Today, through sheer luck, I got talking to an actor from the Harry Potter films who I've had a crush on since I was about ten. I tried to play it cool, and pretend I didn't know who he was. Then my phone rang, with the Harry Potter theme tune. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19789) - you deserved it (36921)
On 04/30/2013 at 6:23pm - misc - by itsellie27 (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)
Today, it's my wedding day. I have a cold sore that makes me look like The Joker. Make-up won't cover it and the emergency medicine my doctor gave me only irritates it more. My future husband asks, "Why so serious?" and laughs whenever he sees me. Fantastic. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37073) - you deserved it (2911)
On 04/30/2013 at 5:26pm - misc - by sharibaby (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, my guidance counselor told me that I'll have to join my school's special education needs sector. This is because I can't attend school properly due to chronic issues with severe pain. So much for my 3.9 GPA and being in the top 5% of my class. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41166) - you deserved it (2364)
On 04/30/2013 at 1:55pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, my boyfriend was watching TV, when we started getting frisky. I'd just started to give him a blowjob when he pushed me off and said, "Fun's over." Dragon Ball Z had just come back on. He's 21. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46187) - you deserved it (10833)
On 04/30/2013 at 1:35pm - intimacy - by SecondBest,IGuess (woman) - United States
Today, I was so nervous about a first date that trying to break a silence in the beginning, I asked, "So, you afraid of any insects?" No wonder I didn't get a second date. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30186) - you deserved it (9011)
On 04/30/2013 at 8:28am - love - by Gioia (woman) - Bulgaria (Vidin)
Today, while I was in the shower, I heard a door slam. Assuming it was my fiancé, I shouted "I love you!" I later opened the bathroom door to see my stereo and television missing. I'd said "I love you" to whoever robbed my apartment. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47142) - you deserved it (4090)
On 04/30/2013 at 3:54am - money - by ShowerGirl (woman) - United States
Today, my parents finally got married. At the after-party, my mother got drunk and informed me that even though she and my father were now married, it doesn't change the fact that I'm still a bastard. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37131) - you deserved it (2460)
On 04/29/2013 at 9:57pm - kids - by SierraCheyenne (woman) - United States (Missouri)
Today, a family of geese nested outside my halls of residence. They have started attacking everyone who tries to get in or out of the building. I'm basically being placed under house arrest by birds. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37037) - you deserved it (2871)
On 04/29/2013 at 12:14pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (York)
Today, I had yet another class with my psychotic, conservative, uber-religious teacher. The "well-known statistic" of today? Over 90% of people who have ever watched porn end up having a divorce due to psychological damage from said porn. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36296) - you deserved it (4459)
On 04/29/2013 at 3:32am - intimacy - by WTHChristianSchool (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I was getting into the mood with my boyfriend. Ten minutes into it, I told him to "teach me a lesson." His response: "I ain't no teacher." FML
I agree, your life sucks (37501) - you deserved it (8874)
On 04/29/2013 at 3:08am - intimacy - by unforgettablee (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my ten-year-old sister had to write out my job application because no one can read my terrible handwriting. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19340) - you deserved it (30978)
On 04/28/2013 at 7:40pm - work - by AbhorrentApplication (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I overheard my boyfriend telling his buddies that the main reason he got into video game modding was so he could put a virtual version of me in his games and "shoot the fuck out of that bitch". FML
I agree, your life sucks (44351) - you deserved it (5684)
On 04/28/2013 at 1:32pm - love - by gibbette (woman) - United Arab Emirates (Dubai)
Today, I was in the middle of having a shower when I noticed a camera hidden in the corner of the room pointing directly towards the shower which I stood in butt-naked. I live by myself and have recently only moved in. FML
I agree, your life sucks (55888) - you deserved it (2588)
On 04/28/2013 at 6:30am - misc - by wtfisgoingon (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)
Monday 17 June 2013
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