Today, I discovered that my best friend of 3 years has me in her phone as "Stupid Bitch". FML

by hahahawoww / 01/30/2010 at 7:32pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was rushed to the hospital because I was crying so hard I couldn't breathe. Why was I crying? My favorite anime character died. FML

by Obsessed / 01/30/2010 at 3:54pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I caught my boyfriend cheating so I broke up with him. As revenge he threw my PS3 and XBox out of the window when I wasn't in our house. I got those consoles out of the spare money my three jobs had brought in - the same three jobs I had to get because he refused to get a job of his own. FML

by GamerGirl / 01/30/2010 at 10:17am / United Kingdom (St. Helens) / Love

Today, my boyfriend, of a year, got drunk and called me flat chested then said the reason he won't have sex with me anymore is because he is "used" to me. He said all of this in front of his friends. FML

by Anonymous / 01/30/2010 at 9:25am / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I realized that the only reason my boyfriend has been coming over to hang out at my house for the past two months is because my little brother has an N64. I have become a third wheel to their mario kart dates. FML

by wowsucks / 01/30/2010 at 4:40am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was woken up by my own fart. FML

by Wowsers. / 01/30/2010 at 3:47am / United Kingdom (Blackpool) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was babysitting three little kids. I decided to give one of them (a seven-year-old) a piggy-back ride, thinking I'm strong enough. I managed to get a few feet before faceplanting on the wooden floor. She is fine though, no pain or anything. My face took the impact for both of us. FML

by ouchy / 01/30/2010 at 12:05am / United States (Illinois) / Kids

Today, the guy that I'm in love with and plan to marry some day told me he would choose a million dollars over me. I got upset and told him I no longer want to be with him. In an excited voice he said, "Really? So are you serious I don't have to worry about this love stuff anymore?" FML

by Star / 01/30/2010 at 12:01am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I was in the bathroom getting ready to take a shower. I took all of my clothes off, and stepped into the shower facing the knobs. When I turned around, I saw somebody standing in there with me. Apparently, my little brother and his friend were playing hide and seek, and I found his friend. FML

by soonaked / 01/29/2010 at 7:02pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I discovered that the seal on my driver's door is defective. I made this discovery when I got rained on while I was getting my car washed. FML

by minette08 / 01/29/2010 at 4:38pm / United States (Michigan) / Transportation

Today, I decided to cut class with one of my friends and we ended up going to Burger King. As we sat down at the table, I heard my name being called. My mum was getting lunch through the drive thru with my little brother and saw my car parked out front. FML

by Anonymous / 01/29/2010 at 2:58pm / United Kingdom (Kirklees) / Miscellaneous

Today, it was very windy and snowy and the neighborhoods garbage cans were blowing everywhere. I had already brought mine in and I saw my neighbor's being blown away. Thinking I'd be nice, I went out to pick it up. Just before I could however, the wind smashed it into me and I fell on the ice. FML

by Dana / 01/29/2010 at 1:59pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out my dad bought an iPhone. I've spent the better part of the last six months teaching him how to check his email and online newspapers. FML

by anonymas / 01/29/2010 at 10:29am / Norway (Troms) / Miscellaneous