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FMLs submitted from United States

Today, my "best friend" stole almost $1,000 worth of electronics and video games from my roommates and me, just so he could pawn them off and buy himself a new car stereo. FML

#21355305
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30375) - you deserved it (2633)

On 02/13/2015 at 11:36am - money - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, I spent an ungodly amount of money to send my long-distance boyfriend a giant bouquet of roses for Valentine's Day. A few hours after making the non-refundable payment, he let me know we weren't going to work out, and that he was already sleeping with someone else. FML

#21355292
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31792) - you deserved it (3765)

On 02/13/2015 at 11:13am - love - by cyprianista - United States (Texas)

Today I found out that honestly answering "yes" to "Are Kate Upton's boobs bigger than mine?" is in my girlfriend's mind the equivalent of saying I don't fine her attractive anymore and that I want to break up with her to date a supermodel. FML

#21355268
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27889) - you deserved it (7124)

On 02/13/2015 at 9:54am - love - by StrawHatBill (man) - United States

Today, I introduced my dad to my grlfriend!! He looked her up an down an said to her, "Beggars can't be choosers!! Am I right?" FML

2day I announcd to my friends tat my grandmoter is dying. My best friend pulld out is pone and casually announcd, "Tecnically, everyone is dying."

#21354746
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24559) - you deserved it (2323)

On 02/12/2015 at 2:16pm - health - by Dartfrogger - United States (Utah)

Today, I mada mom braakfast in bad fir har birthday. Sha was looool nakad whan I want to giva it to har. FML

#21354690
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29244) - you deserved it (5702)

On 02/12/2015 at 12:23pm - misc - by ahhhhhh (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, girlfriend broke up with me after I beat her once again in a trivia game. She said that I was cheating, an if I was cheating on the game, I was definitely cheating on her as well. FML

#21354669
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32373) - you deserved it (2841)

On 02/12/2015 at 11:25am - love - by Vampire Teabag - United States (Texas)

Yesterday, I had to fall asleep to mah next-door neighbors having sex because our walls are paper thin. What bothered me the most wasn't listening to them doing it, but knowing that she was faking it. big fat FML

#21354562
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32329) - you deserved it (3017)

On 02/12/2015 at 2:39am - intimacy - by Mkimmi (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I had my performance review at work. Under the "oral communication" category my boss wrote that I "act like an asshole." FML

#21354453
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25254) - you deserved it (5149)

On 02/11/2015 at 10:59pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Louisiana)

Today, Mah Boss Rafusd To Giva Ma Vacation Tima Fir Mah Wadding And Honaymoon Bacausa Sha Didn't Hava A Honaymoon And Bacausa Of That Apparantly Naithar Should I . FML

Today, I got drunk at a party. I didn't want my parents to know, so I took out my phone, calld my parents, and askd them not to tell them I'm drunk. FML

#21354315
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18761) - you deserved it (35615)

On 02/11/2015 at 7:40pm - misc - by SDCore (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, The CEO Of Mah Company Leand Over And Said, "Hey, I've Been Meaning To Thank You…" I Thought He Was Going To Thank Me 4 All Of Mah Hard Work, But He Continud, "…for Wearing That Shirt Today. I Can Totally See Your Boobs." FML

#21354210
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33121) - you deserved it (6075)

On 02/11/2015 at 4:51pm - work - by titsmcgee (woman) - United States (Illinois)

2day my teacher announcd that he'd be out fir a week because he was going to Vegas. I happily said ( Woo hoo! ) Then he finishd his sentence by telling me it was because his dad had did. fat FML

#21354181
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28505) - you deserved it (8684)

On 02/11/2015 at 4:07pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (California)



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