Today, my car was stolen from the parking garage, the same one I work at as a security guard. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34707) - you deserved it (21163)
On 04/27/2013 at 6:05pm - work - by naps aren't what they used to be (man) - United States
Today, my psycho and now ex-girlfriend accused me of cheating on her with my own mother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47850) - you deserved it (2790)
On 04/27/2013 at 2:32pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Lithuania (Kauno Apskritis)
Today, nobody wants to hang out with me due to a nasty rumor that my ex has spread. No one will tell me what was said, because I apparently "know full well" what I did. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44563) - you deserved it (2961)
On 04/27/2013 at 1:02am - misc - by dabull (man) - United States
Today, my son had to help out at the local retirement home for his community service. He got in serious trouble and came whining to me about it after he tried threatening some of the residents into taking part in a Harlem Shake video. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34922) - you deserved it (4778)
On 04/26/2013 at 8:21pm - kids - by Shitty genes, no two ways about it. (man) - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, I was denounced for being a terrible person, because my family raises chickens, some of which we eat. I was then told how cruel I am for "killing innocent birds" and that "good" people buy their meat from the supermarket. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41336) - you deserved it (2228)
On 04/26/2013 at 2:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Mexico (Baja California)
Today, I overheard my grandpa telling my mom he'd found a load of porn in my laptop's browser history, but that he deleted all the "filth" so she wouldn't have to see it. She believed him and I got grounded, much to his amusement. I've never looked up porn on that computer in my life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35429) - you deserved it (2175)
On 04/26/2013 at 1:34pm - misc - by thats what my ipod is for (man) - United States
Today, as I was walking down the street, a car full of hot girls pulled up and asked if I wanted to party; obviously, I said yes. They then shot at me with party poppers and threw party food all over me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37035) - you deserved it (7693)
On 04/26/2013 at 4:36am - misc - by KingUrge (man) - United States (California)
Today, I was yelled at and called a pedophile by a mom for talking to her 5 year old girl. I work at a library and she looked like she needed help. This is the third time it has happened. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38486) - you deserved it (2807)
On 04/25/2013 at 9:37pm - kids - by LibraryPedo (man) - United States (California)
Today, I was making out with my girlfriend for the first time, and she reached down to feel me up. When her hands got there, she stopped and said, "You're not even hard..." I was. FML
I agree, your life sucks (59599) - you deserved it (6808)
On 04/24/2013 at 2:56pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, my seven-year-old nephew challenged me to a push up contest in front of my girlfriend. He beat me, and then asked my girlfriend why she's dating a pussy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45161) - you deserved it (18503)
On 04/24/2013 at 12:55am - kids - by BIGCHEIFAAA (man) - United States (California)
Today, I was fired on my second day of work after a year and a half of unemployment. Apparently, my "tendency to solve problems instead of just accepting them made the other workers uneasy". FML
I agree, your life sucks (43696) - you deserved it (2710)
On 04/24/2013 at 12:55am - work - by anonymous (man) - Germany
Today, I answered a call at work from a very irate gentleman. After being shouted and sworn at profusely, I ended the call in a slightly less than civil manner. Turns out that guy is one of our company's biggest clients. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24952) - you deserved it (35546)
On 04/23/2013 at 2:25pm - work - by hatemyjob (man) - United Kingdom (Essex)
Today, my pregnant wife paged my emergency line at work. Thinking she was in serious danger, I raced home and found her hysterically crying. When I asked her what was going on, she replied, "The dogs won't stop barking!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (43582) - you deserved it (5011)
On 04/23/2013 at 7:25am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Monday 20 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
