance is scheduled for 7:45am on November 16th. Today is November 17th. FML

#6337405
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7940) - you deserved it (39272)

On 11/17/2009 at 1:34am - misc - by Nic (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was leaving the train station when a man came up to me and asked me if I have an unlimited metrocard to swipe him in. I did have an unlimited card so I told him sure. While taking out my metrocard from my wallet, he grabbed my wallet and ran away as fast as he could. FML

#6336608
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17253) - you deserved it (26575)

On 11/17/2009 at 12:25am - misc - by HunniBeeHuni (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was looking at the annoucements in the newspaper and find out that my boyfriend of the past 6 years is supposed to be married in 2 days to what I thought was his ex-girlfriend. FML

#6335131
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40223) - you deserved it (3223)

On 11/16/2009 at 11:01pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, while I was in the middle of making love with my boyfriend, I mentioned bringing another lady in the picture to spice it up. He looked at me and said "let's ask your sister." He then got dressed and called her. FML

#6334893
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10795) - you deserved it (28530)

On 11/16/2009 at 10:46pm - intimacy - by 3sacrowd (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my husband and I put our 9 month old twins to bed and went outside to enjoy a very rare few minutes with each other, a couple of beers, with a baby monitor. He shut the sliding glass door, and I watched the bar that locks it accidentally slide into locked position. All the other doors were locked. FML

Today, my boyfriend came over to celebrate our anniversary. He had a card written in crayon with my name spelled wrong, and a basket I had seen his mother throw in the trash filled with flower petals ripped from my mom's garden. Our anniversary was 3 days ago. FML

#6326207
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41165) - you deserved it (5560)

On 11/16/2009 at 1:12pm - love - by TLT (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I called my mother who is vacationing in Florida with my dad and sister. Before they left I told them I would be very responsible and that they could trust me. The first thing she asked me is if all the animals were still alive. I said yes. I lied. Her favourite cat drowned in the pool. FML

#6325781
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10263) - you deserved it (39430)

On 11/16/2009 at 12:11pm - animals - by baddaughter (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, the maintenance workers finally came to my apartment to fix the shower-head that kept falling off the wall. I was annoyed because they had replaced it a few weeks ago and since then, it'd been a problem. They went into my bathroom, turned the shower head around, and left. FML

#6324713
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7276) - you deserved it (26197)

On 11/16/2009 at 9:04am - misc - by BadatDIY (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, some obnoxious guys started calling me ugly. I tried to ignore them and be the bigger person. That's pretty hard to do when they start throwing rocks at you. FML

#6324167
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46369) - you deserved it (3310)

On 11/16/2009 at 6:39am - kids - by x0SoReckless0x (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my boss made me wear reindeer antlers to promote the Christmas spirit. There are still 5 weeks till Christmas. FML

#6323908
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27329) - you deserved it (3822)

On 11/16/2009 at 5:40am - work - by bakergirl (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I stood in line for one hour to get a new phone. It then took me 2 minutes to drop it and shatter the screen, and 2 seconds for the employee to look at, laugh, and tell me, "That Sucks." FML

#6322699
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15444) - you deserved it (30422)

On 11/16/2009 at 2:29am - misc - by bananaface (woman) - United States (Texas)



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