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Today, I found out I could not go to the Philippines because I have never had Chicken Pox. The school took the radical decision to prohibit students who have never had Chicken Pox to leave the college. I am condemned to stay in Hong Kong in some shitty project because I am a healthy young man. FML

#168373
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56767) - you deserved it (3701)

On 03/01/2009 at 3:14am - health - by Swaby (man) - Hong Kong

Today, I spent 300 dollars making colored flyers for my iPhone that I lost. On the flyer I wrote for whoever found it to call me and I would give a reward. I wrote the phone number of my iPhone that I lost. FML

#165039
21 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17682) - you deserved it (116667)

On 02/28/2009 at 9:42pm - misc - by Mike (man) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, after working for my company for 10 years, my co-workers threw me a farewell party. The boss gave quite an eloquent speech, ending in "we're really gonna miss you Mark." My name is Evan. FML

#163929
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60594) - you deserved it (2678)

On 02/28/2009 at 7:50pm - work - by Grrrrr (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my dad had gotten a new cell phone. So I started to mess around with the cool features on his phone and stumbled upon some pictures he had taken. Next thing I know I'm looking at my mom going down on my dad. FML

#163784
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44791) - you deserved it (23236)

On 02/28/2009 at 7:33pm - misc - by AppState (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my fiancée broke up with me. Via a myspace message. While we were in the same apartment. FML

#163689
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (312538) - you deserved it (23429)

On 02/28/2009 at 7:22pm - love - by loser (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I went to get a sports physical at a hospital. My nurse was morbidly obese and unattractive. She told me she would go through the tests listed on the sheet. She did everything, including feeling my genitalia. When it was done, I read over the sheet. Genitalia wasn't a test listed. FML

#162461
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (146004) - you deserved it (12666)

On 02/28/2009 at 4:58pm - health - by TahRah (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was stepping out of the shower while home alone. I heard voices coming from the living room. I grabbed a bat to defend my self and ran into the living room. I slipped on my tile floor and smashed my TV with the bat. No one was in my house but I left my radio turned on. FML

#159713
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15238) - you deserved it (38882)

On 02/28/2009 at 8:08am - misc - by Slipperywhenwet (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was at church and saw a blind teenager who obviously felt lost. Feeling like I should help I went over and asked if he needed anything. He said, "I can't find my caretaker." I asked, "What does she look like?" FML

#159157
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13388) - you deserved it (56718)

On 02/28/2009 at 2:59am - misc - by wideman (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was at the school's rec center, working out for the first time in a while. While there, there was this very mysteriously attractive girl who kept shooting me glances. I asked for her number and she responded by saying "if you can lift this same weight as me". I couldn't. FML

#157992
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34841) - you deserved it (10742)

On 02/28/2009 at 12:03am - misc - by caswell 1 (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my boss said he was giving me a significant raise. After he requested the payroll department to raise my salary they informed him he needed to fill out a one-sheet form. He took my raise away because he didn't want to fill out that sheet. FML

#154769
18 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60946) - you deserved it (2110)

On 02/27/2009 at 6:05pm - work - by anabolic (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I flew into New Zealand to surprise my girlfriend on her trip. In the New Zealand Airport I received a text message saying she wanted to break up with me. I live in Michigan and just spent $1,500 for this romantic surprise. FML

#153783
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (82664) - you deserved it (6168)

On 02/27/2009 at 4:19pm - love - by uthinkucandraw (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I drank for every year I've been in school. While in my bed I decided I was too drunk to get up and throw up in the bathroom so I decided to just do it on my floor and clean it up later. Later on I woke up and realized I threw up on my $1000 laptop. FML

#153348
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24535) - you deserved it (196445)

On 02/27/2009 at 3:28pm - health - by ugh!! (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I hit a car while trying to answer a phone call from my mom. I quickly answered the phone and shouted "What!?". To which she replied, "I just had a bad feeling in my gut about you so I wanted to make sure you were ok." FML

#152273
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43344) - you deserved it (12731)

On 02/27/2009 at 12:43pm - misc - by wwasmer (man) - United States (Missouri)



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