Today, I baked my friend a cake for his 21st birthday. When I arrived at his house, his girlfriend, who hadn't made him anything, screamed at me for "making her look bad." She then took the cake, banned me from the party, and kicked me out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42776) - you deserved it (3563)
On 04/14/2013 at 10:29pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - New Zealand (Wellington)
Today, I borrowed my 23-year-old son's laptop. The sticky keyboard gave me a good idea of his browsing history. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37575) - you deserved it (11645) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 04/14/2013 at 7:18pm - misc - by NiquetChrome (woman) - France
Today, my sister went into a blind rage at me for "upstaging" her by announcing that I'm pregnant, two months after she did the same. My husband and I have been trying for two years. She's in high school and doesn't even know who the father is. FML
I agree, your life sucks (62276) - you deserved it (2565)
On 04/14/2013 at 4:39pm - misc - by bntje (woman) - Netherlands (Overijssel)
Today, is the day of the biggest concert in the state of Florida, and it's also my birthday. I was so excited to hear my mom got tickets. It was for her boyfriend and her. I'm stuck at home babysitting. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48781) - you deserved it (3339)
On 04/14/2013 at 9:29am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, after an exhausting weekend of work, I decided to take a nap. I was awoken several hours later by my mother-in-law knocking on my door. Apparently my 11-year-old called up grandma to complain that she was hungry and that mum was sleeping instead of cooking dinner. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35985) - you deserved it (13511)
On 04/14/2013 at 5:58am - kids - by jasminejzhu (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I uploaded a cute photo of my boyfriend and me on Facebook. Ten minutes later, his friend commented: "Dude! You're supposed to capture the Snorlax, not date it!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (41926) - you deserved it (12192)
On 04/13/2013 at 12:25am - love - by Snorlax (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I went to the funeral of my friend's brother. It was the first funeral I'd gone to, and I was really nervous. When the service finished, everyone went to pay their respects to the family. After I paid mine, they said, "Thank you for coming." I instictively replied, "My pleasure." FML
I agree, your life sucks (33492) - you deserved it (7612)
On 04/12/2013 at 8:13pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. Just as I was about to orgasm, he pulled away and said that my vagina is like a mask and that he feels like Bane from Batman. He's been talking in a Bane voice to my vagina for 30 minutes now. I guess sex is over. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47440) - you deserved it (5712)
On 04/12/2013 at 11:34am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, my mom broke the news that my dad secretly got married two months ago, to a woman he has been dating for 15 years, and that my parents have actually been divorced for 12 years. They just lied about it this whole time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (55028) - you deserved it (3081)
On 04/12/2013 at 1:11am - misc - by too young for this (woman) - United States
Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex; I know that some women are great multitaskers, but I'm guessing it was a bad sign when she started to go over the shopping list. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36005) - you deserved it (6593)
On 04/12/2013 at 1:05am - intimacy - by Fml (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my Romeo and Juliet style relationship hit an all time low when my boyfriend's parents filed a lawsuit against my parents. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38206) - you deserved it (3420)
On 04/11/2013 at 8:40pm - love - by Juliet (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I got all dressed up, in high heels and a sparkly dress, to sit in the library for most of the night so that my roommate and his friends would believe that I have a social life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29678) - you deserved it (8513)
On 04/11/2013 at 8:00pm - misc - by InNeedOfFriends (woman) - United States
Today, I came home after working overtime to find my dog whining and giving me her "I need to take a shit" face. After changing my shoes, I came back ready to let her out, only to find her giving me the "I just took a shit on your rug" face. My husband has been home all day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34358) - you deserved it (3711)
On 04/11/2013 at 3:38pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Shropshire)
Friday 24 May 2013
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