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Man or woman?

Today, my dad finally used the electric shaver I bought him for Christmas. My dog now has bald patches. FML

#6987202
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24586) - you deserved it (3340)

On 12/28/2009 at 2:30am - animals - by dumbdad (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I allowed my friend to talk me into going on a date. The guy's truck smelled like formaldehyde - I'm assuming from the snake that he apparently tried to turn into a necklace. FML

#6985807
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26372) - you deserved it (3009)

On 12/28/2009 at 1:26am - love - by KittyNeko (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was messing around with my boyfriend, trying to get him to tell me he loved me more than KISS, his favorite band. He couldn't do it. FML

#6985452
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26473) - you deserved it (11474)

On 12/28/2009 at 1:13am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, my mom held an intervention for me. Yesterday, I told her I'd tried pot once. Seven years ago. FML

#6983853
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32554) - you deserved it (5608)

On 12/28/2009 at 12:02am - health - by EgoMoose (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I realized that my dad is more comfortable talking to the dog than sitting in the same room as me. FML

#6981473
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23934) - you deserved it (2696)

On 12/27/2009 at 10:14pm - animals - by hated (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was watching 'Caillou'. It was a Christmas special for pre-schoolers. I was quite enjoying myself, when it hit me that my kid had been in bed for an hour. I forget what adult TV is. FML

#6979481
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25038) - you deserved it (6210)

On 12/27/2009 at 8:36pm - kids - by Jen (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend told me how he used to collect little things when he was younger. He then decided to tell me about his current big toe nail collection. FML

#6976804
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28659) - you deserved it (3430)

On 12/27/2009 at 5:34pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I remembered my mom got her carpet cleaned and to be careful while she was at work. To be nice, I vacuumed the whole house. Feeling proud of myself, I got a drink and went upstairs. I tripped and spilled red Kool-Aid all over the floor. FML

#6976718
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24536) - you deserved it (13720)

On 12/27/2009 at 5:25pm - misc - by xMiSS_CuTiEx (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was singing while lying upside down chewing gum. My dad was trying to focus on the current football game and hushed me. I yelled, "No!" resulting in my gum becoming lodged in my windpipe. I shut up after all. FML

#6976652
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6711) - you deserved it (49883)

On 12/27/2009 at 5:22pm - misc - by LaurenLehmmman (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was driving in the car with my boyfriend and he couldn't keep his hands off me. Nothing to complain about when your boyfriend likes to touch you, right? Except when he keeps smacking your jiggly thighs to watch the ripples and 'tenderize the pork chops'. FML

#6971374
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34519) - you deserved it (7526)

On 12/27/2009 at 9:19am - love - by porkythighs (woman) - Singapore

Today, I was in bed with my cat on my lap. No one was around, so I felt comfortable enough to let out a huge fart. What I didn't expect was my cat jumping up and then clawing and biting my crotch. FML

#6971032
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14432) - you deserved it (27911)

On 12/27/2009 at 8:04am - animals - by axwound (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I bought a puppy. I just found out I can't bring it on the family trip. To save me the trouble of finding a friend to take her in, my mum handed her back to the pound. FML

#6969552
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33993) - you deserved it (3729)

On 12/27/2009 at 3:48am - misc - by DroopyDog (woman) - Netherlands (Flevoland)

Today, I found out that my boyfriend wrote 50 dollars on my gift card just to look generous, it's really only worth five. I found this out after I tried to buy an arm full of clothes. FML

#6969342
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36168) - you deserved it (2962)

On 12/27/2009 at 3:34am - money - by Cheap (woman) - United States (Washington)



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