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Man or woman?

Today, I encountered one of my professors from college. Back when I was in his game theory class, he publicly criticized me for falling asleep and not paying attention, to which I retaliated by acing all of his exams. Four years and a degree later, I met him again... while working at Pizza Hut. FML

#6148515
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31258) - you deserved it (11831)

On 11/04/2009 at 7:56am - work - by mylifeisfed (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my roommate decided to fry some bacon. After finishing, he thought it would be easy to clean up if he just tossed the panful of grease out the second story window. Guess where I was standing at the time? FML

#6147856
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36001) - you deserved it (2220)

On 11/04/2009 at 5:12am - misc - by burned (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had an appointment with a psychotherapist. I was feeling very depressed and was telling her how I felt no one cared about me. Her phone rang and she left me mid-sentence to take a call about her new BMW. FML

#6145491
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31053) - you deserved it (3359)

On 11/04/2009 at 12:10am - health - by troubled (man) - United States (California)

Today, a woman evidently posted on a chat website asking for any young men to send pictures of their junk to her cell phone. Over 60 messages were sent, mostly by underage boys, most of them including the picture. Only problem. The number posted wasn't hers... It was mine. I'm a 21 year old guy. FML

#6137228
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24233) - you deserved it (2182)

On 11/03/2009 at 4:17pm - intimacy - by buckid310 (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, good news! The guitar I have been saving up for, for 5 months, finally arrived. It came inside a beautiful black and white case, and impossible to get into without the key. They didn't pack the key. FML

#6136343
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32579) - you deserved it (2494)

On 11/03/2009 at 3:08pm - misc - by RedLion23 (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I got stopped at the bank by security for carrying a weapon and threatened to call the police. I had to prove my “metal stick” was not a weapon. I am partially paralyzed in one of my feet and have to walk with a cane. FML

#6136055
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33424) - you deserved it (1771)

On 11/03/2009 at 2:49pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I asked my girlfriend about a diamond necklace I bought her for her birthday, which she didn't seem to be wearing. She then told me she hocked it to pay for her inexpensive phone bill. I paid $1,500 for that necklace, she received $300 from the pawn shop. FML

#6132139
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38275) - you deserved it (4214)

On 11/03/2009 at 6:02am - money - by I_Lossed (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. By making out with her new boyfriend in front of me. FML

#6131025
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39647) - you deserved it (2757)

On 11/03/2009 at 2:24am - love - by whysheheartless (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, the police came to my door and told me about a woman who called the cops on me because she said that I had been following her in my car. We were on the highway. FML

#6129254
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30185) - you deserved it (1655)

On 11/02/2009 at 11:33pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I got a letter confirming I had dropped out of college. I received this letter shortly after completing the 10th essay I had finished this week as a result of me deciding to finally apply myself to my schoolwork. Turns out that while dropping a class, I checked Drop All instead of Drop 1. FML

#6122684
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17762) - you deserved it (38837)

On 11/02/2009 at 5:35pm - misc - by Rman (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was hanging out with my friends. My friend started talking about how unfair it is that women can use their breasts to get promotions. I told him that he has no place to talk, as he used his "d*ck" a few months ago with his female boss. His girlfriend of 3 years was sitting next to me. FML

#6122066
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8517) - you deserved it (28650)

On 11/02/2009 at 5:03pm - intimacy - by konichiwa (man) - United States (California)

Today, I went to get a haircut. The hairdresser at the counter was kind of cute, so I had to say something non-standard. When she greeted me with her hello, I replied "Guess what I need from you today?" She looked at me, considered, and replied "An eyebrow wax?" FML

#6118642
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8400) - you deserved it (36219)

On 11/02/2009 at 12:48pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, the city shut off the water at my house because my roommate thought that the water bills he had been hoarding were "suggestions." FML

#6118488
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30500) - you deserved it (3021)

On 11/02/2009 at 12:30pm - money - by parched (man) - United States (Indiana)



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