Today, I got a phone call from my mother asking me if I was okay. Confused, I asked her what she meant. She then told me that my boyfriend had broken up with me, and she just wanted to make sure I was handling it alright. I had to find out my relationship was over from my mom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (62038) - you deserved it (2451)
On 03/01/2009 at 3:02pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I was questioned about a request for a restraining order filed against me by an old woman. According to the report, she's seen me "walking near her house and waving at her" for the last two months. I've been her next-door neighbor for a year and a half. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50599) - you deserved it (1591)
On 03/01/2009 at 1:37pm - misc - by Friendly (man) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I was walking through Borders with my girlfriend, when we pass a girl scout cookies stand. I see a box of Samoas, my favorite, point at them, and shout, 'YEAH'. My girlfriend looks shocked. Behind the box of cookies was a five year old scout bending over, with her bottom pointed at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47136) - you deserved it (11846)
On 03/01/2009 at 12:55pm - misc - by Scottrick (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I was typing up a love letter on my computer. A sexual love letter. I was in a classroom, I'm the teacher, I'm gay, and my love letter showed up on the tv screen while my 7th grade students were taking a test. It was up on the screen for 15 minutes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (55350) - you deserved it (216049)
On 03/01/2009 at 4:08am - intimacy - by Sad (man) - United States (California)
Today, my mom bought me a t-shirt from the store. It has the U.S. Marines logo on it and says "Marines' Girlfriend". I'm a straight 16 year old boy and my mom only reads and speaks Spanish. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47999) - you deserved it (3385)
On 03/01/2009 at 3:49am - misc - by Elis (man) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I was baking cookies. When I took the tray out of the oven I closed the door, but it bounced back open and hit me in the back of the knees. That caused me to sit down on the hot oven door. I was just wearing my short bathrobe and no underwear. I really burned my ass and um...stuff. FML
I agree, your life sucks (71084) - you deserved it (10855)
On 03/01/2009 at 3:45am - health - by Monty (man) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I asked my girlfriend if she has ever had an affair. She replied, "Yes. With you". FML
I agree, your life sucks (47109) - you deserved it (5833)
On 03/01/2009 at 3:34am - love - by Sdutent (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, I found out I could not go to the Philippines because I have never had Chicken Pox. The school took the radical decision to prohibit students who have never had Chicken Pox to leave the college. I am condemned to stay in Hong Kong in some shitty project because I am a healthy young man. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51266) - you deserved it (3087)
On 03/01/2009 at 3:14am - health - by Swaby (man) - Hong Kong
Today, I spent 300 dollars making colored flyers for my iPhone that I lost. On the flyer I wrote for whoever found it to call me and I would give a reward. I wrote the phone number of my iPhone that I lost. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14625) - you deserved it (98290)
On 02/28/2009 at 9:42pm - misc - by Mike (man) - United States (District of Columbia)
Today, after working for my company for 10 years, my co-workers threw me a farewell party. The boss gave quite an eloquent speech, ending in "we're really gonna miss you Mark." My name is Evan. FML
I agree, your life sucks (55117) - you deserved it (2175)
On 02/28/2009 at 7:50pm - work - by Grrrrr (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, my dad had gotten a new cell phone. So I started to mess around with the cool features on his phone and stumbled upon some pictures he had taken. Next thing I know I'm looking at my mom going down on my dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41501) - you deserved it (20332)
On 02/28/2009 at 7:33pm - misc - by AppState (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, my fiancée broke up with me. Via a myspace message. While we were in the same apartment. FML
I agree, your life sucks (278587) - you deserved it (22673)
On 02/28/2009 at 7:22pm - love - by loser (man) - United States (Arizona)
Today, I went to get a sports physical at a hospital. My nurse was morbidly obese and unattractive. She told me she would go through the tests listed on the sheet. She did everything, including feeling my genitalia. When it was done, I read over the sheet. Genitalia wasn't a test listed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (126586) - you deserved it (3742)
On 02/28/2009 at 4:58pm - health - by TahRah (man) - United States (Virginia)
Friday 24 May 2013
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