Today, I got all my co-workers motivated. We were all going to quit and walk out the door. I went first. I gave an emotional speech to my boss and threw my uniform to the ground. Then I turned around to to see the rest follow, they all began laughing. They didn't. They WANTED me to quit. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42901) - you deserved it (25379)
On 04/08/2009 at 8:34pm - work - by ineedanewjob (woman) - United States (Missouri)
Today, my good friend who just had a baby girl sent her newborn's pictures to me via picture message. To reply, instead of writing "Awwwwww" I wrote "Ewwwwww" by mistake. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21173) - you deserved it (48365)
On 04/08/2009 at 4:42pm - kids - by nothing (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I had to return a shirt to Target. My mom offered to do it for me on her way to work, so I gave her the shirt and receipt. Later, I realized that on the same receipt I had purchased condoms, lube, and whipped cream. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12163) - you deserved it (59423)
On 04/08/2009 at 4:34pm - misc - by UGH (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my daughter's school was putting on a fashion show for charity and all the kids were supposed to ask their mothers to be in it. I asked my daughter about it and she said "well I was going to ask you, but they said only to 'ask all of your BEAUTIFUL mommies." FML
I agree, your life sucks (59785) - you deserved it (2592)
On 04/08/2009 at 4:08pm - kids - by livay315 (woman) - United States (Vermont)
Today, I met a guy online. We talked all night long and hit it off amazingly. He told me he'd never felt that way about anyone else, and I agreed. He sent me a picture and he was gorgeous. I sent him one after he assured me he didn't care what I looked like. I haven't heard from him since. FML
I agree, your life sucks (59087) - you deserved it (8850)
On 04/08/2009 at 3:19am - love - by DL06 (woman) - United States (Arkansas)
Today, my boss informed me that it is now my responsibility to wash the dishes, since my co-workers are consistently too lazy to clean up after themselves. I have a bachelor's degree. Which I earned at the same university I now work at. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43513) - you deserved it (5032)
On 04/08/2009 at 2:08am - work - by aeterne (woman) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I bought a new purple shirt and decided to wear it to this charity function I was going to. I thought I looked pretty good in it. Then I got home and realized I left the sticker on. I had an "XL" sticker on my boob all night. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15593) - you deserved it (33259)
On 04/08/2009 at 1:38am - misc - by jessica238 (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, while getting my hair done, I was annoyed that the beautician was not paying attention while straightening my hair. After asking her three times to watch what she was doing, I grabbed the iron and said "let me do it, you're going to burn me!". I then burned two layers of skin off my ear. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6450) - you deserved it (78735)
On 04/08/2009 at 1:18am - misc - by jerkgirl (woman) - United States (Alabama)
Today, my mom asked me to look through old VHS tapes to throw away, I found one that said "Ashley's kindergarten Play-'95", I put the tape in, it begins to play, only to see "Days of our lives", "Melrose Place", and "ER". My childhood memories are ranked lower than tv shows. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47644) - you deserved it (2275)
On 04/07/2009 at 10:53pm - love - by 4gottenmemories (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, I was volunteering at a school. There's this really bratty boy there and he was being rude, so I joked, "How are you ever gonna get a girlfriend when you're so mean?" He responds, "I think the better question is how are you ever gonna get a boyfriend when you're so ugly." He's 7. FML
I agree, your life sucks (59802) - you deserved it (15458)
On 04/07/2009 at 7:34pm - kids - by ugly (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, we had a school assembly at 7:00pm about drinking and driving. There was a cop doing a demonstration of a feild sobriety test on stage. I was randomly selected to perform a breathalyzer test infront of all the students and parents. I blew. 06%. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18543) - you deserved it (73724)
On 04/07/2009 at 4:44pm - health - by schoolgrlstaci (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I got back my math test. Instead of taking the time to mark the mistakes, my professor just circled the bottom half of the page and wrote "OMG." FML
I agree, your life sucks (80040) - you deserved it (21099)
On 04/07/2009 at 2:37pm - work - by aviators (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I got accepted to the North America Scholar Consortium as a Member of the Highest Honor, which I had applied for a few weeks ago. Happy to be able to add something good to my resume, I called my mom excitedly, and then Googled it to ascertain the level of prestige. Turns out it's a scam. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36921) - you deserved it (21027)
On 04/07/2009 at 12:45pm - misc - by AlmostScdOtOf68Bucks (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Monday 20 May 2013
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