Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Today, I got all dressed up for a New Year's party. When my parents and siblings left the house to their parties, I got undressed. I wasn't going to a party. I only got dressed up so my family would think I had plans. FML

#7089085
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33292) - you deserved it (6635)

On 01/01/2010 at 8:19pm - misc - by Shawna (woman) - United States (Delaware)

Today, it was my birthday dinner with my family. Everyone was making an effort to avoid a certain topic. Later my 5 year old cousin gives me a nice hand drawn card of me and my boyfriend. Apparently no one had the heart to tell her my boyfriend had broken up with me on my birthday. FML

#7088196
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31295) - you deserved it (2701)

On 01/01/2010 at 7:33pm - love - by Singleton (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, is January 1st. Last night, I threw a party. Only 3 people came. Luckily, one of the people who came was the love of my life, I had been hoping to get a midnight kiss from him. Unluckly, he decided to get back with his ex-girlfriend. At my party. They were liplocked almost the whole time. FML

#7087777
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28452) - you deserved it (4260)

On 01/01/2010 at 7:09pm - love - by ScrewedOver (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, when I was unpacking all of my stuff, my parents declared that they are going to live in Australia, and have found me a 'friend'. I am a 14 year old girl at boarding school, and my friend is my new foster mum. FML

#7086130
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48724) - you deserved it (2688)

On 01/01/2010 at 5:07pm - work - by manksy (woman) - United Kingdom (North Yorkshire)

Today, I was snuggled in bed with my husband. He thought because my butt was twitching that I was trying to be frisky. So he slapped my ass hard in attempt to get something going. I was actually trying to hold in a huge fart because last night I had diarrhea. Apparently I still have it. FML

#7084392
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29525) - you deserved it (3731)

On 01/01/2010 at 3:23pm - intimacy - by Lovergirl (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, the 6 year old girl I was babysitting asked me, "Why are you so ugly? Are you an alien? Because aliens are about as ugly as you are." FML

#7079923
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37516) - you deserved it (3818)

On 01/01/2010 at 10:41am - kids - by silverstar189 (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I came home from a new years party wearing a shower curtain and nothing else. FML

#7079223
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8003) - you deserved it (39879)

On 01/01/2010 at 9:13am - misc - by NotANaturist (woman) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)

 Today, while I was trying to get to sleep, I heard a strange noise coming from the bunk bed above mine. I looked up to see what it was and my cat vomited over the edge, onto my face. FML

#7078768
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29936) - you deserved it (3254)

On 01/01/2010 at 8:03am - animals - by grosssss (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, it is New Year's Day. While all of my friends are out partying, I stayed home and mastered level 34 on FarmVille. FML

#7075240
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12624) - you deserved it (35274)

On 01/01/2010 at 3:16am - misc - by thatsjustlovely (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was forced to spend New Years Eve with my strict/conservative parents in the middle of nowhere in Illinois. If I had nothing else, I looked forward to watching the ball drop in NYC. As the seconds counted down the T.V. shut off. Parental controls shut down cable at midnight. FML

#7073820
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36021) - you deserved it (2688)

On 01/01/2010 at 2:11am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my sister-in-law asked why I wasn't out partying with my friends to celebrate the new year. My mom then asked "What friends?". Ah, the new year begins. FML

#7072214
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25814) - you deserved it (2808)

On 01/01/2010 at 1:10am - misc - by nobffs (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I realized the odd smell I've been trying to get out of the house is coming from me. FML

#7072130
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8510) - you deserved it (31563)

On 01/01/2010 at 1:07am - misc - by _akwardsituation (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was with my boyfriend of two months, hoping this would be our night of the first kiss. I was so excited when the ball started to drop. When it hit "0", I turned to him, hoping for a kiss, and saw him making out with another girl. He didn't even turn around. FML

#7070397
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40850) - you deserved it (7348)

On 01/01/2010 at 12:12am - love - by ItSucks (woman) - United States (Ohio)



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie delivers in 2016
  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: