Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, a short guy asked me how the world looked "up there", as I'm really tall. I decided to lift him up so he could see for himself. I failed both times I tried, to the great amusement of everyone watching. FML

#21525498
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6856) - you deserved it (2272)

On 02/12/2016 at 1:22pm - misc - by SK8WITME (man) - India

Today, I found out how painful it is to static shock the tip of your dick. FML

#21525225
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11784) - you deserved it (3458)

On 02/11/2016 at 4:51pm - intimacy - by Electro (man) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, after long day at work, I stopped by my parents' house to say hi. After 30 minutes into the visit, my dad turns to me and asks, "Did you really have to stop by while I was balls deep?" Apparently I interrupted my parents' sex time. FML

#21525176
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12651) - you deserved it (1464)

On 02/11/2016 at 1:59pm - intimacy - by CmS_1733 (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my sister punched me in the face. My dad was actually annoyed with me when I told him. He said I'll never be a "real man" if I can't take a hit from a girl. FML

#21525128
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13620) - you deserved it (2224)

On 02/11/2016 at 10:44am - misc - by J (man) - Malta

Today, I came inside a girl's vagina by accident. Neither one of us wants her to be pregnant, and I had to spend half an hour with her sitting on my face, while I sucked my own cum out of her. I don't even know if this will work. FML

#21524955
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7445) - you deserved it (39509)

On 02/10/2016 at 9:12pm - intimacy - by nickncik (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, there was an issue with the sewage system at work. It smelled like somebody took a turd, left it in the sun to marinate, threw up on it, then put in the air conditioning to fill the store with nauseating stink. I nearly threw up multiple times because we weren't allowed to leave early. FML

#21524799
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16431) - you deserved it (1074)

On 02/10/2016 at 11:57am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was called a "Potato" for at least the 30th time by people online for living in Idaho. I've lived here my whole life, I have yet to see a potato farm. None of these people has even left the East Coast. FML

#21524651
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15305) - you deserved it (1782)

On 02/10/2016 at 12:08am - misc - by ApparentlyaPotato (man) - United States (Idaho)

Today, the power in my village went out. This caused the back-up battery powered alarm to go off. Nobody in the house even knew our alarm worked, let alone how to make it stop. It's been going off for over an hour now. FML

#21524147
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15718) - you deserved it (1497)

On 02/08/2016 at 5:55pm - misc - by James (man) - United Kingdom (Sheffield)

Today, I saw my grandfather on the train, with his cock out. FML

#21523681
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21283) - you deserved it (1615)

On 02/07/2016 at 12:59pm - intimacy - by OhDearGodGrandad (man) - United Kingdom (Redbridge)

Today, the only thing that kept me hard during sex with my wife was thinking about my own naked body. FML

#21523607
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19098) - you deserved it (6924)

On 02/07/2016 at 4:17am - intimacy - by weirdoe (man) - Italy (Sicilia)

Today, while working third shift alone at a gas station, I had to deal with a crazy guy tripping balls and asking me if it was okay to bring a gun into the place. I don't get paid nearly enough for this. FML

#21523593
23 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18915) - you deserved it (1396)

On 02/07/2016 at 2:49am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I accidentally forwarded a link to a weird fart porn video to my chat group. They've been silent for 30 minutes now. FML

#21523269
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14528) - you deserved it (11398)

On 02/06/2016 at 12:55am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my grandma got drunk, tried to change the TV channel with my Xbox controller, and slurred at me to fuck off when I told her it wasn't the remote. She pulls this kind of crap way too often. FML

#21523258
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17343) - you deserved it (1335)

On 02/06/2016 at 12:04am - misc - by sick of this shit (man) - Canada (British Columbia)



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