Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Today, I was playing Charades. My boyfriend, who I'd recently had a fight with, had trouble and just said his answer was the name of my celebrity twin. Nobody got it. He said "Really? It's Fat Bastard." Stunned silence followed, broken by a single "HAH." from my 'best friend'. FML

#21340816
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28741) - you deserved it (3361)

On 01/20/2015 at 6:04am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I decided to use an at-home waxing kit for the first time to get rid of the hair on my upper lip. After experiencing the trauma of waxing, I fell asleep. A few hours later, I woke up to see that I now have acne everywhere I had waxed. I have an acne mustache. FML

#21340725
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27882) - you deserved it (4088)

On 01/20/2015 at 1:14am - misc - by iamamermaid (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while walking to work, I sneezed so violently that I slipped on a patch of ice and hit the ground hard, badly spraining my shoulder. I lay there in agony as a pair of bystanders just stood there, laughing their asses off. FML

#21340378
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28264) - you deserved it (2575)

On 01/19/2015 at 5:07pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I met my boyfriend's best friend. She was a girl he's known for years, and I respected that. She was sweet, until my boyfriend went to the bathroom and she threatened to stab me if I don't leave him. He doesn't believe me, and accused me of having serious jealousy issues. FML

#21340122
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35840) - you deserved it (2360)

On 01/19/2015 at 8:35am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, after the longest time, I went to the gym. I ran and ran and ran on the treadmill for an eternity, beating myself up for getting so overweight. Then I tripped and fell off, sweating and sobbing for being so useless. When I looked up, I saw I'd been on the machine for barely 2 minutes. FML

#21339526
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26442) - you deserved it (18563)

On 01/18/2015 at 11:34am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland

Today, my boyfriend's dad called me a whore and said I'm trying to use his son and "steal" his virginity for my own needs. My boyfriend has had sex with over 10 girls and I'm a virgin. FML

#21339329
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36760) - you deserved it (2589)

On 01/18/2015 at 1:29am - intimacy - by virginwhore (woman) -

Today, I had to explain to my teenage daughter that The Interview wasn't a documentary and that Kim Jong-un wasn't actually assassinated by a pair of goofy reporters. FML

#21338906
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26790) - you deserved it (5586)

On 01/17/2015 at 1:11pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my mom paid me a surprise visit me at my university dorm. She ended up rifling through my stuff and started to pull out a box from on top of my wardrobe. Before I could stop her, it slipped and fell. Today's forecast: 100% chance of dildo rain. FML

#21338507
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31445) - you deserved it (4494)

On 01/16/2015 at 8:41pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my mother kindly brought me some soup as was recovering from having my tonsils out. Spicy Mexican bean soup. Yep, very spicy. FML

#21338407
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26935) - you deserved it (2083)

On 01/16/2015 at 4:59pm - health - by Jensa (woman) - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)

Today, I had to repeatedly explain to an increasingly angry lady that no, she couldn't get an ultrasound by using a referral letter from her psychic. FML

#21338280
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24870) - you deserved it (2721)

On 01/16/2015 at 1:05pm - work - by 360whoroscoped (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was faced with the inevitable horrible circumstances which lead me to put in a tampon on a moving city bus. FML

#21337228
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30257) - you deserved it (4538)

On 01/14/2015 at 9:18pm - misc - by bloody_hell (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I dreamed that I cheated on my boyfriend. I was so overwhelmed with guilt that I called him while half-asleep to tell him about it and apologize. I'm fully awake now and he doesn't believe it was really a dream. FML

#21336949
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31512) - you deserved it (7187)

On 01/14/2015 at 12:35pm - love - by ihateeverything (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to explain to my grandmother why, "What a nice singing voice! He doesn't sound black at all!" is not a compliment. FML

#21336801
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30710) - you deserved it (2562)

On 01/14/2015 at 2:18am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nevada)



Ronald Grandpey's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Ronald Grandpey's illustrated FML
  • Hello everyone, how's it going? You doing OK? Friday is the right time to get your glad rags on, go out, meet your friends, have a drink, get your freak on, shoot the breeze, shoot some hoops, don't shoot…

Friday 30 January 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: