Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Today, I found out that my ex-husband just had a baby with his new partner. We only split up a week ago. FML

#6808095
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35279) - you deserved it (2214)

On 12/18/2009 at 8:02am - love - by paula123 (woman) - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)

Today, my boyfriend and I were using our skype accounts for the first time. He went to the restroom and I thought that I'd surprise him with my clothes off for when he came back. I heard him walk back into the room so I got into position. It wasn't him. It was his mom. FML

#6806655
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8093) - you deserved it (21609)

On 12/18/2009 at 3:25am - intimacy - by Jssceli09 (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, a cute guy asked for my phone number and I gladly gave it to him. I was feeling really good about myself for getting hit on by the star football player. That was until he called 8 times and left 5 messages. In 2 hours. FML

#6804648
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25753) - you deserved it (9244)

On 12/18/2009 at 12:23am - misc - by WhoaThere (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend's mother called me. She assumed that I bought him a PS3 for Christmas, and she and the rest of his family have only purchased him games to go with it. The thing is, I already got him an expensive gift. Now, I have to scramble to come up with the money to get this for him instead, and save the coat I bought for his birthday. FML

Today, my grandpa sent me a letter apologizing for not congratulating me about my graduation last spring. Too bad I don't graduate until May. FML

#6795980
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23124) - you deserved it (4025)

On 12/17/2009 at 5:08pm - misc - by chill (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, a spider crawled across my glasses' lens. My first reaction was to smack myself in the face. FML

#6793560
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14106) - you deserved it (26035)

On 12/17/2009 at 2:09pm - animals - by ohmy (woman) - Canada

Today, I set up a miniature nativity scene in my apartment. Three hours ago, my dog decided it would be a good idea to eat baby Jesus. Two hours ago, the vet laughed and said not to worry because I would 'have him back in time for Christmas'. FML

#6791199
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25314) - you deserved it (5298)

On 12/17/2009 at 9:32am - animals - by gettingacat (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my sister-in-law told me calmly that she never cared for me, likes her brother's ex more than me, and probably will always dislike me. It was our first serious conversation ever, that I initiated because I wanted to "maintain our great friendship." FML

#6790649
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26729) - you deserved it (2845)

On 12/17/2009 at 7:49am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I spent five minutes trying to kill a spider with my mind. FML

#6789867
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9580) - you deserved it (41453)

On 12/17/2009 at 4:58am - animals - by AnRom (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend and I went to the beach. I though he was being really sweet by putting sunscreen on my back as I layed on my stomach. I got home later, and felt that my back was sore. Then I saw the giant penis on my back that been burnt in. FML

#6789121
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36044) - you deserved it (5691)

On 12/17/2009 at 2:57am - work - by Brittanyy_leigh (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I felt like too much of a loser to go to a Christmas party, since I'd be the only one going without a date. I had to invent imaginary friends who were "coming into town for the holidays" to feel like less of a loser. FML

#6788841
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23982) - you deserved it (9288)

On 12/17/2009 at 2:25am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I walked into Old Navy to buy myself a pair of jingle jammies. Save yourself the embarrassment: don't shake the jammies in the middle of the store to hear the jingling, because these jammies do not jingle. You'll just look like an idiot. FML

#6787004
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7056) - you deserved it (31957)

On 12/17/2009 at 12:07am - misc - by sarabalism (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I tried to rid my son of his pacifier. He still uses it to sleep. My son is 20 years old. FML

#6783679
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31902) - you deserved it (22978)

On 12/16/2009 at 8:57pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: