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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I woke up at 4am needing a piss, only to walk in on my fuckstick brother combing his pubes with our mom's toothbrush. FML

#21329304
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30084) - you deserved it (2167)

On 01/02/2015 at 11:20am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, when my roommate asked me what was wrong, I told him that something I ate was making me feel sick. He works 10+ hours a day, and I didn't have the heart to tell him that the putrid smell of his feet was making me nauseous. FML

#21329068
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28352) - you deserved it (4075)

On 01/02/2015 at 12:36am - misc - by jitterbug (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, as usual, my boyfriend referred to his penis in the third person as "Mr. Willy". Even during sex. FML

#21328962
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27449) - you deserved it (3760)

On 01/01/2015 at 10:22pm - intimacy - by mrwilly (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend finally played the new guitar I bought to replace the one he broke. He used a $1000 guitar to play me a moving song about my butt. FML

#21328639
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23879) - you deserved it (4653)

On 01/01/2015 at 1:16pm - love - by ButtWorthSingingBout (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I had to explain to my little brother that my pads were not in fact "big band-aids" and that he should probably remove them from his legs. FML

#21328540
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28203) - you deserved it (2766)

On 01/01/2015 at 10:09am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I'm celebrating New Years with my cat. I made her a cake. FML

#21328260
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27445) - you deserved it (5883)

On 01/01/2015 at 12:25am - misc - by HappyNewYearsToMeAndMyCat (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I got a letter from my long time boyfriend asking me to meet him at the place we first met for a "surprise". I can't remember where that even is. FML

#21327916
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26567) - you deserved it (10628)

On 12/31/2014 at 3:59pm - love - by lunab123 (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I went to a club to celebrate New Year's Eve. A cute guy came up to me at the bar and asked my name. I thought my 8 year long dry spell was finally about to end. I smiled and said "Chrissy!" He said "That's a whore's name!" and wandered back off into the crowd. FML

#21327860
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31482) - you deserved it (2975)

On 12/31/2014 at 2:39pm - love - by cakestar9 (woman) - Ireland (Clare)

Today, I found out my 7-year-old daughter really did lie about my husband's "other girlfriend" as revenge for being grounded, and that he never cheated on me at all. We're well into our divorce proceedings and he won't forgive me for not believing him when he denied it. FML

#21327839
301 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23338) - you deserved it (42317)

On 12/31/2014 at 2:00pm - kids - by skanula414 (woman) - Sweden (Skane Lan)

Today, my sister is having a New Year's Eve party at our house. I'm not invited. FML

#21327508
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28779) - you deserved it (2595)

On 12/30/2014 at 11:29pm - misc - by Excalibur6669 (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I am struggling with exhaustion due to insomnia. The reason I cannot sleep is crippling anxiety - not about my complicated romantic situation, my pileup of work, or even my relationship with my father. No, I'm afraid of a blind ship captain I saw in a dream three days ago. FML

#21327341
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23309) - you deserved it (4166)

On 12/30/2014 at 6:47pm - health - by insomniacap (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I called asking about a job I interviewed for 3 weeks ago. It's a scummy call center where known drug addicts work. They told me I wasn't getting the job. I guess my high school diploma and being drug-free makes me not good enough to work there. FML

Today, after we had sex, my boyfriend told me how my orgasms used to make him think I was having a seizure. FML

#21327166
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27068) - you deserved it (3240)

On 12/30/2014 at 1:15pm - intimacy - by GladYoureConcerned (woman) - United States (Arizona)



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  • Hello everyone, how's it going? You doing OK? Friday is the right time to get your glad rags on, go out, meet your friends, have a drink, get your freak on, shoot the breeze, shoot some hoops, don't shoot…

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